Same sex or no sex?

[Cruiser Craig]

Sadly you're probably right jamessemaj, and I bet it has a lot to do with CowPrincess' insight on how a lot of today's older gay people were conditioned back in the pre-Oprah, pre-internet, pre-Iphone days when being different (especially with respect to sexual orientation) was taught as being equal to being bad or wrong or, just pick and choose a negative adjective and insert it here.

 

And that puts the onus on those of us whose feet fit into those shoes to just try to get over it, ignore the flashbacks if and when judgemental attutudes arise, and make an extra effort to go out and meet all of the positive people like those who've taken the time to post responses here.

 

Thanks for the therapy session, CowPrincess. I owe you one! Here's to wishing you green pastures! You've certainly given me some self-reflection cud to chew...

[IslandExplorer]

A lot of the threads on this site are rather long, even when the topic posted seems rather interesting. Who has time to scroll through six pages of posts?

[Cruiser Craig]

...On a straight cruise, it's much better to sit on your own at a table for two, or with other gay cruisers. It's too stressful dealing with straight people at meals.

 

Wow, this is pretty much the opposite of what I just concluded and wrote, after having thought long and hard about CowPrincess' post, but as I said earlier, there's no right or wrong, just gut-responses.

[CowPrincess]

Sadly you're probably right jamessemaj, and I bet it has a lot to do with CowPrincess' insight on how a lot of today's older gay people were conditioned back in the pre-Oprah, pre-internet, pre-Iphone days when being different (especially with respect to sexual orientation) was taught as being equal to being bad or wrong or, just pick and choose a negative adjective and insert it here.

 

And that puts the onus on those of us whose feet fit into those shoes to just try to get over it, ignore the flashbacks if and when judgemental attutudes arise, and make an extra effort to go out and meet all of the positive people like those who've taken the time to post responses here.

 

Thanks for the therapy session, CowPrincess. I owe you one! Here's to wishing you green pastures! You've certainly given me some self-reflection cud to chew...

 

Thanks Cruiser Craig :)

 

Cyber hugs to you {{{{{{Cruiser Craig}}}}}

[CruiseWhere]

I say live and let live. It makes life that much easier and enjoyable...especially for yourself:)

[Alamogirl]

People are people we are all the same. Go and enjoy and PARTICIPATE!! I have been talking to a couple that are ladies to go on a cruise and even join my husband and I. Fingers crossed they will one day.

[wwcruisers]

Although my partner and I have been together for over 33 years, we still seem to get some unpredictable attitude from certain co-cruise guests. It's to the point that, although we're about to embark on our third cruise this year, after our eye-brow-raising reception on our latest cruise last May, I haven't even bothered to sign us up for the roll call on the cruise we'll be taking in November.

 

So please, here on an anonymous forum, this is the time to speak up. Would you prefer that two women together or two men together on a cruise just keep to themselves and not participate in cruise life? There's obviously no right answer nor no wrong answer, I'd just like to hear your gut-response! Don't feel as if you'll be pre-judged by me because you won't be.

 

So what is it, same sex or no sex?

 

It makes me sad to hear you say that you aren't signing up for your upcoming roll-call. :( Did you have problems with r/c'ers on your last cruise? Over the years, I've found roll-calls to be great places to meet your fellow cruisers. The ones that I've been part of have been very accepting and non-judgmental. I hope that you and your partner will have a change of heart, and give your new roll-call group a try. :)

[JSWalk]

Cruiser Craig,

 

As the Mother of a gay son in a small town in Oregon, I know the hurt that can be inflicted. But I also know that times are changing, Thank Goodness. I just hope that someday my son will find a life partner like you did and that he can be happy. Go and enjoy your cruise and I hope you meet many accepting fellow cruisers.

[cb at sea]

I'm not sure how anyone would even know you're a couple, unless you are being to "friendly" in public.

[spookwife]

Although my partner and I have been together for over 33 years, we still seem to get some unpredictable attitude from certain co-cruise guests. It's to the point that, although we're about to embark on our third cruise this year, after our eye-brow-raising reception on our latest cruise last May, I haven't even bothered to sign us up for the roll call on the cruise we'll be taking in November.

 

So please, here on an anonymous forum, this is the time to speak up. Would you prefer that two women together or two men together on a cruise just keep to themselves and not participate in cruise life? There's obviously no right answer nor no wrong answer, I'd just like to hear your gut-response! Don't feel as if you'll be pre-judged by me because you won't be.

