Distributing Ashes at Sea; Our Experience

[Caribensun]

Pam, I really appreciate you taking time to write this. I have been wondering how this can be done. I am glad Princess was helpful and it was a very nice moment for you and your family. Again, I am sorry for your loss.

[sassyredhat]

Thanks, Pam, for sharing this. We want this for us too.

And thanks also, for all your posts. I always read them. You do have alot of experience and I appreciate that.

Pat

[flimflubin]

Many of you followed my thread from a year ago when my brother-in-law got sick while on the Coral Princess and subsequently passed away. He wanted to be cremated and sent out to sea, so we planned a family cruise on the January 5-15, 2011 Sapphire Princess, and I arranged with Princess to distribute his ashes.

 

The purpose of this thread is to provide information for those who might be considering this. It's illegal to do this on your own without permission or within 12 miles of the U.S. so please keep this in mind if you respond.

 

On April 16, 2010, I faxed my request to the Princess Marine Department, 661-753-0214, and included my full name, booking #, cruise # and date, cabin #, phone # and email address. I received an email response on April 19th from Janine Curry, Secretary to Alan Wilson, Vice President, Marine Operations, with the approval and a letter which I've copied below:

 

"Thank you for your request to spread ashes while at sea during your cruise onboard the Sapphire Princess, cruise #H102N, commencing January 5, 2011.

 

"We would like to inform you of the following:

 

* Ashes must be contained in a biodegradable urn

* Ashes/Flowers may only be spread in International waters

* In accordance with environmental laws, only ashes, biodegradeable urns and biodegradeable flowers are permitted to be spread overboard. Cards, paper, metals, plastics and other non-biodegradeable items are not permitted.

* Our ships do not employ a Chaplain

 

"The ship will be notified of your request and you shall be contacted while onboard. You will be informed of an appropriate time to carry out the spreading of the ashes. A member of the ship's company will escort you to a suitable private location and stay with you during this time."

 

Once onboard, I went down to the Passenger Services Desk with a copy of the above letter. Naturally, no one at Princess had notified the ship, but not to worry. I received a call from Trent, from Customer Service, the next morning and he told me he would check with the navigator to find out what days and times would be possible. He called me back the next morning to say that any time our third sea day on our way to Acapulco would be fine. After conferring with my sister, we set a time of 11am.

 

We all arrived at the Passenger Services Desk at about 10:45am and were met by Manuel, who was going to help us. He had arranged for a gorgeous flower arrangement (at no cost) for us to toss with the ashes and led us up to deck 7 aft. He had two crew members stationed on both sides of the ship who closed off the back of Promenade deck after we passed by. We went to the very back of the ship and had a few quiet moments while my nephew opened the box and then sent Jim's ashes out to sea. I followed with the wreath. We stayed there for about 10 minutes, each wrapped in our own thoughts and memories. It was very short and simple.

 

Princess couldn't have been more supportive or sympathetic. They were respectful, and it was just the way my brother-in-law would have wanted it, and my sister was comfortable with.

 

The above is not for everyone, obviously, but in case this is yours or your loved one's wishes, I wanted to share.

 

Here is a photo of the gorgeous wreath. My sister wanted to keep it and take it back to her cabin. :) It was too beautiful to toss.

 

 

Pam, thank you for sharing your personal moment with us. Your brother-in-law was smiling down! Thank you again.

[StLouisCruisers]

Pam, I'm so glad I got to read about this ceremony, and it brought me to tears. DH says this is what he would like me to do after he is gone, so we've been discussing where. Roundtrip LA to Hawaii sounds perfect!

 

Thanks so much for posting it!

[NUGal]

Thanks so much, Pam, for sharing this information. I have informed my family that this is what I want done when the time comes. I have always loved cruising, and I refer to this as The Final Cruise.

[mycruz]

Thanks Pam, as expected, Princess really did a great job in fulfilling your BIL and his family's wishes.

 

As always, a great post with great information. - Mary

[cruzinchris]

Thank you for sharing this information in your poignant post, Pam. Thoughts and prayers were with you on your family voyage.

Chris and Mike in Michigan

[Whimsy]

Thank you for sharing your experience.

