How do you deal with rude people?

[katisdale]

Malvasia, I have been able to use the lower boarding area on Princess. I use a rollator (rolling walker with seat) and have even been directed to that entry at some ports. We are going to Alaska this September and having never been there before am also a little nervous about the steep ramps. I am always hand wanded at the airports due to multiple joint replacements but after the first time or so on the ship they tend to wave me through or look into the non-removable fanny pack like attachment on the front of the walker.

[PDX3Wheeler]

I do have another question for you folks. From our last two trips to Alaska, I know that the change in the tides can really make a difference on the steepness of the gangplank. I was able to slowly pull myself up the last time, but with great difficulty, especially when the gangplank turned into stairs. I noticed that the crew was using a lower deck to disembark. Do you know if it is possible for passengers with mobility problems to use that exit?All the best,

Malvasia

The answer is yes, at least on RCI. We recently returned from a 14 day Alaska cruise on the Serenade and I had to use the lower gangway several times. Once, even that one was so steep I wasn't sure if I was going to make it. The stairs are scary! The several times I took my scooter ashore I also had trouble making it back up the gangway.

 

Roz

[malvasia]

Thank you all for the information. I just had a good laugh when I realized that I had referred to the gangway as the gangplank. Must have watched too many Pirates of the Carribean movies! It's good to know that the lower gangway may be available for me to use. Last time we went, I was so intimidated by the steepness of the gangway upon our return from an early morning Juneau whale watching excursion that I decided to remain on the ship, rather than going into town to look around.

 

Aloha

[1932Canal]

On one cruise there was a Lady (I use the term loosely) who when using the elevator would stand right in the doorway. So! when it arrived at your deck there she would be and one would suppose that she was getting off. But no! she just stood there and in a very sharp manner told you to get on the b..... elevator. To do that one would have to brush past her as she didn't move aside. We named her "Elevator Lady". One of the shore excursions involved a cruise on a Catamaran with limited awnings. A lady asked if those sitting under the awning could make room for her as she could not stand too much sun. The seated group complied but before the lady could take up a seat, Elevator Lady jumped in and sat down. Later Elevator Lady was seen sitting at the ship's side in the full sun because the view from there was much better. It was very easy to recognize Elevator Lady; she always wore the same outfit; that or she had a large number exactly the same.:eek:

[MandD]

Malvasia, You didn’t say which cruise line, but let me tell you of our experience with Princess. The ramp to the ship in Seattle is very long and quite steep. Do not be shy about asking for help; in fact request it in advance. If you contact the cruise line they will also provide a wheelchair for your use during the cruise, both on the ship and on shore (Alaska is ADA compliant). Crew members were extremely helpful when it came to getting on and off the ship. I’m sure whatever line you are sailing with will be equally helpful if you let them know in advance. Don’t forget to ask to have an elevated toilet seat. If you can’t have grab bars it helps a little. Also, you can ask for a shower seat/bench. My wife didn’t request one, but I was told they are available. I don’t know how it would fit into most of the shower stalls. Have a fantastic cruise.

[Ladypop]

Reading here has been really interesting, as we are planning our first cruise as a family. Myself, 18 and 13 y/o sons have Aspergers Syndrome. Hubby does not, he's the zookeeper, lol. Both my sons have very low muscle tone, which means that they can walk fine, but have issues with standing. Queuing is very hard, as they find it very difficult to maintain upright posture without movement.

I rang our cruise line (Princess) to find out about embarking/disembarking procedures and was told that we'll be able to board with w/c cruisers instead of standing and queuing. It'll be interesting to see if we get the usual comments from people who open their mouths before their brains are in gear.

There's the classic "but you look so normal" in a tone of great surprise. Hubby's general response is to inform them that he had our neck bolts removed for servicing. I love that man:D

[IRL_Joanie]

<SNIP> It'll be interesting to see if we get the usual comments from people who open their mouths before their brains are in gear.

