Formal Dining Dress Code Enforcement - Lack Thereof

[cavkc]

I'm curious as to how many men even take a single buttoned down shirt on a cruise.

 

I love dressing up, my DH indulges me and wears his tux, but it doesn't bother me what other people wear, I just want thenice pics :-)

 

We were once invited to dine with the Captain on formal night (this was celebrity), everyone at the table looked lovely, apart from one person. A middle aged gentleman at the table was wearing a jumper that looked like the dog that slept on it, I kid you not, it even had holes at the elbow!! Again didn't bother me, but he did stand out from the rest of the table.

[runawaysoul]

I wear nice polo shirt and business casual pants on non formal nights, and a well tailored suit for formal nights. I would like to see the script get flipped - what if all the servers wore what they wanted, and their service no better than a trip to McDonald's?

[payankee]

I'm curious as to how many men even take a single buttoned down shirt on a cruise.

 

I love dressing up, my DH indulges me and wears his tux, but it doesn't bother me what other people wear, I just want thenice pics :-)

 

We were once invited to dine with the Captain on formal night (this was celebrity), everyone at the table looked lovely, apart from one person. A middle aged gentleman at the table was wearing a jumper that looked like the dog that slept on it, I kid you not, it even had holes at the elbow!! Again didn't bother me, but he did stand out from the rest of the table.

My husband takes a sport coat and sometimes a suit. Never a tux, not even for our wedding. I take sparkly things but not dresses. We can't control what others wear but sometimes they do stand out. Formal night on a riverboat cruise we took 2 yrs ago and some guy worse shorts and a tee shirt and his wife, jeans and a tee shirt. He said it's his vacation and he'll dress the way he wants to.

[Clarea]

I'm curious as to how many men even take a single buttoned down shirt on a cruise.....

Still take buttoned down shirts.

[MURPHY'S MUM]

Ok, time for me to stir the pot a little and vent also. I see a lot of folks in this forum who've been cruising for years so I'd like to see what they have to say about it.

 

Last year I went on my very first cruise. Took the Radiance OTS to Alaska. This was my first cruise, so I didn't know what to expect. Needless to say I enjoyed it immensely. The only fly in the ointment (actually more like a hornet) was what is referred to as "Formal" night in the dining room. I was part of a extended family group, of which included my sister-in-law and her husband, who are experienced cruisers. When she informed me of the dress requirements for dinner on these nights I was extremely upset. I feel that I'm on a vacation, not a business trip. After raising several levels of hell (and my blood pressure) over it, I relented and packed my suit along with a couple dress shirts and tie. :(

 

When the time came, I dutifully put on my suit, dress shoes & shirt, and a tie along with the rest of my party and walked down to the dining room. There were a lot of other folks also in their "Sunday Best". But I also saw a lot of others dressed little better than beach bums who were also allowed to enter and be seated. Needless to say I was about to come unglued! I felt like I'd been played for a fool!:mad: I guess the staff didn't have the gonads to say anything to these folks.

 

If anyone from RCCL management (current or former)monitors this forum, I'd love to hear what they have to say!

I feel exactly the same. We've been cruising for 20 years and find that fewer and fewer passengers are choosing to dress up on the formal nights. I don't blame them. Why bother? It's just an excuse for the ship to sell you photographs.

 

We saw a US Veteran in all his formal regalia and he looked fabulous. The Captain walked straight past him without even a handshake. Outrageous!

 

Years ago, it was an occasion - entertainment round the tables - better show in the theatre, etc. Nowadays - nothing!

 

Imagine the excess baggage for us when carrying our posh frocks and dinner suits all the way from the UK.

 

In summary though, RCL was the cheapest cruise we've ever taken and I know that other cruise lines are more into their formalities, in general. So my advice is to remember it's YOUR holiday and YOUR money and you should do what makes you happy.

 

Grrrrrrrrrr! :o)

[TravelerThom]

I'm curious as to how many men even take a single buttoned down shirt on a cruise...

I think I've figured out that we are probably two people separated by a common language;)

 

To me in standard USA usage "buttoned down shirt" means that the collar points are attached to the shirt with buttons (and there may or may not be a button attaching the edge of the collar to the back of the shirt); I consider these shirts to be less formal than shirts that are not "buttoned down".

 

Are you referring to a shirt that has buttons on the front of the shirt (versus a pull over shirt)? If I had a name for that, it would be a "buttoned up shirt". I am not claiming logic for any of this - just musing over differences in language.

