Canada For Non-Canadians - Put Your Tips Here!

[spongerob]

TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN BRITISH COLUMBIA

1. Vancouver: 1.5 million people and two bridges. You do the math.

2. Your $400,000 Vancouver home is just 5 hours from downtown.

3. You can throw a rock and hit three Starbucks locations.

4. There's always some sort of deforestation protest going on.

5. Weed.

 

 

TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN ALBERTA

 

1. Big rock between you and BC.

2. Ottawa who?

3. Tax is 5% instead of the approximately 200% it is for the rest of the country.

4. You can exploit almost any natural resource you can think of.

5. You live in the only province that could actually afford to be its own country.

6. The Americans below you are all in anti-government militia groups.

 

 

TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN SASKATCHEWAN

 

1. You never run out of wheat.

2. Your province is really easy to draw.

3. You can watch the dog run away from home for hours.

4. People will assume you live on a farm.

 

 

TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN MANITOBA

 

1. You wake up one morning to find that you suddenly have a beachfront property.

2. Hundreds of huge, horribly frigid lakes.

3. Nothing compares to a wicked Winnipeg winter.

4. You can be an Easterner or a Westerner depending on your mood.

5. You can pass the time watching trucks and barns float by.

 

 

TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN ONTARIO

 

1. You live in the centre of the universe.

2. Your $400,000 Toronto home is actually a dump.

3. You and you alone decide who will win the federal election.

4. The only province with hard-core American-style crime.

 

 

TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN QUEBEC

 

1. Racism is socially acceptable.

2. You can take bets with your friends on which English neighbour will move out next.

3. Other provinces basically bribe you to stay in Canada.

4. You can blame all your problems on the "Anglo A*#!%!"

 

 

TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NEW BRUNSWICK

 

1. One way or another, the government gets 98% of your income.

2. You're poor, but not as poor as the Newfies.

3. No one ever blames anything on New Brunswick.

4. Everybody has a grandfather who runs a lighthouse.

 

 

TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NOVA SCOTIA

1. Everyone can play the fiddle. The ones who can't, think they can.

2. You can pretend to have Scottish heritage as an excuse to get drunk and wear a kilt.

3. You are the only reason Anne Murray makes money.

(Her first name is really Morna.)

 

TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN PRINCE EDWARD ISLAND

 

1. Even though more people live on Vancouver Island, you still got the big, new bridge.

2. You can walk across the province in half an hour.

3. You can drive across the province in two minutes.

4. Everyone has been an extra on "Road to Avonlea."

5. This is where all those tiny, red potatoes come from.

6. You can confuse ships by turning your porch lights on and off at night.

 

 

TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NEWFOUNDLAND

 

1. If Quebec separates, you will float off to sea.

2. If you do something stupid, you have a built-in excuse.

3. The workday is about two hours long.

4. It is socially acceptable to wear your hip waders to your wedding.

 

 

Canadians are a rare breed, indeed.

 

[Captain Canuck]

..she has the NEW hip waders

[Kamloops50]

TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN BRITISH COLUMBIA

1. Vancouver: 1.5 million people and two bridges. You do the math.

2. Your $400,000 Vancouver home is just 5 hours from downtown.

3. You can throw a rock and hit three Starbucks locations.

4. There's always some sort of deforestation protest going on.

5. Weed.

6. The best year round weather in the country

7. 2010 Winter Olympics etc

8. Largest Chinatown in Canada

9 The best place to live (Kamloops - my home)

 

TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN ALBERTA

 

1. Big rock between you and BC.

2. Ottawa who?

3. Tax is 5% instead of the approximately 200% it is for the rest of the country.

4. You can exploit almost any natural resource you can think of.

5. You live in the only province that could actually afford to be its own country.

6. The Americans below you are all in anti-government militia groups.

 

 

TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN SASKATCHEWAN

 

1. You never run out of wheat.

2. Your province is really easy to draw.

3. You can watch the dog run away from home for hours.

4. People will assume you live on a farm.

 

 

TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN MANITOBA

 

1. You wake up one morning to find that you suddenly have a beachfront property.

2. Hundreds of huge, horribly frigid lakes.

3. Nothing compares to a wicked Winnipeg winter.

4. You can be an Easterner or a Westerner depending on your mood.

5. You can pass the time watching trucks and barns float by.

 

 

TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN ONTARIO

 

1. You live in the centre of the universe.

2. Your $400,000 Toronto home is actually a dump.

3. You and you alone decide who will win the federal election.

4. The only province with hard-core American-style crime.

 

 

TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN QUEBEC

 

1. Racism is socially acceptable.

2. You can take bets with your friends on which English neighbour will move out next.

3. Other provinces basically bribe you to stay in Canada.

4. You can blame all your problems on the "Anglo A*#!%!"

 

 

TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NEW BRUNSWICK

 

1. One way or another, the government gets 98% of your income.

2. You're poor, but not as poor as the Newfies.

3. No one ever blames anything on New Brunswick.

4. Everybody has a grandfather who runs a lighthouse.

 

 

TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NOVA SCOTIA

1. Everyone can play the fiddle. The ones who can't, think they can.

2. You can pretend to have Scottish heritage as an excuse to get drunk and wear a kilt.

3. You are the only reason Anne Murray makes money.

(Her first name is really Morna.)