There's the classic "but you look so normal" in a tone of great surprise. Hubby's general response is to inform them that he had our neck bolts removed for servicing. I love that man:D<SNIP>

 

 

LOVE, Absolutely LOVE your hubby's response!!!!

 

Joanie

[JYD Hawkeye]

My wife has polio and requires the use of a W/C or scooter to get around the ship. Maybe it is just the biker in me, but if someone butts into line or cuts us off getting into an elevator,I take it as a sign of aggression and I will deal with that person. My wife comes first in my life and I will give respect to others as warranted. If you push in in front of me, you might get pushed back out from in front of me. If you show some common sense and some courtisy, I will thank you and we will all have a great time.

Edited February 11, 2013 by JYD Hawkeye

[rbrugler]

The rudest person I have to deal with is my sister in law. We cruise with her and it is the only time each year that my wife and her are together. I use a scooter or rollator. Every time we get on a ship's elevator she announces that people need to watch their toes or I will run over them. She does the same thing when we get off. She walks behind me, where I cannot see her, and keeps repeating the toe warning to everyone. I hate it. I have asked her to stop. She wont.

[cello56]

The rudest person I have to deal with is my sister in law. We cruise with her and it is the only time each year that my wife and her are together. I use a scooter or rollator. Every time we get on a ship's elevator she announces that people need to watch their toes or I will run over them. She does the same thing when we get off. She walks behind me, where I cannot see her, and keeps repeating the toe warning to everyone. I hate it. I have asked her to stop. She wont.

 

Does your scooter have reverse? Cause boy oh boy I would be considering using it with her!

[SigalTchelet]

Wow-this has been an interesting read. I am in a power chair, sailing on the Disney Fantasy in November. I will have to be aware of the crazies, and make sure I am kind and courteous. I have dealt with scooters at Disneyland and it's so not fun to deal with crowds. We are out of people's aiteline and many times people just don't see us. I need to get a Megahorn, like Ty uses on EMHE. That will make me be heard! LOL

[olvrxyzh]

Wow-this has been an interesting read. I am in a power chair, sailing on the Disney Fantasy in November. I will have to be aware of the crazies, and make sure I am kind and courteous. I have dealt with scooters at Disneyland and it's so not fun to deal with crowds. We are out of people's aiteline and many times people just don't see us. I need to get a Megahorn, like Ty uses on EMHE. That will make me be heard! LOL

 

Have you ever thought about getting a safety flag. Go to ebay and you can find one on there. They are put on with hardware. Some cities require one for power chairs and scooters to use sidewalks.

[BeagleOne]

she announces that people need to watch their toes or I will run over them. She does the same thing when we get off. She walks behind me, where I cannot see her, and keeps repeating the toe warning to everyone. I hate it. I have asked her to stop. She wont.

 

You could announce in a loud voice that you have no idea who that rude woman behind you is, and people shouldn't listen to her. Maybe THAT would stop her. ;)

[katrina915]

I have suffered varying degrees of frustration on cruise ships with my 91 year old father in a wheelchair. My first night on the ship and first cruise I was asking guest relations if we could get off at 3 am. Anyways, I worked it out to go across non cabin floors to get to dinner. And in elevators to go up to get down. And to work out that we could be late for main dining room sitting. Elevators are the worst and we balanced humor with Dad waving a cane at people. I got so frustrated at people pushing in that I mentioned that the stairs were right around the corner. A twenty year old was the only one who said anything- that it was five flights DOWN. No adult corrected this child about not pushing the old feeble guy that I gave up on that group. Others are helpful-mostly other disabled and older folks.

 

There is supposed to be handicapped seating at shows, but it isn't usually enforced. We both prefer Shirley Temple reruns, so not a big problem there.

[tigercat]

I use a walker and have had difficulties getting into elevators on the ships but the worse was our last cruise. I waited for so many elevators I lost count. Finally a group of women came to the elevator area and saw what was happening. They were not young women but they blocked the area and said that until I got on no one else did either. The next elevator I was on. They were great.

