Norwegian Cruise Ship "Loses" Autistic Boy

[Mysticks1]

I was just wondering if there were video cameras at the check-in/out point for the kids club that might have caught the child's exit so that they could have seen how the he was able to get out. It seems like that is something that they would have in place.

[kerrytens]

Rzelden,

 

I wanted to apologize for my previous comments. I have thought about what you went through and I know the fear I'd feel. No parent should have to go through that worry.

 

Life is far too short and precious to judge each other. I'm sorry. I am very glad that your son was found and was safe.

 

Peace to you!

[sdmike]

I don't want a free cruise or money from them, the offer I received was a slap in the face.

 

How can an offer be a slap in the fact if you didn't want stuff from them?

 

Sorry you had a scare

[DMLyons]

How can an offer be a slap in the fact if you didn't want stuff from them?

 

Sorry you had a scare

 

I can't answer for him, but I can tell you what my husband said when he heard about this. "Because they think $1500 is worth my kid's life?" That sums it up. If you screw up, and my kid gets hurt, I don't want your money. I want your head on a fricken platter. Gift wrapped.

 

The people in the kids' club were RESPONSIBLE for this child. They were aware of his needs in advance. Even the poster who noted that other kids wander has a point, in a manner. NO CHILD, autistic or not, should be able to just walk out of the club that way. They told the parents they were able to keep the child from leaving the club. They didn't. THEY screwed up and then offered a lame excuse with no detail of what the actual screw-up was or how it will be avoided in the future, along with this pittance of money off a future cruise? A future cruise where the gent can't be sure his kids will be any MORE safe in their care? It's a joke. Someone really wasn't thinking.

 

That ranks right up there with the restaurant that gave a friend of mine and her son both food poisoning and wanted to make it up to them with vouchers for free food. Makes you wonder what they are thinking.

 

DML

[Junebug27]

As you said no two children with ASD are the same. Very very true, and as the parent you know what is best for your child, whether they can handle something or not. This is true with any parent and child. What happened here really sounds like the kids club didn't keep their end of the bargain.

 

In the NCL forum, myself included at times, people have a tendency to see things through NCL colored glasses, but I can absolutely see their responsibility in this.

[eventamy]

I am so glad that Ben is ok! That must have been a horrifying experience.

 

As an educator who works with children I really feel that his disability is irrelevant. A child was allowed to leave the program unsupervised. I know a lot of children that would attempt this who are not on the spectrum. I am just so glad that Ben was able to get back to his stateroom and was safe there. Thank goodness the steward was there, recognized the situation and was able to remain with him.

We are taking our two daughters on a cruise in June with 6 other members of our family, we will be extra diligent in making sure both girls know what to do and who to go to in case a situation comes up where they find themselves alone.

[DMLyons]

As a parent of a child with autism (who cruises with me), I am ashamed at these parents. All cruiseline's are very upfront with parents about what they can and cannot supply in the kid's club. One on one care is definitely in the 'cannot' group.

 

From both the parent of an autistic child camp AND a former special needs caregiver camp, I find this completely ridiculous. It sounds as if the child didn't need one-on-one care. What he needed was to not be able to just waltz out of the kids' club, and he was allowed to do that by the staff on duty at the time. BIG TIME problem there.

 

It's not the first time I've seen something like this happen, sadly. A land-side child care in VA Beach (about 15 years or so ago) had a setup where the outdoor play area had no locks on the exterior gates (even the simple 4-digit code type that can be opened quickly in an emergency), and had only an eyes-on system of a half dozen staff outside with each "year" of children. The staff ended up not watching one of the gates, and two preschoolers (3 or 4 years old, as memory serves) went right out the gate while the staff were having a smoke break in the far corner of the yard. The two decided to walk to one of their mothers, and they set off down a 4-lane main road (Lynnhaven Parkway, for anyone familiar with VA Beach). They went into the McDonalds and walked right back out without anyone noticing them. (Apparently, they played there and were seeing if either of their mothers were there.) They were found by a real estate agent who saw them walking down the road in this VERY busy area of town over a mile from the day care center. She pulled over, told them she'd call their mothers for them, and she called the police to report it. In the end, only one of the two knew enough to help the police find her mother and get her and the other mother to the station to get them.

