GASP .... We're Ready to Give Up Formal

[Sea King]

 

 

On formal nights we may easily be wearing $50,000 worth of jewelry.

 

Scott & Karen

 

Ouch:eek:

[Sea King]

Great idea! People who want to dress up could dine in the formal dining room. Those who don't want to dress up could eat in the Lido.

 

But isn't that system already in place?

 

that's one of the problems .. the dress code isn't enforced:mad:

 

if you can walk into MDR on formal night with jeans and a shirt and be seated, what's it all about:confused:

[Love the beach]

Nonsense? I beg to differ! ;) The formalwear that I (used) to pack added 10 pounds to the weight of my checked luggage! :eek: Now I have more weight allowance for my Speedos to wear at the Lido pool! :D

Yay!!!

Those of you who enjoy dressing up, please don't give it up. We will continue to do so. :)

Marge

[NHRedSoxFan]

What makes me laugh sometimes is when I read a post here asking how can they get an Officer to dine at their table on formal night? Of course, I almost never personally know the people posting it but I picture an officer going to the trouble to put on their beautiful, starched whites, dressing up and looking great to be shown to a table of people who never did get in the shower and are wearing the dirty t shirt they wore all day in the hot Caribbean sun.

 

Would you want to work on the ship all day, get back to your cabin tired but go to the trouble to make a special evening for a lucky table of guests to find they didn't bother to wash let alone dress appropriately?

 

Why would they bother to come out at night if that is what they are greeted with?

Just speculating, of course........ ;)

 

 

YES> They certainly can.

 

 

 

Sail7 -I was thinking this, too. We recently returned from a Celebrity cruise. There were three formal nights. My DH and I, along with two of our friends were invited to dine at the captain's table on the third formal night. We sat at the Chief Engineer's table on a cruise about 12 years ago and not since then, so these opportunities are not frequent. At least not for us. It was a great experience, but I wondered "why us?" How did this come about? It was only our third Celebrity cruise, so we're not Elite. It was our friends first Celebrity cruise. While at dinner I glanced around at diners at other tables and I saw a few jackets & ties and a few formal and semi-formal dressed ladies, but a lot more casually dressed passengers, including jeans, polo shirts, cotton capris, etc. I wondered how they knew we'd dress appropriately?

[Randyk47]

Great idea! People who want to dress up could dine in the formal dining room. Those who don't want to dress up could eat in the Lido.

 

But isn't that system already in place?

 

I agree that's supposedly the system that's in place but HAL hasn't enforced it. I guess I could start complaining about it. After all it seems to me that in a generic sense the collective "we" has been more into complaining lately about just about anything and everything. :rolleyes: :) Maybe if enough people do then HAL will either drop the pretense totally and do away with formal nights or enforce the guidelines.

[Divi]

We are dioing the 35 day VOV in 2012. It will be our 4th HAL cruise.

My DH doesn't own a tux so he has rented one for each of our previous cruises.

For the first time we will be able to drive to the port for our next cruise. No luggage restrictions...yay.

As our cruise gets closer, I will be asking on our roll call what the men will be wearing, a tux or suit, and my DH will decide which he prefers.

As many have already stated, a cruise is almost the only chance we have to dress up these days.

On our last cruise, there was a large table near us that dressed in everything from golf shirts to very formal on "elegant" night. I didn't care, I just found it interesting. It's always fun to people watch.:p

I think I must be one of those dinosaurs mentioned in a earlier post.:rolleyes:

Deen

[bet410]

I have to admit that I really DON'T like dressing up for formal night. That said, I would never even consider showing up in the MDR dressed less than what is requested by HAL! If it says formal night, I'll either dress formal or (on very rare occasion) choose to eat in the Lido or (even more rarely) opt for room service.

 

I'm happy to say that on all my cruises, I've never had someone else at my table dress inappropriately. People who choose to ignore the dress "request" show a lack of consideration, not only for Holland America, but also for their fellow cruisers. But then we're now living in a "me first" generation where people seem to think the rules are for everyone but themselves.

 

Sad! :(

[Globaliser]

Airline luggage rules are the reason lots of folks give.

...

