Just off Liberty - unruly children a real problem!

[H82seaUgo]

Gravity or entropy? I think the op was stating that the kids were running AMOK and that they were reckless and not paying attention and ignoring crew. Quite similarly, how you only pay attention to only certain parts of posts.

 

gravity. i refuse to wear a morsette.

[H82seaUgo]

First off to the OP. Praying for the comfort that following your loved ones wishes will give you.

As for the parenting issues I see on this board. WOW. First I want to say I love children--it shows by the things I have chosen to do in my life. I am a GAL/ CASA, coach young children in gymnastics and cheer as well as own the gym and have been a Sunday school teacher for many years.

Will I speak to your child if they are misbehaving and are at risk of hurting themselves or others--Yes I will. Better now than when I have to see them in court for the bad choices their parents have instilled in them. Yes I am trained in the ways to speak with a disruptive child, but a lot of that is just common sense and learning what is right and wrong from my parents many years ago.

Telling a child to say inappropriate things to adults or allowing blatant bad manners to happen shows the parenting that I see most often in court. Yes I think that children can be kids just not to the detriment of others. The same good parenting skills that you would use on land should be used on sea. As for those adults that want to use physical force to stop these children--please think first.

I would be very thankful to an adult that stopped my child from hurting themself or making a nuisiance out of themselves in the proper way.

I have sailed on several different cruise lines and do not find Carnival the exception. They all have unruly chidlren and adults at sometime. Believe me parenting knows no socio-economic bounds. I see children of doctors, lawyers, CEO's as well as those on welfare and just getting by in court. Good parenting does not take a degree--just some common sense and a good moral background.

 

shall i assume you are paid to do this at a certain location, where the parents have put their faith and trust in you?

 

we did that in the kids catholic grammar school. it was sad and disturbing watching my daughter having to testify against her gym coach for inapropriate touching, and subsequently fired from that school.

[sharonax3]

shall i assume you are paid to do this at a certain location, where the parents have put their faith and trust in you?

 

we did that in the kids catholic grammar school. it was sad and disturbing watching my daughter having to testify against her gym coach for inapropriate touching, and subsequently fired from that school.

 

I have read all 21 pages of this. An interesting read to say the least! Your answers and comments to some of these posts make no sense, just like this last one. It must be very difficult to go thru life and not trust anyone and only see the "bad" in people. Of course there are going to be "some" bad apples in every group, but I think that most people are good and want to protect not only their children, but any child they see headed toward trouble. I personally would want someone to step in and say something to my child, if they were doing something inappropriate or were getting themselves into a dangerous situation. And I in turn would do the same.

[H82seaUgo]

I have read all 21 pages of this. An interesting read to say the least! Your answers and comments to some of these posts make no sense, just like this last one. It must be very difficult to go thru life and not trust anyone and only see the "bad" in people. Of course there are going to be "some" bad apples in every group, but I think that most people are good and want to protect not only their children, but any child they see headed toward trouble. I personally would want someone to step in and say something to my child, if they were doing something inappropriate or were getting themselves into a dangerous situation. And I in turn would do the same.

 

apparently, you have misunderstood some of what i have written. at no point have i indicated how my life's journey has affected how i rreact to the world.

 

we don't lve in bubbles, but nor have we decided that all kids are bad, every parent will welcome your interference, nor are all people bad. in fact, i said quite the opposite on my journey through this thread.

 

and certainly, this thread was not started nor about any dangerous situation.

 

you might have a go at another read through to clarify.

[San_Antonio_Ex]

As the original poster, I'm kind of sorry I did. My purpose was to inform people that Carnival does allow the scattering of ashes off of the ship. My second purpose was not to start a "kids/parents are horrible" thread, but to remind people that there are all kinds of people on ship, some of whom are elderly and grieving.

 

I'm so sorry that a few people have jumped on here to continue their spreading of hate and ugliness as they do on pretty much every other thread. I'm so glad someone posted how to put those posters on "ignore".

 

I want to thank everyone who posted their condolences. It means alot to me that total strangers would reach out that way.

 

I want to apologize for anything I have done to encourage those whose sole purpose is to "stir the pot". And for my reactions to their pot stirring.

 

I hope that everyone will let this thread go now. It simply isn't worth it to continue to give those pot stirrers a place to spew their hate.

[gusandgidgetsmom]

As your quote makes very little sense I wonder why you felt it necessary to comment. You did what in your children's school?? Gymnastics, cheer being a GAL ( which you could not be on your own child's case) any way the post was about parenting. Please stop trying to take every post and trying to make it something it isn't. If you think it makes you more informed--welll...........

shall i assume you are paid to do this at a certain location, where the parents have put their faith and trust in you?