 

The difference between that situation and NCL? The day care in the VA Beach case realized the children were missing and, instead of calling the police to report the children missing and start a search for them, decided to falsify the drop-off and pick-up logs to try and hide that the children were ever there. There was jail time involved in that one. From that POV, NCL was "responsible," but not many other ways I can come up with in this situation.

 

DML

[sstrong]

What does the kid being autistic have to do with anything? Sneaking out is an obvious risk for every child, autistic or not. From what I understand, NCL advertises that no children will be allowed to leave the supervised area where this kid was left unless the parents make specific arrangements to allow the child to come and go on his own. It sounds like the parents in this case did not authorize the child to leave by himself. If so, preventing him from leaving isn't a "special need"; it's an advertised service upon which these parents specifically relied. Letting him sneak out was an obvious mistake on NCL's part and his autism has nothing to do with it.

 

It sounds like the parents may have overreacted to the kid going "missing," but who knows what kind of history he has. You'd think a normal 10 year old would be more than capable of safely navigating a cruise ship on his own and finding his way back to his cabin. But if he's prone to dangling precariously from high railings when given the opportunity, then hell yeah the parents are going to freak out when they discover he's alone unsupervised on a cruise ship after the cruise ship promised to supervise him. The moral of the story isn't "don't leave autistic kids in the kids club." The moral is, apparently, you can't be sure NCL will maintain supervision of your kid even if they promise to do so. But you can probably say the same about any babysitting service. Mistakes, though rare, will always happen.

[SissasMomE]

Remove the word "autistic" from the article. Now we are left with a child leaving the kids' program who was not allowed to sign himself in or out. Plain and simple - NCL was wrong and a mistake was made. Luckily, it turned out ok ... but it is still their mistake. Leaving a child in a supervised environment should be exactly what it says it is - a supervised environment. If a child isn't allowed to sign himself in or out, then how on earth was he able to leave? If my child wandered out of a supervised environment, I'd be livid. Whether it's nursey school, day care, or a kids' program on a cruise ship. They were wrong.

[GUEST080219]

I find the idea of a society where children need RFID tags with buzzers or security guards at every entrance quite disturbing. When I look back, at that age I smoked my first cigarette and probably was at places doing things where my parents would have gotten heart attacks if they knew.

 

Moral of the story, when you freak out about stuff like what happened do not let anyone else watch your kids. For the rest I do believe a cruise ship is a pretty safe place for kids to have a nice vacation and test some boundaries.

[GORDONCHICK]

I have problems with both sides:

 

Rzelden - you & your wife know your child better than anyone else, especially on a cruise. There are different levels of autism and different tendencies with each child at each level. If Ben is known to wander or escape, he shouldn't have been in the kids' club, especially during one of the most crowded weeks of cruising in the year. Having worked with autistic children and adults of all levels, at 10/11, this would not be a "new" thing - meaning it's not the 1st time he's disappeared on his own undetected. If he was known to do this, did you talk to the director of the kids' club or at least the person who was over the 10-12 yo group to make them aware of this? Just telling them that he's autistic isn't enough, and I hope you were a little more specific (you probably were, but this wasn't reported so I'm having to guess). This age group typically moves around the ship during the day, so I do find it plausible that Ben could have just walked away from the group during transition. My son was in that age group on the New Year's cruise on the Star, and they actually spent little time IN in the actual kids' club area. In fact, during the day, they were in a conference room completely forward, and would walk through the buffet area and even stop for ice cream on most days.

 

Now, my issue with NCL is that they didn't even notice Ben wasn't with them by the time the parents confronted them about the issue of Ben not being there and not having been checked out. By this time, Ben had gotten to the cabin, and the cabin steward had called his supervisor for guidance and was with Ben when the parents got to the cabin - we don't know how long that was BUT NCL (counselors for the 10-12 yos) should have known he was missing!

 

Now, how many of you were aware that kids this age didn't stay in the kids' area and frequently moved to different areas of the ship during busy cruises????

[room010]

^^^^ Excellent post and I agree with every word.

[Medtech2]

I can't answer for him, but I can tell you what my husband said when he heard about this. "Because they think $1500 is worth my kid's life?" That sums it up. If you screw up, and my kid gets hurt, I don't want your money. I want your head on a fricken platter. Gift wrapped.

 

The people in the kids' club were RESPONSIBLE for this child. They were aware of his needs in advance. Even the poster who noted that other kids wander has a point, in a manner. NO CHILD, autistic or not, should be able to just walk out of the club that way. They told the parents they were able to keep the child from leaving the club. They didn't. THEY screwed up and then offered a lame excuse with no detail of what the actual screw-up was or how it will be avoided in the future, along with this pittance of money off a future cruise? A future cruise where the gent can't be sure his kids will be any MORE safe in their care? It's a joke. Someone really wasn't thinking.

 

That ranks right up there with the restaurant that gave a friend of mine and her son both food poisoning and wanted to make it up to them with vouchers for free food. Makes you wonder what they are thinking.

 

DML

The child did not get hurt. They were offered $1500 which would pretty much pay for another cruise for them if they did an inside.

 

The cruise line says they have taken steps to make sure this does not happen again. At the very least the crew were reamed out and at the worst someone may have been fired. They are looking at their procedures and are under no obligation to run it by these parents. It is now an internal security/quality control issue.

 

Now, it would be interesting to see if other parents can report on any changes but at this point these parents need to let it go. The boy was safe in the cabin before they even knew he was gone. What ifs will kill you...

[dwjoe]

Talk about a misleading headline. What site am I at, Fox News?

This issue is heated enough without people inflaming it with political remarks.

[HokiePoq]

I am the parent mentioned in this story. Shame on all of you that blast me, my family and especially my son. The kids club knew of his disability and confirmed that he was welcome there. By doing so, they accepted responsibility for his safety. The only blame here should be on the cruise line, not me or my wife or my son. I don't want a free cruise or money from them, the offer I received was a slap in the face. What I want is to tell people about what happened, to hopefully educate people that holiday cruises may not be the best place for children because the kids clubs are almost always under staffed. When you have a large crowd, especially children, I think the cruise line should have a security officer posted at the entrance/exit instead of people who are not trained well enough for security issues. Security is used to enter and exit the ship, why not at the kids club too? Potentially, you can have 100's of kids in their at any given time, so posting security makes perfect sense to me, but what do I know, I'm just a parent who's child was able to walk out somehow. I just wish people could see that NCL is to blame here, no one else. Those of you who posted positive comments, I appreciate your comments. Those of you who posted negatively, your comments are hurtful, but this is an open forum to post your comments as well, and I understand that. Just take a second before writing your hurtful comments and put yourself in my shoes before you hit submit.

 

It was my understanding he was in the Teen Club. The Kids Club is a different story. I apologize. A sign in and sign out with secured doors is a reasonable expectation. Not knowing the condition of your child, posters cannot say whether it was reasonable or not to leave him there.

I am glad he is okay.

[bonvoyagie]

While I could not tell you the age group, I have seen many of the kids club groups out and about on the ship - once on the Sky they made paper airplanes and were launching them in the Atrium from the upper decks - what a sight - and mess.

 

On the Pearl last summer they did an ice cream and cakey cake "rap" number before the early show one night - then the next day they were in the Garden Cafe singing it again and getting ice cream and cake :D.

 

Now for the incedent at hand - I agree that an error was made on the part of the Kids Crew staff. The times I have seen them out and about they always had a staffer in front, and back of the group. We all know that a moment of distraction is all it takes for a child to wander off un seen - autistic or not. We do not know if it happend while in the confines of the club or not. We also don't know if by chance the club was understaffed that night. The room steward is the real hero here and really went above and beyond to insure the childs safety. His supervisor should have also tried to contact you in the dining venue you were at - they know where you are since they swipe your room key as you enter any of the dining places (except the buffet). You should not have had to return to your room to find your son. The Kids Club should have also tried to sent someone to retrive your son and take him back to the club. To that end we don't know all of the timing of events and how long your son was actually missing. It could have been just a few minutes - neither you or the article said.

 

I can understand why both sides are acting like they are - NCL wants to keep it as an isolated incident and you want to not let them forget it. You were hurt and there is nothing that will make you feel any better. You son was safe and sound - you need to trust that NCL has punished the people responsible and have looked into the loophole that allowed the situation to happen in the first place. Somehow they have not convinced you of that - or you would not still be so angry 2 months later.

 

It is time to forgive, forget and move on.

[IWORK2CRUISE]

Remove the word "autistic" from the article. Now we are left with a child leaving the kids' program who was not allowed to sign himself in or out. Plain and simple - NCL was wrong and a mistake was made. Luckily, it turned out ok ... but it is still their mistake. Leaving a child in a supervised environment should be exactly what it says it is - a supervised environment. If a child isn't allowed to sign himself in or out, then how on earth was he able to leave? If my child wandered out of a supervised environment, I'd be livid. Whether it's nursey school, day care, or a kids' program on a cruise ship. They were wrong.

That is the real point!

Thankfully, the OP had a conscientious cabin steward who thought to enquire and remained with the boy.

I know that the offer of OBC can't truly make up for the error in judgement but they have gotten their point across by posting. Hopefully, the system will be improved and others will not experience the same trauma.

[sugarking]

Thank goodness Ben is ok. NCL should adopt Disney's kids program. I have sailed with them four times and no child gets in or out without the staff checking their wrist ban.

[kerrytens]

Now, how many of you were aware that kids this age didn't stay in the kids' area and frequently moved to different areas of the ship during busy cruises????

I did not know that at all. Thanks for making us aware of that fact.

[conandrob240]

OMG- are some of you out of your freakin' minds?!?!?! A child ( it matters none that he is autistic) was able to walk out of the supposedly secure children's club. Not only was that bad enough but the " solution" was to tell a cabin steward who may have had absolutely no child care experience and may not even have had proper child care background screening to "watch over him"??!?!?! ***?!?!!

[Mistizoom]

I have a 10 year old and I would be livid if he was allowed to leave the kids' club without permission and without them even knowing he was missing! I guess the cabin steward and supervisor perhaps had no idea he was supposed to be in the kids' club, so I don't place any blame on them. Still confused if Ben was found in his own room or a stranger's room? Glad he was ok.

[Guest LoveMyBoxer]

Thank goodness Ben is ok. NCL should adopt Disney's kids program. I have sailed with them four times and no child gets in or out without the staff checking their wrist ban.

 

Suggest you google Disney Cruise line lost child, you'd be surprised what comes up!

[boaterette]

The son was not harmed. NCL took corrective action. I just don't understand the greed. They want more compensation. Why should they get any at all? How in the world will a free cruise change what they felt. They didn't even have any idea he had escaped the kids club till they got back to their cabin. It's not like they were worried or anything.

[Travelbyrob]

Misleading title!!!!!

 

The child was in thier cabin.

 

What about all those other unattended children running up and down the stairs and playing in the elevators that many of us have encountered along our travels. Are they lost?

[GORDONCHICK]

Actually, it's a misleading title because the ship (an inanimate object) cannot lose someone. No more than a gun shoots someone.