But $30 for a suitcase is not the reason. ... With careful planning, one can bring tuxedo and everything else they need in under 50 pound suitcase. They do not want to.

I agree. Luggage rules are simply an excuse. My companion and I have each historically taken formal clothes and gym stuff together with all the other clothes needed for a cruise, and each routinely keep it to one bag under the 50 lb mark. And even then we usually don't manage to wear everything that we've brought.

 

We simply can't understand the amount of stuff that some people lug around when they travel, and not just on cruises.

I'm not changing my lifestyle for the sake of others. Once you give up you lose.

That's true. But if HAL were to give up on elegant sophistication and become just another cruise line that caters to the same mass market as all the other "smart casual is good enough for us" cruise lines, my return to HAL may be short-lived.

[sail7seas]

Sail, what I don't understand about your post is why you are singling out formal nights. What you described as how some people dressed wouldn't pass muster on Smart Casual night, either. To appear for the evening not showered and changed, in shorts, t-shirts, sweatsuits, etc. is not smart casual. It's slovenly, at best, and may very well be worse.

 

Let's assume for the sake of argument that you are not a slob (a fair evaluation knowing you; you have personal pride), then you will change after a day ashore. You need something to change into. It might as well meet the dress code, be it a formal or smart casual night.

 

All this stuff about airline restrictions and extra costs for suitcases is nonsense. Dressy clothes don't have to weigh anymore than sloppy ones.

 

 

Ruth,

Actually, I didn't single out formal nights.

See my underlines.

 

 

 

 

DH and I just returned from two wonderful weeks on Maasdam and enjoyed ourselves greatly, as always.

 

DH wore tuxedo and I wore cocktail dresses for our four formal nights and we were happy and all was well.

 

However, it is clear, many do not think formal means them and we saw more shorts, t shirts, sneakers, sweaty clothes that had without doubt been worn all day and unwashed bodies with greasy hair than I care to see any evening let alone 'formal night'.

 

Done. We say 'uncle'.

We are ready to say........ no more formal.

I do not expect HAL to fight with guests as to what they should be wearing.

 

They are in the hospitality business and not interested in squabbling with their guests.

When HAL started describing formal as far less than anyone else would describe it, they gave up on formal.

 

What they describe is not formal so please......

 

Give it up. It's over. On smart casual nights, far more people seemed to make an effort to 'clean up' for the evening than did on formal night. There are far too many ignoring polite request to observe dress code to disregard anymore.

IMO

[Boytjie]

Perhaps the cruise line should have a dinning room for the people who want to dress up and one for people who don't .

 

They already do! One is called the Main Dining Room and the other is called the Lido restaurant. ;)

[Boytjie]

In this day and age, formality is going in the dust bin whether you like it or not.

 

Calling others you disagree with "dinosaurs" sure proves that point. :rolleyes:

[HeatherInFlorida]

I just never tire of dress code threads; they always serve up another dose of "Why am I so much classier than everyone else".

 

At the same time, I happen to be on the side of keeping formal nights alive, but in no way will what others choose to do affect what I choose to do. As long as HAL or any other cruise line has "formal night", I will continue to dress accordingly.

 

That said, "smart casual" or what Wind Star called "casual elegance", can be pretty stunning. And just because someone is casually dressed with a messy look doesn't mean they didn't shower. It's a "look" and strangely one that many in our younger generation find attractive. You can buy torn jeans with holes in them and some cost hundreds of $$$.

 

I hope that the couple who bring along +$50K worth of jewelery are heavily insured. That is scary to even pack it, let alone wear it ... not in my wildest dreams.

 

The observation of this thread comes as a surprise to me. Whether on HAL or Celebrity in recent years I have not once seen people way under dressing on formal nights. While tux and evening gowns have become less popular over time, with rare exception men are in jackets and ties at the very least and women are dressed in cocktail attire. Out and about I might see some pretty grundgy stuff after 6:00, but not in the dining room.

 

I think HAL muddies the waters on purpose in all their advertising so they will appear to be all things to all people and let the chips fall where they may. No need for those of us who still want to dress for formal night to follow those who don't like lemmings into the sea:rolleyes:.

[Boytjie]

I wondered how they knew we'd dress appropriately?