 

we did that in the kids catholic grammar school. it was sad and disturbing watching my daughter having to testify against her gym coach for inapropriate touching, and subsequently fired from that school.

[gusandgidgetsmom]

Your post was fine--it was just that some wanted to put a crazy spin on it. You are entitled to your opinion and stated it well. Others of us posted ours in an informed and purposeful way and there was those that spew hate and negativity. Several of the posters are known for stirring the pot on any post and they did just that. Not your fault and quite frankly--I am just embarassed for them.

As the original poster, I'm kind of sorry I did. My purpose was to inform people that Carnival does allow the scattering of ashes off of the ship. My second purpose was not to start a "kids/parents are horrible" thread, but to remind people that there are all kinds of people on ship, some of whom are elderly and grieving.

 

I'm so sorry that a few people have jumped on here to continue their spreading of hate and ugliness as they do on pretty much every other thread. I'm so glad someone posted how to put those posters on "ignore".

 

I want to thank everyone who posted their condolences. It means alot to me that total strangers would reach out that way.

 

I want to apologize for anything I have done to encourage those whose sole purpose is to "stir the pot". And for my reactions to their pot stirring.

 

I hope that everyone will let this thread go now. It simply isn't worth it to continue to give those pot stirrers a place to spew their hate.

[SarahQ]

As the original poster, I'm kind of sorry I did. My purpose was to inform people that Carnival does allow the scattering of ashes off of the ship. My second purpose was not to start a "kids/parents are horrible" thread, but to remind people that there are all kinds of people on ship, some of whom are elderly and grieving.

 

I don't mean this to sound snarky at all, but...

 

Titling a thread "Just off Liberty - unruly children a real problem!" is going to have people clicking on it to read a thread about unruly children, and comment etc.

 

If it was titled "Carnival allows the scattering of ashes at sea", and the thread just happened to mention some unruly children, there would have been far fewer posts.

 

If your purpose is not to start threads that you know from experience on CC will be contentious, then it's best not to give it a title that is guaranteed to attract the pot-stirrers.

 

Certainly that isn't an excuse for what has transpired on this thread, but something to think about for future posts if you find these sorts of replies unsavoury.

[Gailerina]

No matter the title....I don't think the the issue with kids would have been ignored.

 

 

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk ~ sign the awesome Gailerina!

[H82seaUgo]

As your quote makes very little sense I wonder why you felt it necessary to comment. You did what in your children's school?? Gymnastics, cheer being a GAL ( which you could not be on your own child's case) any way the post was about parenting. Please stop trying to take every post and trying to make it something it isn't. If you think it makes you more informed--welll...........

 

not sure why you would not have simly referred to my previous sentence. to spell it out, we put our faith and trust in the staff at that school.

 

and i was talking to that specific poster, who worked with kids.

[HarpHarp]

not sure why you would not have simly referred to my previous sentence. to spell it out, we put our faith and trust in the staff at that school.

 

and i was talking to that specific poster, who worked with kids.

 

It's the same poster, and considering she's a GAL, your post does make no sense.

Better keep your mouth shut & be thought a fool than open it and remove all doubt.

[H82seaUgo]

It's the same poster, and considering she's a GAL, your post does make no sense.

Better keep your mouth shut & be thought a fool than open it and remove all doubt.

 

if you don't understand, that's fine too.

[San_Antonio_Ex]

I don't mean this to sound snarky at all, but...

 

Titling a thread "Just off Liberty - unruly children a real problem!" is going to have people clicking on it to read a thread about unruly children, and comment etc.

 

If it was titled "Carnival allows the scattering of ashes at sea", and the thread just happened to mention some unruly children, there would have been far fewer posts.

 

If your purpose is not to start threads that you know from experience on CC will be contentious, then it's best not to give it a title that is guaranteed to attract the pot-stirrers.

 

Certainly that isn't an excuse for what has transpired on this thread, but something to think about for future posts if you find these sorts of replies unsavoury.

 

You are correct, of course. I thought about the title, and I honestly don't know why I didn't put "Carnival allows the scattering of ashes at sea" except that it was all and still is all very raw, if you know what I mean.

 

I guess I had forgotten how ugly some people like to get when they are anonymous. :( It is the major reason I quit posting before and probably will again.

