GASP .... We're Ready to Give Up Formal

[Hobbsey]

Thanks for this post.

Our next cruise is Nieuw Amsterdam and we're torn about continuing with the tux etc

 

Now you've given a new perspective. We'd feel bad if we left the formal clothes home and many were dressed formal.

 

Drat...... back on the fence again. :D

Should we or shouldn't we? :)

 

Sail,

 

I travel with a dark blue or black suit, two dress shirts, two ties and an alternate pair of dress slacks (usually camel). The slacks from the suit and the alternate pair also serve on smart casual nights with a nice button shirt or dressier polo. The only items from the "elegant" outfit that do not get reused are the back dress shoes and the ties. Even the suit jacket serves on the more casual nights if I feel I need some protection from the AC.

[3rdGenCunarder]

I have no problem adhering to formal night dress code; however, I have another question:

 

My jewelry is strictly costume.:o Will I be banished to the Lido?:rolleyes:;)

 

No. Just don't wave it around and shock your fellow passengers. :D

[bellebaby]

I have to admit that I really DON'T like dressing up for formal night. That said, I would never even consider showing up in the MDR dressed less than what is requested by HAL! If it says formal night, I'll either dress formal or (on very rare occasion) choose to eat in the Lido or (even more rarely) opt for room service.

 

I'm happy to say that on all my cruises, I've never had someone else at my table dress inappropriately. People who choose to ignore the dress "request" show a lack of consideration, not only for Holland America, but also for their fellow cruisers. But then we're now living in a "me first" generation where people seem to think the rules are for everyone but themselves.

 

Sad! :(

 

It appears that we think alike except that our inclination for formal dressing depends on the cruise itinerary. If it's port intensive, we might skip formal nights. If the ship is the destination, we're more relaxed and have more time to enjoy shipboard activites.

 

However, if we decide not to participate in formal night activities, we either eat a late lunch, dine in the Lido or have room service. We also try to restrict our "appearance" in the common areas in casual wear. It's only fair to let those trying to enjoy a formal atmosphere do just that!

 

B

[mathteacher1980]

I am about to go on my third cruise. The first two were with carnival and this one will be with HAL on the Veendam.

 

I am a 30 year female teacher and all of the clothes I own are at home casual or work cloths. I went out and bought some nicer summer clothes for the cruise. My only concern is Formal Night. I want to go because its always such a nice sit down meal and both of our sea days have formal nights. Unfortunately (or fortunately really) I am a rule follower. When I think formal I think gowns. I am a biggg girl. And a short big girl at that. Finding an off the rack gown for someone like me is not a simple task. Believe me, I've been trying for years.

 

I would never even dream of showing up in jeans or shorts and a t-shirt. I do have very nice dress pants and some nice blouses and I wonder if that is ok. It seemed fine on Carnival but HAL seems so much more formal. I don't want to piss anyone off. Was going to just make reservations at the steakhouse or the Italian place but the steakhouse seems to be closed both formal nights.

 

Any comments? suggestions? I find it better to ask now .. my mom (60) is the same as me... only she is not a big girl but still feels intimidated by formal wear and tends to wear slacks and blouses.

[SilverDollarDoll]

Not to be argumentative because in general I agree with you, but airline baggage fees are more like $25-30 each direction, which means that for an extra suitcase, one has to spend $50-60 extra for the trip. We are a family of 5, which means an extra $250-$290 per trip if we took an extra suitcase for everybody. That is a lot of money for us. :D

 

 

I'm sorry, I disagree. If you are five and each has their own suitcase, then one additional suitcase would hold "dress up" clothes for the five of you. No one here would stoop to think that because you bring a fancy dress/suit or whatever you need an additional suitcase. Sorry, doesn't make any sense to me.

[Skipper's Mom]

I am about to go on my third cruise. The first two were with carnival and this one will be with HAL on the Veendam.

 

I am a 30 year female teacher and all of the clothes I own are at home casual or work cloths. I went out and bought some nicer summer clothes for the cruise. My only concern is Formal Night. I want to go because its always such a nice sit down meal and both of our sea days have formal nights. Unfortunately (or fortunately really) I am a rule follower. When I think formal I think gowns. I am a biggg girl. And a short big girl at that. Finding an off the rack gown for someone like me is not a simple task. Believe me, I've been trying for years.

 

I would never even dream of showing up in jeans or shorts and a t-shirt. I do have very nice dress pants and some nice blouses and I wonder if that is ok. It seemed fine on Carnival but HAL seems so much more formal. I don't want to piss anyone off. Was going to just make reservations at the steakhouse or the Italian place but the steakhouse seems to be closed both formal nights.