 

Most of the shirts I take on a cruise are both buttoned up the front and also have buttoned down collars. On more formal nights I typically wear a buttoned up and down:p oxford cloth shirt with a blazer. This is "acceptable" to the woman I am most concerned with (even though she would prefer to have me bring my tux), and perhaps is not too offensive to those dressing at both the high and low ends of formal.

 

Thom

[cavkc]

I think I've figured out that we are probably two people separated by a common language;)

 

To me in standard USA usage "buttoned down shirt" means that the collar points are attached to the shirt with buttons (and there may or may not be a button attaching the edge of the collar to the back of the shirt); I consider these shirts to be less formal than shirts that are not "buttoned down".

 

Are you referring to a shirt that has buttons on the front of the shirt (versus a pull over shirt)? If I had a name for that, it would be a "buttoned up shirt". I am not claiming logic for any of this - just musing over differences in language.

 

Most of the shirts I take on a cruise are both buttoned up the front and also have buttoned down collars. On more formal nights I typically wear a buttoned up and down:p oxford cloth shirt with a blazer. This is "acceptable" to the woman I am most concerned with (even though she would prefer to have me bring my tux), and perhaps is not too offensive to those dressing at both the high and low ends of formal.

 

Thom

 

Oh I see, DH has both and yes the 'button up' has buttons that attach the collar to the shirt ... your right I consider them to be less formal. I don't even think we differentiate in the UK, although I could be wrong on this one. We would call a shirt that goes over your head a 'polo shirt'.

 

I could live with him dressing that way on formal night .... don't tell him though :p

[Sitzmark]

I'm curious as to how many men even take a single buttoned down shirt on a cruise.

 

I love dressing up, my DH indulges me and wears his tux, but it doesn't bother me what other people wear, I just want thenice pics :-)

 

We were once invited to dine with the Captain on formal night (this was celebrity), everyone at the table looked lovely, apart from one person. A middle aged gentleman at the table was wearing a jumper that looked like the dog that slept on it, I kid you not, it even had holes at the elbow!! Again didn't bother me, but he did stand out from the rest of the table.

 

Wouldn't even consider it. I'm not worried about dining with the captain as I'm sure our decision to decline an invite wouldn't bother him.

[I&J Cruisers]

Why are we discussing this again? This ship has sailed. What is impossible to explain to those that have never experienced it is the ambiance that used to be palpable on a ship on formal nights when every one was dressed up. It was very enjoyable but it's over. We need to move on.

[Sitzmark]

Why are we discussing this again? This ship has sailed. What is impossible to explain to those that have never experienced it is the ambiance that used to be palpable on a ship on formal nights when every one was dressed up. It was very enjoyable but it's over. We need to move on.

 

Why do you think it's impossible to explain? I see people explain it over and over.

[DrD]

Welcome to CC. If you spend some time on here you'll notice that "dress code" threads are only outnumbered by tipping threads (or more recently mattress threads:eek:). This issue has been discussed a lot.

 

Formal night dress is a suggestion and as you found out many folks don't adhere to the suggestion. Now you know, you don't need to pack formal wear for the next cruise if you don't want to.:cool:

 

But at least the smoking threads are gone.

[DrD]

I feel exactly the same. We've been cruising for 20 years and find that fewer and fewer passengers are choosing to dress up on the formal nights. I don't blame them. Why bother? It's just an excuse for the ship to sell you photographs.

 

We saw a US Veteran in all his formal regalia and he looked fabulous. The Captain walked straight past him without even a handshake. Outrageous!

 

Years ago' date=' it was an occasion - entertainment round the tables - better show in the theatre, etc. Nowadays - nothing!

 

Imagine the excess baggage for us when carrying our posh frocks and dinner suits all the way from the UK.

 

In summary though, RCL was the cheapest cruise we've ever taken and I know that other cruise lines are more into their formalities, in general. So my advice is to remember it's YOUR holiday and YOUR money and you should do what makes you happy.

 

Grrrrrrrrrr! :o)[/quote']

 

Actually it's our money and our holiday too.

 

By your logic, I should be able to cut you in line, smoke on my balcony, and do whatever makes me feel good even if it makes others feel bad.

 

Sad that society has degraded to this point. what happened to curtesy and consideration? Aren't we supposed to think about others?

[poncho1973]

But at least the smoking threads are gone.

 

On that topic, I'm just waiting for the return of those people who claimed smokers support the entire cruise industry and smoking bans would cripple the lines beyond being able to support themselves.

 

It's been a couple of years now. I'm waiting for the bankruptcies and fire sales.

[DrD]

On that topic, I'm just waiting for the return of those people who claimed smokers support the entire cruise industry and smoking bans would cripple the lines beyond being able to support themselves.

 

It's been a couple of years now. I'm waiting for the bankruptcies and fire sales.

 

Fire sales haha.

 

I wouldn't hold my breath, people almost never admit they were wrong, especially when they expressed their opinion vehemently as so many did.

 

But I'm glad the controvery is over. smokers never bothered me that much, but the fact that they were ignoring the rules did. I suspect many of them are now vaping in their cabins.

[SargassoPirate]

My choice of dress for nights when formal attire is suggested is sometimes a factor of what I'll be doing and where I'll be before and/or after the cruise. If it's strictly a cruise trip, I am more likely to pack a suit. If we'll be on land for an extended period before or after the cruise, such as before or after a transatlantic or transpacific, I am more likely to pack a pair of nice slacks, a dress shirt, and tie for formal nights - sort of the "I just slipped off my jacket while I eat" look for the MDR.

 

For example, we have an upcoming travel extravaganza where we'll be doing a 17 day cruise, then a month of train travel to various cities around the continent, followed by a 28 day cruise back to North America. There's no way I'm going to lug formal wear around for the 30 days we'll be riding the rails and checking in and out of various hotels.

 

I figure as long as I'm in slacks and a nice dress shirt and tie on formal nights, I'll blend in. Anyway, the attention will be on the guy in the T-shirt wearing his ballcap through dinner while he picks his nose and plays games on his cellphone during dinner. He'll be ruining the cruise for the "clothes police", not me.;)

[TravelerThom]

...I figure as long as I'm in slacks and a nice dress shirt and tie on formal nights, I'll blend in. Anyway, the attention will be on the guy in the T-shirt wearing his ballcap through dinner while he picks his nose and plays games on his cellphone during dinner. He'll be ruining the cruise for the "clothes police", not me.;)

Actually the guy in a wife-beater and sideways ballcap will draw attention away from your guy in the T-shirt:p I think you and I are sufficiently in the middle to escape major ire...

[beachchick]

We sailed Radiance in Alaska a couple years ago, and we found that for that sailing, guests were MUCH less likely to dress formally than on our previous warm-weather sailings.

 

I concluded that it had much to do with the itinerary. Alaska sailings seemed to us to be much more about the scenery and the ports than shipboard life. That was certainly the case for us. Also, people need to bring warmer clothes, leaving less room for formal wear.

 

Just my observation.

 

That is similar to our experience with an end-of-the-season 4 day Canada cruise (prior to repo for the winter). We were newbies with only 2 other cruises at the time and, even though we had a week in Vancouver before and a week in Seattle with our daughter after, we packed a suit for hubby and a long cocktail dress with all the "add ons" for me. Our table mates turned out to be less than an enjoyable, so we did Chops on formal night and casual the last night (yes, everyone, we found our MDR servers and tipped them personally). In Chops, only 1/2 the passengers were dressed as we were. It's okay though because we looked good and enjoyed ourselves. I suppose the upside of a cooler weather cruise is that there aren't many shorts or t-shirts worn day-to-day or in the evening, but lots of long pants/slacks and long sleeved shirts.

 

We don't really care what others wear, but I do think it's rude to come to formal night or really any night in the MDR--even if the evening's attire is only suggested--in shorts and a tank top. Have some self respect and wear slacks and a collared shirt at least. That's just basic manners.

 

I have to admit that the last time we did the whole formal deal with tuxes for the men and long cocktail gowns for the ladies was an anniversary cruise we took with my sister and BIL. Now hubby brings slacks, dress shirt, tie, and dark v-neck cashmere sweater and I bring a simpler dress and short heels (my docs won't allow high ones anymore:(). We started doing alternative dining on formal nights and wear those outfits then and through the evening (though hubby takes off the tie after dinner; fair enough with me as he's worn quite enough ties and tuxes in his life). It's our personal compromise with what works for us now, while not being total slobs. On non-formal nights, it's been casual slacks (not jeans) for hubby with collared shirt and sweater if it's chilly, and slacks or skirt with nice top or everyday dress for me since we started cruising. Our choice. And while I might privately roll my eyes at someone slobbish going to the MDR or what have you on formal nights, I don't think more than 3 seconds about it before moving on with whatever we are doing.

 

I guess my advice is to wear what is comfortable while not forgetting that manners matter. Is it really that hard to put on slacks, tie, and jacket for a few hours? Is it really so trying to pack one decent dress or dressy pants outfit? Nah. Some people simply don't care. They are the same people you see everywhere in life who have the attitude of "It's all about what I want, the heck with everyone else."

 

Okay, personal rant finished. And crud, now I am once again missing cruising even more. This whole bad health thing really sucks sometimes. Well, maybe it's time to ask the docs if we can go ahead and plan at least a short one. It's been too long.

 

beachchick

Edited February 10, 2016 by beachchick

[gek]

We saw a US Veteran in all his formal regalia and he looked fabulous. The Captain walked straight past him without even a handshake. Outrageous!

 

I'm confused. Why should the Captain stop to shake someone's hand just because they are dressed in a military uniform?

[Aussieflyer]

I'm confused. Why should the Captain stop to shake someone's hand just because they are dressed in a military uniform?

 

In fact, the captain will not shake hands with anyone - risk of infection.

[NYOB]

Having been on twenty-six cruises, I have never been able to understand why some folks concern themselves with what others choose to wear. What others wear has no impact on the enjoyment of my cruise whatsoever. I am too busy relaxing, and enjoying my meal and me darling wife's company. And for those who concern themselves with such things, I have never worn a hat or wife beater shirt to the MDR nor have I worn shorts or t-shirts to dinner. On the so called formal nights, I choose to wear a shirt with tie, dark slacks, a jacket and shined shoes, but it is my choice.

Agree! VERY well said.

[CrusinAgain]

Having been on twenty-six cruises, I have never been able to understand why some folks concern themselves with what others choose to wear. What others wear has no impact on the enjoyment of my cruise whatsoever. I am too busy relaxing, and enjoying my meal and me darling wife's company. And for those who concern themselves with such things, I have never worn a hat or wife beater shirt to the MDR nor have I worn shorts or t-shirts to dinner. On the so called formal nights, I choose to wear a shirt with tie, dark slacks, a jacket and shined shoes, but it is my choice.

 

Like button....agreed!

[awhcruiser]

Bingo.

Well resent it all you want, but you've supported the cruiseline industry by sailing on over 25 cruises so yes you indeed are part of the problem not the solution when it comes to tipping. The auto tipping is in play because there are too many people that would walk away from tipping at all.

 

Wowza.

[iconions]

My DW and I are taking our first cruise in October on Liberty to the western Caribbean. I'm looking at it as a chance, in the evenings, to have 7 really neat date nights with my lovely bride of 33+ years. We're planning to dress up on the two suggested formal nights - I'll be in a suit, she in a cocktail dress. The other nights I'll be in a sport coat and polo, she in something amazing as always. The best thing? These are OUR date nights and really, I don't give a flip what others are wearing, (well, that is a lie, please, if you are a hairy man, please wear more than a speedo and flip-flops to dinner! No one NEEDS to see that while trying to enjoy a meal! LOL!!!!).

 

Seriously, my enjoyment of this first cruise is NOT going to be determined on whether or not some Joe Schmoe is wearing the suggested dress for the dinner. I just hope, if they are table mates, that they are engaging and just a little bit FUN! [/speech]

 

Now, dang it, someone make it October so I can get my happy backside on the derned boat and get that frou-frou drink with the umbrella in my hand! :D

[pjnj40]

Speaking of vacation, do you think you will walk into a 5 star restaurant during your vacation? I don't think so because they will kick you out till come in nicely. That the idea of getting dress. It like going to wedding party. Have fun getting dress. be nice with other. You only wearing it for two hours. Show your Pride!!! I hate being formal, but i don't mind it because i need a change in my appearance and want to look nice. Yo Op i am sure she pressured you because she don't want to see you like a slob.

[yuvraj]

I am not comfortable with cruise lines enforcing a dress code. P&O and Cunard do this and it puts you off from choosing them.

 

The problem is that on the recent I and my group dressed up but not many others did. It meant that we stuck out and I actually had to go back and change after dinner.

 

To that extent I am disappointed with the effort others made on formal night. Perhaps RCI need to ditch formal nights or indicate it as optional.