 

The cabin stewards report which passengers have formal wear in their closets. :D

[Keith Rita]

We belong to one of the oldest ballroom dance clubs in the US. They just recently relaxed the strict dance code to get new younger members to join. We voted for the change to help save the club. It wasn't much of a change, tea length dresses are now allowed instead of just long gowns. The men are now allowed to wear a dark suit instead of just a tux, however they are still not allowed to remove their jackets while on the dance floor. As far as sea cruises go we've always enjoyed the formal nights and will continue to do so. We have become a more casual society however we are hard-liners and will still dress for the Senior's Prom! We cruise for our enjoyment and don't get bent out of shape when other violate the dress code.

[Yaya&Papu]

We just got back from the Westerdam. To be honest, I did not notice what most people were wearing, but there seemed to be more young ladies in "Sunday dresses" rather than truly formal clothes.

DH used to bring a tux (many years ago) but now he brings a dark suit. I have a long black skirt with several glittery tops - these do not weigh much nor take up much room. I used to bring a beaded, sequined cocktail dress, but it is very heavy, so no longer.

We took a Med cruise on Oceania's Insignia (country club casual for every night) a couple of years ago and the people on that cruise were dressed more nicely than any HAL cruise we've ever been on.

[PCruzer]

Great idea! People who want to dress up could dine in the formal dining room. Those who don't want to dress up could eat in the Lido.

 

But isn't that system already in place?

You are absolutely right, Ruth! The Lido dining was added for those who wanted a super casual venue for dinner.

[3rdGenCunarder]

Sail, what I don't understand about your post is why you are singling out formal nights. What you described as how some people dressed wouldn't pass muster on Smart Casual night, either. To appear for the evening not showered and changed, in shorts, t-shirts, sweatsuits, etc. is not smart casual. It's slovenly, at best, and may very well be worse.

 

Let's assume for the sake of argument that you are not a slob (a fair evaluation knowing you; you have personal pride), then you will change after a day ashore. You need something to change into. It might as well meet the dress code, be it a formal or smart casual night.

 

All this stuff about airline restrictions and extra costs for suitcases is nonsense. Dressy clothes don't have to weigh anymore than sloppy ones.

 

I agree completely! If I have been in port all day, or lying in a lounger by the pool, I know that I am in no fit state for the dining room. I have to put on something after I shower, why not the good stuff?

 

And I agree on the weight issue. Fancy ripped-on-purpose $300 jeans easily weigh as much as a nice dress. leave the jeans, take the dress!

[Palmetto Lady]

My husband's only dark suit IS his tuxedo!

I never did take beaded clothing because of its weight - and that was before they charged for overweight.

[michmike]

no amount of hand wringing or pining for the "old days" is going to change this pattern. So all you can do is to dress appropriately yourself and simply ignore what others are doing. It simply is what it is.

 

I'm not really sure if that is good , bad or indifferent. All I know is that I'd rather be on a cruise than most anywhere else when it comes to vacation and if I have to deal w/ a few things that are not as i'd like them to be, then I just grin and bear it and get on w/ my life.

[LoyHAL]

Hang in there, Sail! You aren't alone.

 

We just do what we like -- which is 'dress up'. I admit the sequins stay home now -- and the tux, but DH takes a black suit [which he can interchange with a sport coat and slax for smart casual nights] and I still love to be 'sparkly'.

 

I have also been appalled at the dirty jeans and sweat shirts. What are they thinking? Or are they thinking. Trying to make a statement?

 

Don't really care what others wear, but cleanliness should be a priority -- especially on a formal night. No extra charge for the showers -- as yet! :D

 

We are dressing for the crew, the officers, and the experience. It's a sign of respect for us. Guess it just shows our age?

LoyHAL

[Hobbsey]

Sail, what I don't understand about your post is why you are singling out formal nights. What you described as how some people dressed wouldn't pass muster on Smart Casual night, either. To appear for the evening not showered and changed, in shorts, t-shirts, sweatsuits, etc. is not smart casual. It's slovenly, at best, and may very well be worse.

Let's assume for the sake of argument that you are not a slob (a fair evaluation knowing you; you have personal pride), then you will change after a day ashore. You need something to change into. It might as well meet the dress code, be it a formal or smart casual night.