 

Any comments? suggestions? I find it better to ask now .. my mom (60) is the same as me... only she is not a big girl but still feels intimidated by formal wear and tends to wear slacks and blouses.

 

I, too, am a full-figured girl. I do wear elegant clothes on formal nights. Nothing spectacular but, all in all, nicely done. Nice dressy black slacks with a glittery top are acceptable. I usually pack several dressy tops and that's it. Frankly, no one notices what you wear or keeps track. And, should they do so, so what? You'll probably never see them again. Go, have a good time, and don't worry so much.

[SilverDollarDoll]

I understand your thoughts. Even though our last cruise did have a higher percent of true formal, we also saw what you describe. We were waiting to be seated and the couple in front of us were dressed in jeans. After the waiter left to take them to their table I asked the manager when they started letting people come to formal dinner in jeans, he said, "we won't do that":rolleyes:. I told him he just had. To be honest, we are just starting to get tired of going through the efforts when others don't. When we don't dress for formal, we eat in Lido, others don't seem to have the same consideration.

 

Kirk

 

 

Don't get "tired"....that's the problem...when people give in we all suffer. Look at the big corporations that have had to change "casual Friday" back to some other words because "casual" meant flip-flops, torn clothes etc. We have to admit that slobs will always be slobs, sailing or at home. I like and agree with your attitude of eating in the Lido and not MDR on formal nights.

[mathteacher1980]

I' date=' too, am a full-figured girl. I do wear elegant clothes on formal nights. Nothing spectacular but, all in all, nicely done. Nice dressy black slacks with a glittery top are acceptable. I usually pack several dressy tops and that's it. Frankly, no one notices what you wear or keeps track. And, should they do so, so what? You'll probably never see them again. Go, have a good time, and don't worry so much.[/quote']

 

Thanks :)

[Two@Sea]

I have no problem adhering to formal night dress code; however, I have another question:

 

My jewelry is strictly costume.:o Will I be banished to the Lido?:rolleyes:;)

 

I never met you in person... but now I would like to! :D

[Amuse Bouche]

I am about to go on my third cruise. The first two were with carnival and this one will be with HAL on the Veendam.

 

I am a 30 year female teacher and all of the clothes I own are at home casual or work cloths. I went out and bought some nicer summer clothes for the cruise. My only concern is Formal Night. I want to go because its always such a nice sit down meal and both of our sea days have formal nights. Unfortunately (or fortunately really) I am a rule follower. When I think formal I think gowns. I am a biggg girl. And a short big girl at that. Finding an off the rack gown for someone like me is not a simple task. Believe me, I've been trying for years.

 

I would never even dream of showing up in jeans or shorts and a t-shirt. I do have very nice dress pants and some nice blouses and I wonder if that is ok. It seemed fine on Carnival but HAL seems so much more formal. I don't want to piss anyone off. Was going to just make reservations at the steakhouse or the Italian place but the steakhouse seems to be closed both formal nights.

 

Any comments? suggestions? I find it better to ask now .. my mom (60) is the same as me... only she is not a big girl but still feels intimidated by formal wear and tends to wear slacks and blouses.

 

 

No one will get pissed off. I think the issue discussed here is more about grooming than the actual style of nice clothes. Well, except for the tux/suit debate, but really, if a man is charming, who's going to care if he's wearing a bowtie or a necktie ;)

 

I'm a tight 16, and short, so more round. I have found very lovely formal looking black skirts and pair those with very festive tops. I find them at Macy's and Lane Bryant. A lot of them seem to be for older women, but you can really make something look younger with accessories and hair. A beautiful skirt and a sparkly or satin blouse gives the same look as a gown, without worrying about what's shifted underneath.

 

Thanks for the frank post. It's nice to talk about a real issue, as opposed to how much the jewelry we wear is worth.

 

Enjoy your formal night and feel great, because you are going to be beautiful

[iancal]

We do not attend MDR on formal nights very often any more.

 

But if we do, we usually wear about $51,000. worth of jewelry.

[sail7seas]

I am about to go on my third cruise. The first two were with carnival and this one will be with HAL on the Veendam.

 

I am a 30 year female teacher and all of the clothes I own are at home casual or work cloths. I went out and bought some nicer summer clothes for the cruise. My only concern is Formal Night. I want to go because its always such a nice sit down meal and both of our sea days have formal nights. Unfortunately (or fortunately really) I am a rule follower. When I think formal I think gowns. I am a biggg girl. And a short big girl at that. Finding an off the rack gown for someone like me is not a simple task. Believe me, I've been trying for years.