 

TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN PRINCE EDWARD ISLAND

 

1. Even though more people live on Vancouver Island, you still got the big, new bridge.

2. You can walk across the province in half an hour.

3. You can drive across the province in two minutes.

4. Everyone has been an extra on "Road to Avonlea."

5. This is where all those tiny, red potatoes come from.

6. You can confuse ships by turning your porch lights on and off at night.

 

 

TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NEWFOUNDLAND

 

1. If Quebec separates, you will float off to sea.

2. If you do something stupid, you have a built-in excuse.

3. The workday is about two hours long.

4. It is socially acceptable to wear your hip waders to your wedding.

 

 

Canadians are a rare breed, indeed.

 

Just added a few to British Columbia . As you guessed I live in

 

Kamloops BC

[Ephraim]

I'm sure we can all add to the list to personalize it. For example

 

TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN QUEBEC

 

1. Racism is socially acceptable.

2. You can take bets with your friends on which English neighbour will move out next.

3. Other provinces basically bribe you to stay in Canada.

4. You can blame all your problems on the "Anglo A*#!%!"

 

5. You can speak more than one language

6. You can actually get good food, good coffee, good drink and good friends.

7. Your wife/husband has a different last name even if you aren't in a same-sex marriage.

8. Style and fashion are almost natural.

9. You have drug insurance, subsidized day care and paid parental leave.

10. You have a sex life.

[dtracker]

Just in case you get involved in sports conversations, here's a quick glossary of Canadian sports terms:

 

Habs (short for "Les Habitants"), Le Bleu-Blanc-et-Rouge (the Blue, White & Red): Nicknames for the Montreal Canadiens hockey team

Leafs, Buds: Nicknames for Toronto Maple Leafs (another hockey team, longtime rivals of Les Habs)

Icing, boarding, slapshot, wrist shot, spin-o-rama, hip check, cannonading drive, neutral zone trap, power play, five-on-four, five-on-three, five-hole, short side, deke, Stanley Cup: all hockey terms. Just nod as if you understand.

Raps: Toronto Raptors (basketball)

Jays: Toronto Blue Jays (MLB - American East Division)

CFL: Canadian Football League. Played on a longer, wider field than American football, one more player per team, anyone in the backfield can move before the snap, in overtime each team gets a chance to scrimmage from the 35 and score, no fair catch rule, only three downs so much more pass-oriented than the American game, game can't end without a play even if clock counts down to zero before the snap, the prize at the end of the season is the Grey Cup

Argos, Boatmen: Toronto Argonauts (Canadian football)

Argooooooooooos: Called out in any sports arena when the action gets boring. To fans of the Argos, this means "I would rather be watching the Argos." To all other Canadians, this means, "Looooosers."

Bonspiel: a curling tournament with a lot of serious alcohol consumption.

Hurry hard: What you hear during bonspiels. The captain of the team is telling his underlings to sweep harder in an effort to make the curling stone glide straighter.

 

Hockey especially has a grammar and syntax all its own--two guys can "talk hockey" over a couple of double doubles, and the only words a non-hockey person will understand are "the", "a/an", and "eh".

 

Hi, Pepperwood.

Do you or anyone else know if they have curling events or tournaments in Halifax or Quebec City during October? Thanks.

 

Duane

[Putterdude]

Robertson screws Screws (for metal or wood) with a square hole in the top rather than a straight or X-shaped one. They'd be popular in the States except that Henry Ford wanted exclusive rights to them, and Robertson (the inventor, a Canadian) refused to sell.

 

Ok, you have taught me something....it is not quite what I learned from my father many years ago....but makes a lot of sense. I have to look hard and long for Robertson screws here in AZ and often just bring them with me from home. If Americans only knew what they were missing by not using Robertson they would move from the Phillips screw in a heartbeat.:D

[Pepperwood]

Hi, Pepperwood.

Do you or anyone else know if they have curling events or tournaments in Halifax or Quebec City during October? Thanks.

 

Duane

 

Just about every curling club across the country has some sort of bonspiel in October to start the season. However, I'm not sure when the big cash bonspiels and tournaments get started. Hopefully someone in Halifax or Quebec will respond to this.

[Captain Canuck]

apparrently they had an issue with me throwing rocks overhand

[Colakid]

Having just found this thread I find it amusing being a Canadian all my life living and working in Ontario. I see no one mentioned our great Canadian Tire stores or Zellers. One thing I found amusing visiting BC last fall was I was called an "easterner". I told them I was not from the east coast but from Ontario and the reply was anyone east of the rockies is an "easterner". Never thought of it that way. In my small community of 7500 people we pay for our water on our "hydro bill". It is metered for consumption and about 35% more added as a sewer tax. Imagine that!!!