 

So what is it, same sex or no sex?

 

 

umm as long as you are not groping each other in public I could give a fig. and that goes for heterosexual couples as well. in fact I find them to be more obnoxious when it comes to PDAs

[calliopecruiser]

I'm not sure how anyone would even know you're a couple, unless you are being to "friendly" in public.

 

Seriously? You can't tell a long-married couple just from their body language and behaviour towards one another? And what about not "too friendly" affectionate things like hand-holding, a kiss on the cheek, or shoulder rub applying sunscreen? There are a million ways we can spot couples in a crowd if you see them for more than 5 minutes, let alone seeing them frequently on a ship.

 

Personally, I don't care one way or another. It's not like I don't see homosexual couples elsewhere in my life, and I pay them as much attention (or lack thereof) as any other couple I encounter.

[khm1]

Although my partner and I have been together for over 33 years, we still seem to get some unpredictable attitude from certain co-cruise guests. It's to the point that, although we're about to embark on our third cruise this year, after our eye-brow-raising reception on our latest cruise last May, I haven't even bothered to sign us up for the roll call on the cruise we'll be taking in November.

 

So please, here on an anonymous forum, this is the time to speak up. Would you prefer that two women together or two men together on a cruise just keep to themselves and not participate in cruise life? There's obviously no right answer nor no wrong answer, I'd just like to hear your gut-response! Don't feel as if you'll be pre-judged by me because you won't be.

 

So what is it, same sex or no sex?

 

Do not let bigotry stop you from enjoying the company of your roll call members. It infuriates me that others behave in a way that would make you uncomfortable.

 

That being said, if you do participate in the roll call, the other members will probably understand your family situation. You will probably be able to "read between the lines" and get a idea of how you will be received. If you feel uncomfortable, you have an opportunity to decide if you want to meet the roll call members on board or not.

 

There will always be narrow-minded and judgmental people on every ship. I, for one, would love to socialize with you and your partner!

[TC1957]

The OP, like every other human, will find some that disapprove of how they live...but their's is a particularly hot issue these days for a multitude of reasons. I know I am butchering the line but nobody can make you feel inferior without your permission.

 

As long as there isn't public groping, your not "making out" in the hot tub or pool and not trying to get us involved in "adult" activities with you I could not care less. Now, if you are doing those things I may try to throw you overboard...but that would be true of a straight couple as well :D

[d1cso4]

Hello Craig,

I would not have a problem and I feel sorry for people that do. I have been on plenty of post thanksgiving cruises one just recently on the Celebrity Eclipse. Bottom line people just want to have fun. Its not going to ruin nothing.

 

Sent from my SAMSUNG-SGH-I317 using Forums mobile app

[Stateroom_Sailor]

For the record, I know PLENTY of secure women who "butch their hair" as you so indelicately put it. They happen to LIKE short hair, and I find your implication there offensive.

 

Then be offended. Everyone has masculine and feminine qualities, to one degree or another. Those who artificially and overtly cling to stigmas of either their own sex, or the opposite, are insecure. That because it has become their identity, which is off by default, and likely masking something else. The "short hair" is only a descriptor, a metaphor, so if you take that literal you've missed the point.

[cruise10000]

I dont judge others.:)

[tip]

It is the 21st Century. A couple's sexual preference is none of my concern. I am not sure why others are concerned and would make rude comments, (etc., etc., etc.).

[Cruiser Craig]

I say live and let live. It makes life that much easier and enjoyable...especially for yourself:)

 

Well said, Catherine.

[dread_pirate]

As long as there isn't public groping, your not "making out" in the hot tub or pool and not trying to get us involved in "adult" activities with you I could not care less. Now, if you are doing those things I may try to throw you overboard...but that would be true of a straight couple as well :D

Bingo! Same sex, different sex, no difference - just no sex in public!

 

Reminds me of an interview in which Irish Catholic Anne Meara was asked how it felt to be in a mixed marriage to Jewish Jerry Stiller. Her response: "Mixed marriage? Oh, because he's a man & I'm a woman?"

[Watson's aunt]

also wondering if my husband and my 6 sister wives would be accepted??

 

( not really polygamist- just curious?)

 

 

As a solo traveler out to steal husbands (just kiddiing) Boy would some of these women tongues wagging.

 

 

 

Mary

[bplazo]

Not something I would even give a thought about. Enjoy your cruise.

[notentirelynormal]

Bingo! Same sex, different sex, no difference - just no sex in public!

 

Reminds me of an interview in which Irish Catholic Anne Meara was asked how it felt to be in a mixed marriage to Jewish Jerry Stiller. Her response: "Mixed marriage? Oh, because he's a man & I'm a woman?"

 

Exactly. I don't want to see anyone having sex or being overly friendly (you know tongue down the throat kind of thing) in public. I don't want to know what you are doing in the bedroom either but as long as you're an adult and it's consenting, I don't care.

 

Years ago my daughter dated this jerk who wanted to show me that he had control of her. So standing in my living room he kisses with his tongue so far in her mouth I was surprised she didn't gag. After he left I told her the next time she did that I was going to take her upstairs and she was going to watch dad and I have sex. GROSS!, she says. No more gross then me watching you. She's been married 10 years and kisses to her husband in public are the peck on the lips kind.

 

My SIL's nephew "came out" at their anniversary party last month. He was really nervous telling everyone even though it wasn't much of a surprise to any of us. My daughter says to him, "Umm my brother over there is gay, our best man is gay and that's his partner and my cousin is gay". Ohhhh he says. LOL.

[Cruiser Craig]

I have to admit, I don't understand this 'groping dilemma'. We simply do not grope, period. We might touch, or caress (we do), but only in complete privacy. 'Groping' for me is one of those bizarre verbs which describes action in stipper clubs with pole dancing or maybe what could occur on third world subways during rush hours.

 

Don't tell me that after seeing two men lounging around next to the pool for two weeks, laughing and maybe sharing the same book, getting each other a beverage from time to time, sharing headsets for that special tune...you get it, right? These aren't two males on the prowl for female pole dancing moves?

 

'Groping' might be the greatest fear you have we could do with each other in public.

 

Except that we don't.

 

Ever.

 

We don't grope.

 

We don't even hold hands.

 

We simply enjoy each other's company.

 

OK, maybe, just maybe, we'll share a spoon of soufflé or another dessert when no one appears to be looking.

 

Is that so bad?

[Cruiser Craig]

Exactly. I don't want to see anyone having sex or being overly friendly (you know tongue down the throat kind of thing) in public. I don't want to know what you are doing in the bedroom either but as long as you're an adult and it's consenting, I don't care.

 

Years ago my daughter dated this jerk who wanted to show me that he had control of her. So standing in my living room he kisses with his tongue so far in her mouth I was surprised she didn't gag. After he left I told her the next time she did that I was going to take her upstairs and she was going to watch dad and I have sex. GROSS!, she says. No more gross then me watching you. She's been married 10 years and kisses to her husband in public are the peck on the lips kind.

 

My SIL's nephew "came out" at their anniversary party last month. He was really nervous telling everyone even though it wasn't much of a surprise to any of us. My daughter says to him, "Umm my brother over there is gay, our best man is gay and that's his partner and my cousin is gay". Ohhhh he says. LOL.

 

 

Truly blessed, bravo!

 

When I came out over a decade ago to my ultra-religious mother and so-so dad after twenty years with my partner, explaining that notwithstanding denial, my same 'room-mate' over the preceding years, was not just my 'room-mate', but is that he's my soul-mate and the person I love and will spend the rest of my life with in an exclusive, loving relationship, the answer I got was this:

 

"Because of having chosen to live this abomination, you will both burn in hell for eternity."

 

Neither parents have ever met my partner.

 

Paging Doctor CowPrincess, Paging Dr CowPrincess, painful memory alert, I think I need a follow-up therapy session!

[Stateroom_Sailor]

OK, maybe, just maybe, we'll share a spoon of soufflé or another dessert when no one appears to be looking.

 

Is that so bad?

 

That's a question that no one here can answer, partially because many posters already have, and you are still not at ease. After 33 years, and multiple cruises, cc replies are only going to be a quick fix. This has more to do with you, or your relationship, and coming to terms.

 

Maybe I'm sounding harsh, but I'm trying to just give you my honest opinion. We're in talks about joining my wife's uncle in Alaska, including his BF. He doesn't need repeat reassurance. To him, he'll be a normal guy on the ship, who happens to be gay, instead of a gay guy on the ship who wants to be accepted as normal.