[seacloud2]

Pam,

May you and your family continue to be consoled with precious memories

of your brother. It is good that you were able to honor his

desires.

[ssbeagle]

Many of you followed my thread from a year ago when my brother-in-law got sick while on the Coral Princess and subsequently passed away. He wanted to be cremated and sent out to sea, so we planned a family cruise on the January 5-15, 2011 Sapphire Princess, and I arranged with Princess to distribute his ashes.

 

The purpose of this thread is to provide information for those who might be considering this. It's illegal to do this on your own without permission or within 12 miles of the U.S. so please keep this in mind if you respond.

 

On April 16, 2010, I faxed my request to the Princess Marine Department, 661-753-0214, and included my full name, booking #, cruise # and date, cabin #, phone # and email address. I received an email response on April 19th from Janine Curry, Secretary to Alan Wilson, Vice President, Marine Operations, with the approval and a letter which I've copied below:

 

"Thank you for your request to spread ashes while at sea during your cruise onboard the Sapphire Princess, cruise #H102N, commencing January 5, 2011.

 

"We would like to inform you of the following:

 

* Ashes must be contained in a biodegradable urn

* Ashes/Flowers may only be spread in International waters

* In accordance with environmental laws, only ashes, biodegradeable urns and biodegradeable flowers are permitted to be spread overboard. Cards, paper, metals, plastics and other non-biodegradeable items are not permitted.

* Our ships do not employ a Chaplain

 

"The ship will be notified of your request and you shall be contacted while onboard. You will be informed of an appropriate time to carry out the spreading of the ashes. A member of the ship's company will escort you to a suitable private location and stay with you during this time."

 

Once onboard, I went down to the Passenger Services Desk with a copy of the above letter. Naturally, no one at Princess had notified the ship, but not to worry. I received a call from Trent, from Customer Service, the next morning and he told me he would check with the navigator to find out what days and times would be possible. He called me back the next morning to say that any time our third sea day on our way to Acapulco would be fine. After conferring with my sister, we set a time of 11am.

 

We all arrived at the Passenger Services Desk at about 10:45am and were met by Manuel, who was going to help us. He had arranged for a gorgeous flower arrangement (at no cost) for us to toss with the ashes and led us up to deck 7 aft. He had two crew members stationed on both sides of the ship who closed off the back of Promenade deck after we passed by. We went to the very back of the ship and had a few quiet moments while my nephew opened the box and then sent Jim's ashes out to sea. I followed with the wreath. We stayed there for about 10 minutes, each wrapped in our own thoughts and memories. It was very short and simple.

 

Princess couldn't have been more supportive or sympathetic. They were respectful, and it was just the way my brother-in-law would have wanted it, and my sister was comfortable with.

 

The above is not for everyone, obviously, but in case this is yours or your loved one's wishes, I wanted to share.

 

Here is a photo of the gorgeous wreath. My sister wanted to keep it and take it back to her cabin. :) It was too beautiful to toss.

 

 

Pam, thank you for posting this. It was my dad's wish that his ashes be spread at sea along with my mother's once she passes on. He passed away several years ago. So in the future this information will come in very handy for us. I am really sorry to hear what happened to your brother-in-law but it is nice to know Princess took care of your family in this way.

[tennisobo]

Thank-you so much, Pam, for sharing this with all of us. This is probably the best thread on all of Cruise Critic.

 

I'm so sorry your family had to experience the loss of your brother-in-law. It sounds like you have been able to come together in a unique way to honor him. I will be sharing this thread with my family.

 

Very sincerely,

[bjkTX]

I remember a few years back reading a thread about the possibility of doing this, but like most posts it had 50 saying you could, and 50 saying you couldn't - so it's great information for those who may need it in the future.

 

Thanks for sharing - and sorry for your loss.

[LoveThisCruisingThing]

Thank you Pam for sharing this. While reading, I had tears in my eyes. You described everything perfectly. You have described another option for me while planning for the future.

I read your original post about your brother in law. I know your sister misses her husband terribly and I hope she is doing well as well as your family.

[BoardwalkBabe]

Thank you for sharing this information as it is truly what I would like for myself.