[oncruisecontrol]

I very much disagree. For me, there is no vacation from parenting. I have never required anyone to have a curfew. I set my own for my kids.

For me, giving my kids a curfew and them NOT following t would lead to punishment...at home, on a cruise ship or ANYWHERE.

And this is why I never had the problem of disobedience in the first place. My girls knew (from only one or two experiences) that I (and their father) meant business...one or two punishments is all it takes for them to get that....On the other hand, one or two "Oh I don't want to punish them while on vacation" s also let's them learn quickly that they will be able to get off scott free when they aren't home.

NOT the message I would ever want to send.

Absolutely. My parents meant business as well, and we knew it. Consequently, we were not disobedient because we knew what would happen. We respected our parents very much as a result. We would never have stayed out later than what we were allowed to as teenagers. It was not a thought that ever would have crossed our minds. It just would not have been worth it to risk the decent amount of freedom we were given for being obedient and trustworthy kids. Kids who truly respect their parents do so, not because they are supposed to, but because they know without any doubt who is in charge and that there will be consequences. Inconsistent parents who don't follow through each and every time only teach their kids that mommy and daddy rarely mean what they say. So teens rationalize: "well, I really won't get punished, so I'll do what I want". That leads to a weed that is likely difficult to control once allowed to take root.

[halos]

That leads to a weed that is likely difficult to control once allowed to take root.

 

I love the analogy :)

 

Also, I think on the occasions my oldest was punished, the younger one took mental note...needless to say she was less trouble. I credit this to the punishment she saw her sister get that SHE learned from as well. She knew not to try to screw with us.

 

Killing 2 birds with one stone?? Pretty awesome....Real good weed killer right there ;)

 

But, just to keep on subject here...IF God forbid, either of my girls had ever done something that was not something appropriate, and another adult called them on it...I would have NO issue with it. Bottom line is that my girls were with us almost 100% of the time on vacations anyway, so nothing would have gotten by us anyhow.

For some reason, the two of them actually LIKE us....:confused:

odd...;)

:) :)

[Andoria]

I love the analogy :)

 

Also, I think on the occasions my oldest was punished, the younger one took mental note...needless to say she was less trouble. I credit this to the punishment she saw her sister get that SHE learned from as well. She knew not to try to screw with us.

 

Killing 2 birds with one stone?? Pretty awesome....Real good weed killer right there ;)

 

 

I've never been one to dish out punishments. Whenever I tell my son a story of a kid misbehaving he says "You would KILL me if I ever acted like that." I'm not quite sure what would make him think that since he has no siblings or experience. I must look unstable when he pisses me off.

[halos]

I've never been one to dish out punishments. Whenever I tell my son a story of a kid misbehaving he says "You would KILL me if I ever acted like that." I'm not quite sure what would make him think that since he has no siblings or experience. I must look unstable when he pisses me off.

That's cool...a good kid and you don't have to be 'mean'...If you can get all the way through the teen years like that, you have a GOOD thing going' there!!:)

[kerrytens]

Also, I think on the occasions my oldest was punished, the younger one took mental note...needless to say she was less trouble. I credit this to the punishment she saw her sister get ;)

:) :)

I was so one of those younger siblings, thanks to an older sib:D;)

[yj2cute]

Thankyou, Thankyou, Thankyou!!! This is it exactly.

 

I have received my first CC flaming - I now feel truly part of the CC community!

 

Angandboys, I know from reading your posts before we left on our 1st cruise that you had some issues with your kids. I even read your post to my DDs 17 and 14 as an example as to why we were not going to allow any 'cabin visiting'. The girls had the cabin next door to ours and were instructed to be in by 15 mins after their club activities ended. They were asked to phone our cabin to let us know they were in. For the most part the 17 year old did so, but my dd 14 will push and challenge any rule, despite repeated warnings and consequences. How I envy those parents who have compliant kids who will do as they are told!!!

 

Neither myself, or my DH drink, smoke or gamble, so no, we were not in the bars or casino without a care as to where our kids were, we were in our cabin by 12.30pm, after the comedy club or piano bar closed. If I had not had a call from both girls by 1.00am, I would go out on a search of the ship - and it is a very big ship!

 

We have travelled extensively with our girls, visited Europe, USA, Australia, New Zealand, Hong Kong among other places, We want to discover the world with them and learn with them about all the different cultures, people, experiences and landmarks in the world, but this was our 1st cruise. Sure I have learnt some lessons along the way. I thought by using the 'contract' it would help us to ensure our kids did as they were told, and we did 'ground' the 14 year old for 24 hours. This was the day we visited Venice. There were 4 other cruise ships in port that day, and the temperature was 32 degrees. This was the port I was most looking forward to. It was MISERABLE. Hot, crowded, with a teen who refused to walk with us, sulked and demanded McDonalds every 5 minutes. (and no, we don't travel so that she can eat the same food she can get in our local high street!)

 

I hope that maybe DH and I can return there one dayto spend a weekend without the kids (We are from London), as it is a truly beautiful place that deserved better than our DD and the 'family from hell' that day!

 

Believe me, it is true that some kids are easier to parent than others, just be grateful if you have the easy ones, and don't judge us poor folk struggling with the difficult ones!

 

I feel for you having to deal with a PITA teenager. I know it's not pleasant. However, if your DD wants to make everyone on vacation miserable with her disobedience and sulking, it would be her last vacation. I dont know if you have the ability to leave her at home with a grandparent or other trusted adult, but that is exactly what I would do. Vacationing is a luxury, a privilege. Not a right! And unfortunately it doesn't sound as if your 14 yr old DD deserves it. I bet being left behind the next time the rest of the family travels will give her plenty of time to think. It may be harsh, but life is harsh and as parents we have to prepare our kids for adulthood. Not to mention as parents, yes you deserve a pleasant vacation as well and shouldn't have to spend it searching the decks for and fighting with your teenager. I did this very thing myself. After 2 vacations being ruined by my willful teenager, those were her last vacations with me! Now as an adult and parent herself, she understands everything more clearly.

 

Good luck to you, the next few years are going to be challenging. But you are the boss and don't ever let them forget it!

 

Sent from my DROID2 using Tapatalk 2

[Daisyloo]

i very much disagree. For me, there is no vacation from parenting. I have never required anyone to have a curfew. I set my own for my kids.

For me, giving my kids a curfew and them not following t would lead to punishment...at home, on a cruise ship or anywhere.

And this is why i never had the problem of disobedience in the first place. My girls knew (from only one or two experiences) that i (and their father) meant business...one or two punishments is all it takes for them to get that....on the other hand, one or two "oh i don't want to punish them while on vacation" s also let's them learn quickly that they will be able to get off scott free when they aren't home.

Not the message i would ever want to send.

Our rules applied universally...not just within our home.

Yes, i hated punishing my kids and they knew i hated it...but they also knew that i would do it no matter how much i hated it.

 

Now they are grown and my oldest is starting a family. I cannot wait to witness them have to do this now..:p

now is the time i get to be the good guy and do all the spoiling. I paid my dues of being the 'bad cop'...20 years total. It was exhausting and thank god that's over! It totally sucks....but you have to do it. That's part of the job. Nobody said it was going to be easy and if anyone thinks it should be easy, they are not doing it properly.

 

 

like

[scperk]

Thought this post had DIED....must have been 4/5 pages back....YUK....Dennis

[tomsuelaw]

I just have to say that I appreciate 2 things about your post.

 

1st, you acknowledged that you expected a lot of kids. I am always baffled when people on here complain about too many kids on board when they chose to cruise during summer and holiday breaks. I personally have 2 kids I cruise with and I do not mind some kids, but I would not want to cruise with lots of them. I mean kids will be kids, which is exactly the reason they should not be left completely unsupervised unless they can handle themselves.

 

2nd, I like the fact that you did not blame the cruise line. This drives me crazy too. It is not the cruise line's fault that crappy parents or unruly kids booked the same cruise. How can you judge a cruise line based on that? Well, I suppose if you go on a line like HAL it may be so boring that there are no kids :p Oh and I have never been on HAL so take that last statement lightly ;)

[NYOB]

First, condolences on the passing of your mother. Glad to see Carnival was helpful in setting this up. As for the child issue - it stinks, but unless parents step up to police their own kids, probably won't change. Maybe the crew should "capture" the runners/misbehavors, bring them to guest services and page their parents. When the parents show up, issue them a warning. Second warning = confinement to cabin/curfew. Third warning= removal of family from ship. Maybe this would work, and strike fear into parent's hearts! :p:D (and yes, I have kids - my kids have been cruising with us on every cruise since they have been 4 and 7 - they are now 21 and 24!)

Great solution! Hope Carnival is reading your post - or better yet go to their site and put your suggestion on one of the forums.

[missygirl]

So sorry for you loss.

 

We try to cruise at least one time per year and we do do take along children...they are still in Camp Carnival...they problem I found is with the kids 12-17....that is who I have witnessed.