As for looking into the handicapped room, I must admit I did look into one once. Not stick my head in but take a bit longer time walking by it. I wasn't trying to see if someone needed the room or not, I was just curious as to what it looked like and if I would need to use it sometime in the future.

tigercat

[DesrtDrmr]

I use a scooter and like a previous poster, we just get into an elevator going the opposite direction from most. If it's dinner, we go up in an empty elevator, and come down in a full one..........if people are going up for breakfast, we go down. We've found that only at meal times is elevator travel crowded, and after shows and muster. My husband usually stands close to the elevator doors after pushing the buttons and after allowing people to get out, he jumps (!) in and holds the door for me. Most folks notice him doing this and allow me to get in, scoot as far back as I can, and then they get on. We really have not had many problems with elevators. The worst is when we get in an empty one and someone has pushed ALL the buttons. Our last cruise, in March, had 500 kids on it, and we hardly knew they were there. It seemed that they all dressed for dinner and were polite and helpful. I even had a few 10-14 year olds ask me if I needed help in the buffet............and that was without their parents along to urge them to help. It was a great cruise, and we have found that a smile and/or a little joke goes a long way toward melting some of the crustier folks.

 

Tigercat, if a handicapped room would make your life easier go for it! The regular rooms have steps up into the bathroom and very little room for moving your walker/chair/scooter around. I have leg problems and the step up gives me big problems, plus the grab bars in the bathrooms are wonderful for steadying myself, especially if we have a bit of a rough sea. The entrance doors to cabin and bathroom are wider too, so you don't have to bang your walker into the sides of the doors. The shower has a fold down seat in it. If you are in a regular cabin and need a seat for the shower, they do have portable ones they will add to your shower upon request. You have to ask before you travel, to make sure that you have one of the limited supply. Also, on our last cruise, with a standard fixed shower head, our steward suggested, and had implemented, someone who came and replaced the fixed shower head with a hand held one. It was wonderful and so much easier since I could not stand long enough for a regular shower. Who knew they could do such wonderful things???? I haven't cruised other lines since becoming less mobile, but Princess is the BEST for being helpful! I don't know how many cruises I have left in me, but they are all going to be on Princess!!!

[rbyrd2531]

We had mostly good experiences...the elevators could be a challenge.

My partner is paraplegic and also has a mild brain injury. I have to ride with him on the elevators otherwise he will get lost:>)

 

I found teens and kids to be the most helpful (a surprise), followed by many nice elderly people. The 20-30 yr olds mainly didn't seem to want to be bothered with things like waiting their turn, etc. That is just our experience on our Princess cruise

The absolute rudest person was a lady in a scooter with another lady in a scooter who came around a corner as the elevators closed (we all had waited through several loadings) and yelled out we had to make room for them. When told there was no room she started yelling they shouldnt have to wait, etc. But then her voice was muffled after the door closed so I didn't hear the rest :>)

 

I would not take Princess again because after months of research and being told by CEO Buckaloo on his site there there was "no such policy that a person had to stand and move into the tender without assistance"

 

The night before we were to go to Belize, a paper in our box told us that only people who could stand and get into the boat without assistance could tender to Belize.

 

My partner didn't know and he was exhausted from the previous day so I just let him sleep and acted like we overslept.

 

It did not ruin our trip....I just don't like being lied to and Princess should stop this policy

Edited April 29, 2013 by rbyrd2531
spelling correction

[sanspike]

We had mostly good experiences...the elevators could be a challenge.

My partner is paraplegic and also has a mild brain injury. I have to ride with him on the elevators otherwise he will get lost:>)

 

I found teens and kids to be the most helpful (a surprise), followed by many nice elderly people. The 20-30 yr olds mainly didn't seem to want to be bothered with things like waiting their turn, etc. That is just our experience on our Princess cruise

The absolute rudest person was a lady in a scooter with another lady in a scooter who came around a corner as the elevators closed (we all had waited through several loadings) and yelled out we had to make room for them. When told there was no room she started yelling they shouldnt have to wait, etc. But then her voice was muffled after the door closed so I didn't hear the rest :>)

 

I would not take Princess again because after months of research and being told by CEO Buckaloo on his site there there was "no such policy that a person had to stand and move into the tender without assistance"

 

The night before we were to go to Belize, a paper in our box told us that only people who could stand and get into the boat without assistance could tender to Belize.