All this stuff about airline restrictions and extra costs for suitcases is nonsense. Dressy clothes don't have to weigh anymore than sloppy ones.

 

It might seem counter intuitive for me to say HERE HERE (since I believe that formal should be optional), but Ruth, your post is right on and among the best I have read in this thread so far. No piece of clothing is heavier than a pair of jeans. Also, no one should have the right to crash an elegant environment in shorts and Ts (clean or sweaty dirty). A jacket and tie do not take up an entire suite case. A family of four (or 5) should be able to pack all of their necessaries for an elegant night in one bag.

 

Comon folks, we talking about exercising some common sense and following the general guidlines so that everyone gets to have a good experience on the vacation they have paid for. If you want to dress down on the dress up night, then use the venue that will welcome your style that night.

 

Jeff

[luxurysailer]

On my first cruise sixteen years ago I was really aggravated to have to take along a tux. However, it readily became apparent how special it was to participate in a formal evening on an elegant cruise ship. Since then I have become a big supporter of formal nights and my wife and I look forward to them.

 

Unfortunately the majority opinion in today's society appears to be that rules apply to everyone but themselves, and heaven forbid the thought that they would accede to a polite request. Polite society appears to be bound for hell in a hand basket. Nevertheless, I intend not to contribute to the coarsening of society.

[Fishfindergirl]

I think as we grow older, its not so much the money for the extra bag, its the hassle of too many bags. Add that to the hassle with all the airport security and its just not worth it. We used to always carry formal and what used to be coat & tie for men on the nights that weren't casual or formal. There used to be only one casual night on a 7-day cruise and that was the day of embarkation. Ed still carries his sports coat and a few ties but I don't do the sequins and long dresses anymore. I do miss the dressier times but it seems they are passe everywhere. I think the dress today is sometimes horrendous but that is probably my age. I dont' like unironed clothes and shirt tails hanging out. Its tacky and that is just a fact not an opinion. A person can looked well groomed and still be casual.

 

Yes it is not the money It is the bags. I know things happen and Have been stuck with the bags so we pack a lot lighter than we use to.

[3rdGenCunarder]

From what I've read on the HAL boards, it seems that a lot of the people who don't want to "dress up" for formal night want to stick with the same dress as on other nights in the MDR. It isn't what I'd like to see, but it certainly isn't horrible.

 

I think what sticks in the mind of those of us who like formal nights are the people Sail was describing. People who show up in cutoffs, flip flops, printed t-shirts, and as she descibed some--unwashed. Think of what you might wear to weed the garden. This is NOT casual. it is (here comes the s word) sloppy! And unfortunately, some of them stand there with a lot of attitude, as if they're spoiling for a fight. These people are a small minority, but they're a memorable minority.

 

Here's something to think about. Some of the people who post loudest against formal night are probably AFRAID of it because they don't know what to wear. This is especially true of new cruisers, and I am not pointing to anyone on this thread. If it's a man, maybe he had to wear a horrible tux for a wedding or had a lousy time at his prom. If it's a woman, maybe she's unsure of what kind of dress/gown she needs.

 

But here is an example. On another board, a discussion of formal vs semiformal vs casual was full of the usual posters for that line. Someone with very few posts appeared and announced that on his upcoming cruise (on a very formal line) NOBODY was going to make him dress up. He belongs to a countryclub and thumbs his nose at their dress code all the time and by golly, he's gonna thumb his nose at the cruise ship's dress code and all the stupid dressed up people there, too! (Don't bother to search for it, the post is gone).

 

It was one nasty post, and I suspect it got a lot of triangles! I checked the ID's other posts to find out if he was really such a nasty person. And there, on a roll call, were a couple of posts from the wife saying that they were so afraid they wouldn't dress correctly, etc. She was willing to admit she didn't know what to wear and to ask for help. He just showed up, did his belligerent act, and wasn't seen on that board again.

 

Again, not pointing fingers here, but I have noticed that some people hide insecurity with hostility.

[elycelynne]

I have no problem adhering to formal night dress code; however, I have another question:

 

My jewelry is strictly costume.:o Will I be banished to the Lido?:rolleyes:;)