 

I would never even dream of showing up in jeans or shorts and a t-shirt. I do have very nice dress pants and some nice blouses and I wonder if that is ok. It seemed fine on Carnival but HAL seems so much more formal. I don't want to piss anyone off. Was going to just make reservations at the steakhouse or the Italian place but the steakhouse seems to be closed both formal nights.

 

Any comments? suggestions? I find it better to ask now .. my mom (60) is the same as me... only she is not a big girl but still feels intimidated by formal wear and tends to wear slacks and blouses.

 

 

By all means, you'll be fine in the Main Dining Room with nice black dress pants and pretty top. Put on a pump or strappy sandal and enjoy yourself. :) You'll look just fine, dahhhhling. ;)

 

Pinnacle (steakhouse) and Cannaletto are both open on formal nights. Same dress code in suggested for Pinnacle though you could be 'less dressy' for Canaletto as it is part of Lido. You need reservations for both of those venues.

[SJSULIBRARIAN]

I agree - black pants and a dressy top - lacy, spangly, or colorful will be perfect for formal nights mathteacher1980. Go and enjoy yourself.

[RuthC]

I am a biggg girl. And a short big girl at that. Finding an off the rack gown for someone like me is not a simple task. Believe me, I've been trying for years.

Try Catherine's. They have some lovely Special Occasion dresses that are youthful looking. Lots of them are light-weight, too, so they're easy to pack.

[mathteacher1980]

Thank you all so much for your responses! My mother and I will feel more comfortable going in.

 

And thank you for the suggestions as well. I have been in The Avenue, Lane Bryant, Fashion Bug, Sears, JC Penny and every other store in this retail Mecca that I live in, far too many times to count... I have an oddly proportioned frame and would have to have anything I purchased tailored. I know, I know, whats $80 on a dress and $20 on alterations for a cruise that cost $800.... But for something that I would probably never wear again I just cant justify it. I would sooner eat in Lido. But that is why I really wanted to ask. Since pants and a dressy blouse seem to be acceptable (even if not by 100%), my mom and I will gladly go in that direction.

[SilverDollarDoll]

Thank you all so much for your responses! My mother and I will feel more comfortable going in.

 

And thank you for the suggestions as well. I have been in The Avenue, Lane Bryant, Fashion Bug, Sears, JC Penny and every other store in this retail Mecca that I live in, far too many times to count... I have an oddly proportioned frame and would have to have anything I purchased tailored. I know, I know, whats $80 on a dress and $20 on alterations for a cruise that cost $800.... But for something that I would probably never wear again I just cant justify it. I would sooner eat in Lido. But that is why I really wanted to ask. Since pants and a dressy blouse seem to be acceptable (even if not by 100%), my mom and I will gladly go in that direction.

 

You sound like a person I'd love to have sitting at my table on Formal Night with whatever you feel comfortable in. You are right in considering a pair of (black) pants and a top with a bit of sparkle or simply a plain black top. You can dress it up or down. Something like that can be worn to lots of places after the cruise. You could get lots of wear out of it. One piece of jewelry would look fabulous on solid black. Don't worry about dollar value, just maybe a simple piece of something that sparkles from "Tarje" or "Penays". There are some beautiful slinky (no wrinkles) that pack easily and you don't have to worry about it taking up space. Just go and enjoy yourself. I guarantee you even you won't remember what others wore the next day.

[startwin]

We do not attend MDR on formal nights very often any more.

 

But if we do, we usually wear about $51,000. worth of jewelry.

 

:D:D:D - I think I like you, LOL

[mudscraper]

We do not attend MDR on formal nights very often any more.

 

But if we do, we usually wear about $51,000. worth of jewelry.

If that`s all the baubles you can afford please dine in the Lido.:)

[DizzyDallasDi]

If that`s all the baubles you can afford please dine in the Lido.:)

 

I usually wear only $49,900 worth of bling so I guess I'll be ordering room service. ;) Truthfully, I only wear panties and a robe when ordering room service....no one has ever accepted my tip in that outfit. :rolleyes:

[Cqis]

Formal wear has been a part of cruising for such a long time. I often wonder if some people dislike it because they are uncomfortable with dressing up because they don't do it on a regular basis. The people that say" I don't want formal nights because I have to wear a suit and tie at work." should have no problem wearing one they are already comfortable in. On the other hand is this the only time they can openly rebel against something. Would they go to a company formal on a Saturday in jeans, because it is their day off and they had to wear a suit all week. I wonder if this is also the people that do not show up for life boat instruction?