 

My partner didn't know and he was exhausted from the previous day so I just let him sleep and acted like we overslept.

 

It did not ruin our trip....I just don't like being lied to and Princess should stop this policy

 

Princess tendering policy is the reason we do not cruise with them. We cruise RCC. They have taken me in my wheelchair to places I would have thought they would not.

[rbyrd2531]

I was considering Royal Carribbean for next time and is good to know they are fair in their policies.

 

I noticed the wheelchair accessible balcony room and theaccessible suite was the same sq footage on the RC ship I was looking at. So unless the up charge for suite results in a lot of amenities we will probably aim for the accessible balcony :>)

 

thanks for your input!

[lmd4941977]

I always push DH to the other side of the ship from the crowd (away from MD at meal times/away from theatre after shows) via the promenade deck. On my 9/5/13 cruise on the Grandeur I had problems with rude elevators! I couldn't get DH to the elevator before it closed. Many people were very kind and held the elevator for us. The cruise was mostly seniors who may have been more aware of our situation. I guess I don't expect younger people to even notice us. They are excited to be cruising and usually have tunnel vision. Keep trying, there are lots of good people on the ship.

[Chunky2219]

I have three strategies:

 

• The rude ones, I generally ignore
  
• The pushy ones, I usually outwit or in extremis I'm happy to squeeze them out
  
• The armchair medics, who can diagnose a malingering fake from 40 paces get both barrels.
  

.

[Gittel]

People who are rude to the disabled are just ignorant. They have no idea of the difficulties disabled people face i.e when they walk backwards and fall into your lap and then turn round look surprised at seeing you and then accuse you of not looking where you were going. I then suggest that they get the eyes in the back of their head tested before they walk backwards again.

 

It always amazes me that complete strangers look at you and ask in an accusatory voice "what is wrong with you". "You don't look disabled". I usually reply "you dont look ignorant to me but you are being rude to ask someone you don't know what your illness is".

 

Also I had being petted on the head usually I then bark and say if they do that again I will bite. I do not appreciate being treated as a dog. They soon scurry off.

 

And as for getting in the elevators - usually I'm not in a hurry except when I need the ladies room - try to find the first disabled toilet I can find only to find the able-bodied using them and I can't help but ask them what their disability is that gives them the right to use it when all the other toilets are not being used. They look embarrassed and hurry away.

[raindropsalways]

Humor??? Is that some sort of weird joke? I have not ever heard of any culture that thinks it is funny to create burdens or hardships upon others or even jest about it.

 

Gee, sorry about the large print. Of course, if a person's vision is not up to your expectations will you do everything possible to make seeing more difficult for that person? No, I do not use a white cane and am not blind. However, my next eye surgery will probably be in December, at which time I will get new glasses again. The little credit-card size plastic magnifying glasses work wonders.

 

I realize that not everybody lives in a part of the world that is exceptionally beautiful, thus cannot brag. I'm sure if you look hard enough, you can find beautiful things where you live. It is so unfortunate that you were not able to see the beauty in Le Havre. I would love to be able to get to the Abbey of Graville.

 

Regardless, where a person lives or their cruise line status, it does not have anything to do with the price of onions in London. More specific in this case, rudeness. Being polite to a person's face does not matter if you actions create hardship or burdens upon them and then, try to pass it off as a joke?

 

< - > < - > < - > < - > < - > < - > < - > < - > < - > < - > < - > < - > < - > < - > < - >

 

 

In regards to this thread, many do not realize their actions may be considered rude. The factors that causes many of the problems are eye level, looking the other direction or so engrossed in conversation they did not realize anyone else was there. If there is a mishap, the majority apologize.

 

 

Betty

Edited September 18, 2013 by raindropsalways

[Chunky2219]

Humor??? Is that some sort of weird joke? I have not ever heard of any culture that thinks it is funny to create burdens or hardships upon others or even jest about it.

 

Gee, sorry about the large print. Of course, if a person's vision is not up to your expectations will you do everything possible to make seeing more difficult for that person? No, I do not use a white cane and am not blind. However, my next eye surgery will probably be in December, at which time I will get new glasses again. The little credit-card size plastic magnifying glasses work wonders.

 

I realize that not everybody lives in a part of the world that is exceptionally beautiful, thus cannot brag. I'm sure if you look hard enough, you can find beautiful things where you live. It is so unfortunate that you were not able to see the beauty in Le Havre. I would love to be able to get to the Abbey of Graville.

 

Regardless, where a person lives or their cruise line status, it does not have anything to do with the price of onions in London. More specific in this case, rudeness. Being polite to a person's face does not matter if you actions create hardship or burdens upon them and then, try to pass it off as a joke?

 

< - > < - > < - > < - > < - > < - > < - > < - > < - > < - > < - > < - > < - > < - > < - >

 

 

In regards to this thread, many do not realize their actions may be considered rude. The factors that causes many of the problems are eye level, looking the other direction or so engrossed in conversation they did not realize anyone else was there. If there is a mishap, the majority apologize.

 

Betty

Dear Betty,

 

I don't know where you get the "creation of burdens on others" from and for the life of me cannot work out how your head is working. I'm more than a little uncomfortable that you seem to have tracked down a load of my posts and are firing off random, irrational comments like a drunk at a shooting range. I feel like I'm being stalked and frankly, I'm rather pleased that there are several thousand miles between us.

 

I also cannot understand your rambling comments about type size and sight problems, because you've managed to read rather too much of what I've posted at a conventional text size. But if you really feel the need to shout, I suggest using capitals because they tell me it really gets attention.

 

I'm not sure if it's me or you who's supposed to be living in a beautiful part of the world, but the only way I can imagine anyone viewing the port of Le Havre that way is if they came from post-war East Germany and thought concrete is the only way to build. Maybe when you get there in October you'll come to a similar conclusion, maybe not. Either way, I don't care.

 

I'm not going to try to answer your discordant ramblings with explanations of anything I've posted. For the most part I try to do the same as most forum members and help others out with information or advice. Yes, on occasion I'm happy to poke a little fun at those who come riding in on their high horse to prognosticate on things. You came clip-clopping along and here's the result.

 

This would be the point in the post where normally I would apologise for any unintended offence. But since according you your own definition you are not one of the "majority", I'll pass on this occasion. I'd also probably sign off with a bon mot but you trouble me greatly and are best left to get on with seeing the world through a very strange prism.

 

Please leave me alone.

 

 

.

Edited September 19, 2013 by Chunky2219
typo

[redhotmermaid2]

People who are rude to the disabled are just ignorant. They have no idea of the difficulties disabled people face i.e when they walk backwards and fall into your lap and then turn round look surprised at seeing you and then accuse you of not looking where you were going. I then suggest that they get the eyes in the back of their head tested before they walk backwards again.

 

It always amazes me that complete strangers look at you and ask in an accusatory voice "what is wrong with you". "You don't look disabled". I usually reply "you dont look ignorant to me but you are being rude to ask someone you don't know what your illness is".

 

Also I had being petted on the head usually I then bark and say if they do that again I will bite. I do not appreciate being treated as a dog. They soon scurry off.

 

And as for getting in the elevators - usually I'm not in a hurry except when I need the ladies room - try to find the first disabled toilet I can find only to find the able-bodied using them and I can't help but ask them what their disability is that gives them the right to use it when all the other toilets are not being used. They look embarrassed and hurry away.

ilike you lol