[caber]

Thank you this information, Pam.

I am sure your BIL would have been happy with this.

[Raamo]

Thank you for sharing Pam,

 

This puts a nice bookend on the events that started on that Sea day a year ago on the Coral.

 

I'm glad we got to meet both you and your sister and hope we'll run into you again on a future cruise.

[Northender]

Pam, thank you for this post. What a wonderful tribute to your Brother In Law. :)

[Rayefan]

This is JUST what I was searching for today as our sweet father, a retired Navy man of 25+ years, passed away last night and always wanted to go on a real cruise! I am now going to make sure he has this dream.

 

Thank You for sharing....

[Pam in CA]

This puts a nice bookend on the events that started on that Sea day a year ago on the Coral.

 

I'm glad we got to meet both you and your sister and hope we'll run into you again on a future cruise.

Brian, thank you. Nancy and I really enjoyed meeting you and your wife and hope to cruise with you again. She's busy knitting and needlepointing Christmas stockings for her soon-to-be "instant" grandchildren (when her son gets married in the Fall.)

 

This is JUST what I was searching for today as our sweet father, a retired Navy man of 25+ years, passed away last night and always wanted to go on a real cruise! I am now going to make sure he has this dream.

Thank you and all the others who have responded. I'm so sorry to hear about your father and glad the information was of help. When my BIL passed away, we weren't sure how to go about distributing his ashes at sea as he requested and going out in a friend's boat didn't feel like the right thing to do. We literally put him on the shelf until we figured it out and once we did, we knew this was the perfect solution... for him.

[marigail]

I also followed this last year. Thank you for sharing your experience with us. I, too, read it with a tear in my eye, but how special to have your last request honored and in such a respectful fashion. God bless you all.

[wishful thinking]

I can't believe you've posted this thread just when I needed it. I followed your events and was very emotional. At the time my beloved hubby was recovering from cancer treatment. Long story short, we booked a B2B2B on the Emerald Princess for 7, 17 and 27 April of this year. I had booked our son and daughter to join us on 17 April as a surprise. We had to tell him at Christmas because he became poorly and we wanted him to have something to 'get him through'. He made me promise that whatever happened we would still go on 17 April. Sadly he passed away on 22 January. I made him a promise that he WOULD go to the sunshine. My son has been on to Princess UK for nearly 3 hours today trying to sort it all out. They have cancelled our 7 and 27 April cruises (obviously we've lost our deposits - but knew that this would happen). However, my son's partner who is from the US is staying with us at this time. She flew in on Christmas Day to be here with us (was very close to my hubby). My son tried to book her on the cruise instead of my dear hubby and Princess are not playing nice at the moment. Said it wasn't possible as she had a US passport. They are also both ex employees of Princess. Go figure. Be assured I WILL get there somehow even if it means paying for the cruise all over again. Would dearly love to be on the Emerald as originally planned. It would have been our Emerald Wedding Anniversary in April, hence the reason we chose the Emerald Princess. We too want to scatter his ashes into the sea. I truly hope and pray Princess UK can pull out all the stops and make this happen for us all. Sorry to vent but am a bit emotional and raw at the moment.

[Pam in CA]

Wishful thinking, I'm so very, very sorry to hear about your husband. I hope everything works out and you're able to take him on his "final voyage." My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family

[wishful thinking]

Wishful thinking, I'm so very, very sorry to hear about your husband. I hope everything works out and you're able to take him on his "final voyage." My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family

 

Thanks so much Pam. Hope we can get it sorted. Keep up your good work. You are a mine of information :D

[wishful thinking]

Wishful thinking, I'm so very, very sorry to hear about your husband. I hope everything works out and you're able to take him on his "final voyage." My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family

 

Hi Pam. Everything now sorted out. We ARE going as planned. Kudos to Princess :)

[The Wilkies]

Thanks Pam, that was beautiful and so special for you and your family.

 

I told my husband many years ago that he would go "off the back" of a ship whilst I was enjoying a world cruise!!!! Won't tell you where he says my ashes will go, but garbage has something to do with it.

 

Its so good to hear positive news of special customer service amongst all the moans on this site.

 

Gillian