[traveling mama]

I dress for myself. I enjoy dressing up and do so...and if no one else does I don't care. I do it for me.

 

I travel alone. Always wear pants and flats cause I'm old and that is the most comfy for me. I have very dressy tops, nice antique jewelry from my Grannie, and I get done up quite splendorous.....

 

I always compliment myself and love cruising!

 

I also book a balcony and spend hours in privacy reading and watching the water......an endless joy for me.

 

La dee dah!

[traveling mama]

Whoops.....should have typed "splendorous LY"......I think!

[Jalex63]

Generally, the slow progress of getting away from wearing really formal clorhing on formal nights is a result of the dressing down taking place thruout society as a whole. Remember when flying was considered an event and you put on your "sunday best" for the flight? It was truly a special event in ones life and you dressed the best for it. Now, flash forward to todays reality which has come about from air line deregulation of the '70s. Now flying is a hassle, I mean a major hassle and you are crammed cattle car style on to a place and forced often times next to a sweaty, stinky obese person who bought his ticket thru price-line for half what you paid for yours. Fun, ain't it? But....it is cheaper which means that the low class individual sitting next to you is able to afford it. Just a few years back, he could not and as a result took the Greyhound.

 

Well enter Mass Market Cruises. Great for the market, they are filling ship after ship with eager cruisers at a lower Discounted cruise fees which has opened the venue to millions who could not afford to cruise before. I have talked to a few of these lower class cruisers and they tell me they don't even own a suit much less a tux and have no interest in ever having one.

 

Personally, I wore a suit and tie to work for over 30 years and during that time I think I wore a rented TUX a couple of times when I was in a wedding. When I started cruising, I rented a tux for formal nights so that I could dress up and pretend to be of the wealthy class (which I am not) and went along with the fantasy. Well, honestly I don't care to "Pretend" anymore so I have limited it to a nice dark suit on formal nights and if I don;t want to dress I then limit my self to the lido for dinner (in slacks, not shorts). Ie, I go along and try not to offend anyone. But nor do I intend to pretend that I am of a social class that I am not, in fact the class that wore tux's to dinner for real is just about gone. TOdays world is becoming much more relaxed and I don't mind it a bit. Dirty, unshaven, shorts, jeans in the MDR.....NO! I am not that relaxed!

[COLLEYBERRY]

I usually wear only $49,900 worth of bling so I guess I'll be ordering room service. ;) Truthfully, I only wear panties and a robe when ordering room service....no one has ever accepted my tip in that outfit. :rolleyes:

 

 

For Heaven's sake Diane ,put some clothes on and buy some jewelry will ya. !:D

[Boytjie]

Generally, the slow progress of getting away from wearing really formal clorhing on formal nights is a result of the dressing down taking place thruout society as a whole. Remember when flying was considered an event and you put on your "sunday best" for the flight? It was truly a special event in ones life and you dressed the best for it. Now, flash forward to todays reality which has come about from air line deregulation of the '70s. Now flying is a hassle, I mean a major hassle and you are crammed cattle car style on to a place and forced often times next to a sweaty, stinky obese person who bought his ticket thru price-line for half what you paid for yours. Fun, ain't it? But....it is cheaper which means that the low class individual sitting next to you is able to afford it. Just a few years back, he could not and as a result took the Greyhound.

 

Well enter Mass Market Cruises. Great for the market, they are filling ship after ship with eager cruisers at a lower Discounted cruise fees which has opened the venue to millions who could not afford to cruise before. I have talked to a few of these lower class cruisers and they tell me they don't even own a suit much less a tux and have no interest in ever having one.

 

Personally, I wore a suit and tie to work for over 30 years and during that time I think I wore a rented TUX a couple of times when I was in a wedding. When I started cruising, I rented a tux for formal nights so that I could dress up and pretend to be of the wealthy class (which I am not) and went along with the fantasy. Well, honestly I don't care to "Pretend" anymore so I have limited it to a nice dark suit on formal nights and if I don;t want to dress I then limit my self to the lido for dinner (in slacks, not shorts). Ie, I go along and try not to offend anyone. But nor do I intend to pretend that I am of a social class that I am not, in fact the class that wore tux's to dinner for real is just about gone. TOdays world is becoming much more relaxed and I don't mind it a bit. Dirty, unshaven, shorts, jeans in the MDR.....NO! I am not that relaxed!

 

Since you apparently are high class, why the heck are you in the cheap seats with the low classes? :confused:

 

When I wear a tux, I am not pretending anything, I am just wearing a tux. :rolleyes: