Cruise Itch (and still over 100 days to go) ---Tell me your funny cruise story!!!

[kimma11]

What have you seen or heard while cruising that still makes you smile? We have gone on 1 cruise so far, and the funniest memories are watching people run back to the boat at the end of a port day. My daughter would stand on our balcony yelling, "You can make it!!! Just jump." It became an awesome highlight of our trip. Other than that we didn't see any naked people or run into complete idiots on our cruise. So tell me your stories and help me pass the next 111 days!!!! ;p

[cocoaloco]

First night of cruise, a lady calls guest services:

 

"Would you have the Captain stop the ship for a couple of minutes? My husband needs to use the bathroom."

 

after confusion on the part of the guest services employee, the lady continues:

 

"Our first time cruising and he has discovered he can't "go" on a moving ship...."

 

Carnival Splendor, Jan. 14, 2018,,, a 13 day Journeys cruise ...

[nycruise3]

Our cruise director told us this:

 

An older man just got a cup of coffee and took a sip. It was too hot, so he started coughing. He leaned over the balcony and kept coughing. He coughed so hard that his dentures flew out of his mouth into the water! He spent the rest of the cruise eating soft foods.

[Lydia B.]

Oh my very first cruise we decided to let them take our luggage off on the last day instead of self debarkation. I very carefully laid out all my clothes in my room that I would need and put my luggage outside in the hallway.

The next morning I realized I had not left myself a brassiere! I had a T-shirt and jeans on with the blue denim shirt. I remember I just kind a hunch my shoulders forward to try to cover up as best I could but I was very embarrassed!:confused:I remember I just kind a hunch my shoulders forward to try to cover up as best I could but I was very embarrassed!

[Shaded Lady]

First night of cruise, a lady calls guest services:

 

"Would you have the Captain stop the ship for a couple of minutes? My husband needs to use the bathroom."

 

after confusion on the part of the guest services employee, the lady continues:

 

"Our first time cruising and he has discovered he can't "go" on a moving ship...."

 

Carnival Splendor, Jan. 14, 2018,,, a 13 day Journeys cruise ...

Oh my! I can only imagine how their port days were spent!

[Cruisin 4 Ever]

My husband was very disoriented on one of our cruises. One night he got up in the middle of the night and just in the nick of time I saw he was about to pee in the closet. Another night I woke up to knocking on the door. That night he walked into the hall thinking it was the washroom and got locked out of our cabin. He was in just his underwear!!!

[griffy116]

We saw an entire family exiting the ship in their pj's. I'm just guessing but they must have forgotten to leave an outfit out before putting their luggage out in the hall the night before.

[Keith1010]

We saw an entire family exiting the ship in their pj's. I'm just guessing but they must have forgotten to leave an outfit out before putting their luggage out in the hall the night before.

 

This happened on our first cruise as well.

 

A family down the hall from us had the same issue.

 

Thankfully they got the luggage back.

 

Keith

[kimma11]

Omg. These are awedome. Please keep them coming.

 

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[Computer Nerd]

Watching a drunk face plant onto the deck (was not hurt).

[CruiseGal999]

My very first cruise ... I was 19 and going out of Boston to Bermuda. Upon boarding, we were handed a big tall rum something drink. I had a couple or few more. Then me & 2 friends were at the muster station and demo'd putting on the life jacket. In the photo, there was me in the middle, feeling very good, and sporting a completely inside out life jacket. Still makes me laugh.

[nybumpkin]

Oh my very first cruise we decided to let them take our luggage off on the last day instead of self debarkation. I very carefully laid out all my clothes in my room that I would need and put my luggage outside in the hallway.

The next morning I realized I had not left myself a brassiere! I had a T-shirt and jeans on with the blue denim shirt. I remember I just kind a hunch my shoulders forward to try to cover up as best I could but I was very embarrassed!:confused:I remember I just kind a hunch my shoulders forward to try to cover up as best I could but I was very embarrassed!

My aunt always told the story of disembarking a Princess cruise where she very carefully laid out clothes the night before. Unfortunately, with some last-minute changes, she managed to pack the slacks she planned to wear leaving the ship. The next morning - no slacks. Fortunately, she was able to call a friend she had met on the cruise who wore the same size - yes, she had an extra pair of slacks. :)

[JimAOk1945]

I just discovered this thread and I'm really enjoying it. I have a long way to go until my next cruise so I hope to read more hilarious stories.

[Dancing Shoes]

1983 Carnival to Caribbean. My future hubby and I in our 20's. Hubby picked up a joint in Jamaica. Put it in top dresser drawer. Came back and it was missing. Called our steward named Pok. Special cigarette missing, Pok. Ok, I will find it. Came back after dinner and it was in the drawer!!

[rnff2]

My husband and I were unpacking, we were still in port and had our balcony door open to listen to the sounds going on. We had been in and out several times and had seen and older couple out enjoying their balcony just above us. A few minutes later we had a knock on the door and this gentleman was at our cabin door saying he dropped something on our balcony and asking if he could retrieve it. He seemed a little anxious so I said sure and allowed him to come in and followed him to the balcony. He quickly grabbed the object thanked me and left. As he left I stood there shocked as my husband asked me what he had dropped. All I could say was there were teeth were on our balcony!!! My DH couldn't stop laughing as I cannot stand anything involving teeth and I kept repeating there were teeth on our balcony! We never saw the couple on their balcony the rest of the cruise, I have a feeling his wife wouldn't allow him back out there, unless they were her teeth!!!

 

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[SmoothFlying]

I've posted this before BUT it shows (or doesn't, I guess) how some people don't think. My wife and I were on an inland Alaskan cruise, out of Seattle 6/15/2010 and on the sea day in Tracey's Arm my wife was in the casino, sitting between two elderly ladies, who my wife guessed had to be in their late seventies, both from Miami Beach. My wife said she that after introductions were made she tried not too listen, but it was almost impossible as she was between the two older ladies and they were loudly griping too each other, across my wife, one said, ' You'd think that old idiot Captain, would sail to SOME part of Alaska where it's warmer!!' Her friend, sitting on the other side, loudly replied, ' I know ! HOW in the world do they expect us to sit out by the pool in fifty degree temperature AND a twenty mile an hour wind blowing across the deck!!:eek: My wife never smiled, said she was meeting me for lunch and would be back later, and left. When she got our cabin, between gales of laughter, she recounted said conversation, and ended it with, 'WHERE did they think they were sailing too? Freeport ??' I laughed, some people don't realize that even in June, Alaska be chilly.

 

Mac

[zigdilcru]

took a cruise of med and adriatic this past september, we had a veranda and the sliding door was really hard to open and close( very heavy). well my husband was outside on said veranda and i came out to join him but the door was really hard to close. he got up to close it for me and must have turned the lock and lo and behold he locked us out on the balcony. dont’t laugh we were looking at each other and wondering what the heck do we do? i heard the people on the next balcony and stuck my head around the divider and asked if they would take my card , come in and unlock the door. damn so embarrasing, but we laugh about it now. almost had to spend the night out there, you have been warned!!

[ScottyZkaaayk]

Thanks for these funny stories! Keeping me really entertained till my next cruise in 256 days.