 

Colakid.

[scottbee]

Having just found this thread I find it amusing being a Canadian all my life living and working in Ontario. I see no one mentioned our great Canadian Tire stores or Zellers. One thing I found amusing visiting BC last fall was I was called an "easterner". I told them I was not from the east coast but from Ontario and the reply was anyone east of the rockies is an "easterner". Never thought of it that way. In my small community of 7500 people we pay for our water on our "hydro bill". It is metered for consumption and about 35% more added as a sewer tax. Imagine that!!!

 

In most provinces in Canada, your HYDRO bill is refers to your electricity bill, as most of the power is generated with Hydro electric generation. Confusing for those people that thing HYDRO=WATER.

[Captain Canuck]

..the thought that I as an Albertan can be considered an eastener never crossed my mind....may have to snuff myself...but we beat the Leafs so I do have a reason to live

[Urban trekker]

Well you are east of Vancouver so what are we suppose to call you and we beat the Leafs as well - in fact many teams beat the Leafs.

 

Okay here's a question for you - what is the easternmost state in the USA.

 

Cheers

 

Dennis

[Captain Canuck]

but I cheated and googled

[Ephraim]

Well you are east of Vancouver so what are we suppose to call you and we beat the Leafs as well - in fact many teams beat the Leafs.

 

Okay here's a question for you - what is the easternmost state in the USA.

 

Cheers

 

Dennis

 

What do you call $53 million dollars worth of employees watching the Stanley Cup on TV?

 

The Toronto Maple Leafs.

[Urban trekker]

Actually Maine is the wrong answer - the answer is Alaska - and here's why - the Aleutian Islands extend across the international dateline therefore they are considered to be east thereby making that state the easternmost state - it is also the northernmost and westernmost state as well - picked up that piece of trivia on a Amtrak train ride - during some of there wine tasting sessions they have trivia questions with the winners getting the remainder of the open bottles for their drinking pleasure.

 

So the Flames can't even beat the Thrashers a city they left some 28 years ago.

 

Cheers

 

Dennis

[Captain Canuck]

thats actually what google answered

[aliaschief]

Just a word of thanks. The information from this blog has really helped in planning our two Canada cruises this year. We have also enjoyed the great humor. Keep up the good work.

[Polar Bear Mom]

I order medium decaf black at Tim's. I have never had a problem of the cup not being full. Often it is too full. My daughter works at Tim's and they prefer you to order the size and then how you want it. The employees have head phones so noise from the counter does not bother them plus they are in a different area.

[Polar Bear Mom]

Back to Tim's. I help at their Camp Day so I have done these things. The milk and sugar is put in the cup before the coffee. If you want cream instead of milk mention it when you place your order. If you want sweetener instead of sugar, again mention it when you order.

[dizliz]

This is just the BEST thread!:D Thanks so much for all the info and good humor...humour?

 

Being from northern Ohio...which is just across Lake Erie from Canada....we have Tim Hortons and vinegar is provided along with ketchup for french fries here. It must be a malt vinegar as it is dark in color. Hmmm...gonna have to go to Five Guys and get their yummy french fries and read the vinegar bottle.:D

[librarycin]

Bunny Hug - A hoodie in the Prairies.

 

Whew! 8 pages! That's a long thread, and I wanted to read through it all before I said anything, as I didn't want to repeat anyone else.

 

So, after 8 pages, this is the one thing I remembered I wanted to comment on! "Bunnyhug" is really only used in Saskatchewan. I couldn't say for sure about Manitoba, but I'm pretty sure it's only Sask. I grew up there, but have lived in Alberta for almost 20 years (but will always call it a "bunnyhug"!). People in Alberta only know what you are talking about if they know someone from Sask - to them, it's a "hoodie".

 

I think I can post a picture somehow, can't I? Let's see...

Shoot! You can't see what it says, but it actually defines "bunnyhug" on the front of it! I have one! Love it! :D

[Lvteks]

Thanks to all of correspondents. If I actually learned everything here, what degree would be granted? It is so inclusive with strong cultural focus that would be difficult to aquire in such a short time. Will keep following til we sail in Sept. Really fun!

 

Blessing,

 

Gail

[urbanhawk]

Very much looking forward to my visit to Canada in Sept. Anybody know if there are Chase Bank ATMs in Saint John, or Halifax, or Quebec City? :confused: Thanks.

[Ephraim]

Since there are no Chase banks.... there are no Chase bank ATMs. I'm afraid you will just have to use a Canadian Bank's ATM, like the Royal Bank or the Bank of Montreal.

 

As far as I know, Chase only runs a credit card business in Canada, issuing cards for Best Buy, Marriott and Sears.

[urbanhawk]

Thanks, Ephram, for providing me with the info I needed to know-very much appreciated.:cool: