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What do you like and/or dislike about sharing a table with strangers?

Hey Tina

By Hey Tina,
in Ask a Cruise Question

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bUU

bUU

Posted
Posted
Why do you feel the need to offer your interfaith blessing?
Because I respect and afford consideration to all people at the table, rather than just the Christians, and so seek a middle ground, rather than any extreme.
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Strophic

Strophic

Posted
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Doesn't matter what their motivation is, confrontation shouldn't be the natural reaction. Take the high road and set a positive example for uncomfortable situations. Everyone will be grateful. A polite patient tone is a show of respect and integrity.

 

Burt

 

Who said anything about confrontation? If someone asks me to say grace with them I am going to say no. It's not confrontational to simply not participate in a prayer when asked.

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Beachdude

Beachdude

Posted
Posted
Who said anything about confrontation? If someone asks me to say grace with them I am going to say no. It's not confrontational to simply not participate in a prayer when asked.

""If someone offered to say grace at my table I would say "no worries." Why do you feel the need to offer your interfaith blessing? Is it better than theirs?""

 

"No worries" is polite. "Why do you feel the need to offer your interfaith blessing" is confrontational.

 

Burt

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Itchy&Scratchy Great Review Rare

Itchy&Scratchy

Posted
Posted
Why make us feel inferior and that there is something fundamentally wrong with us because we choose to spend 90-120 minutes to ourselves, going back over what we did for the day???
to each his own. My hubs, kid and I spend every waking moment on the ship together, so we don't mind some new company at the table in MDR.

 

We only had one bad experience, with an elderly lady that dominated the conversation at the table at a very high sound volume. She kept talking and talking and talking and talking only about herself and her past life, and didn't let anybody else utter a word. The next day everyone else obviously asked to be transferred to a different table, because she and her boyfriend were the only ones at the table.

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Tatka

Tatka

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If I was a solo cruiser I'd probably want to join a large table, but with my husband we have enough topics to discuss. We actually pretty comfortable with each othere even without talking.

Just like in land based restaurants.

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slidergirl

slidergirl

Posted
Posted
If someone offered to say grace at my table I would say "no worries." Why do you feel the need to offer your interfaith blessing? Is it better than theirs?

 

To offer to say grace and make it interfaith is a way to, without confrontation, not make a boastful, self-centered, blessing ignoring the possibility that not everyone at the table is an Evangelical, born-again, Catholic, Baptist, LDS, Methodist, Jew, Muslim, Agnostic, Atheist...

 

Didn't the Bible say something about not being boastful and proud, but to go into a closet and quietly pray?

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navybankerteacher

navybankerteacher

Posted
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As a public service:

 

"Let us be thankful to each other for this good company and let us be grateful to those who grew this food and prepared this meal we are about to share."

 

It is hard to imagine anyone being uncomfortable with this - as much as anything else, it is thanking tablemates for their company.

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Beachdude

Beachdude

Posted
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Thanks bUU for a very good all inclusive grace. My hats off to you.

 

However, I find that most responses to this discussion aren't as offended by content of the prayer as they are by the request for participation. Makes me wonder if they are offended to participate in a toast, or participating as a table with the dancing waiters (which I hate by the way). It appears to me that the religious context is what offends so many.

 

I admit we all have our limits to social inclusion, even at an evening meal on a ship with strangers. But how we respond speaks more about us than those who we struggle to tolerate.

 

Burt

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Strophic

Strophic

Posted
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People are being very generous with the word "offended."

 

"Would you like to join us in saying grace?"

 

"No thanks."

Is that really what being offended is? Is the bar for being offended that low?

 

Yes, there is a difference between participating in a religious ritual and clapping for a singing waiter. And I would never in my life think to ask someone to participate in the latter anyway? If someone doesn't want to clap for singing waiters, they can do what they want. I will clap or not clap depending on how I feel and not concern myself with what the other people at the table are doing.

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pseudoware

pseudoware

Posted
Posted

"Nah, I'm good. You guys go ahead and pray. I'm gonna slap some butter on a slice of bread while it's still warm and wash it down with a sip of wine. Thanks, though.

 

"For tomorrow, you guys mind if we snag the seats you're in tonight? Also, I was gonna have the maitre d announce our arrival to the table. Can you guys take a video for us? Cool."

 

Sent from my SM-G950U1 using Tapatalk

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Beachdude

Beachdude

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People are being very generous with the word "offended."

 

Is that really what being offended is? Is the bar for being offended that low?

 

Yes, there is a difference between participating in a religious ritual and clapping for a singing waiter. And I would never in my life think to ask someone to participate in the latter anyway? If someone doesn't want to clap for singing waiters, they can do what they want. I will clap or not clap depending on how I feel and not concern myself with what the other people at the table are doing.

 

I'm not sure what your point is with this post, but I disagree that there are differences in types of social invitations. Different folks have different aversions for group participations. You could easily use "X" in place of the group request because someone would rather not participate in some request at your table. If you don't believe that, you might find yourself "offended" one day when someone says "no, why should I?" to singing happy birthday to your spouse or child.

 

We are all at risk of tripping over ourselves when we ask for a collective participation among a group of strangers. It's natural and normal. However, how we respond in those situations defines our character.

 

Burt

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Strophic

Strophic

Posted
Posted

The difference is that religion is a personal and divisive topic, singing waiters are not. If I invite you to a rally for my favorite political candidate, would it be fair to paint you as offended and asocial for politely declining? I'm sorry but saying grace at dinner just does not have anything to do with dancing waiters or singing happy birthday. They are very different things, no matter how broad a brush you wish to paint with.

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Beachdude

Beachdude

Posted
Posted
The difference is that religion is a personal and divisive topic, singing waiters are not. If I invite you to a rally for my favorite political candidate, would it be fair to paint you as offended and asocial for politely declining? I'm sorry but saying grace at dinner just does not have anything to do with dancing waiters or singing happy birthday. They are very different things, no matter how broad a brush you wish to paint with.

 

Then I'm sure you do agree that we disagree on this. And your missing the point. It's not whether you decline any invitation, but how you respectfully decline to the person who requested, or at the very least, not be confrontational.

 

Burt

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Beachdude

Beachdude

Posted
Posted
You specifically quoted my comment in which the declination was phrased as a simple and polite, "No thanks," so I feel like it's you who is missing the point as hard as one possibly can.

I can't find that quote. But I think "no thanks" is somewhat respectful. Not sure what you are saying.

 

Burt

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DirtyDawg

DirtyDawg

Posted
Posted
As a public service:

 

"Let us be thankful to each other for this good company and let us be grateful to those who grew this food and prepared this meal we are about to share."

 

I like that one. So much so I might just borrow it sometime. ;) No worries though, I'll buy you a drink as compensation.:D

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Cuervosar

Cuervosar

Posted
Posted

Here's my deal. I'm not religious at all. If somebody wants to pray at my table, bust it out. I want to hear the best your religion has to offer. Should be interesting, won't bother me in the least.

 

That's why I'm confused by home-style and his generic prayer.

 

Mr. Religious Person; "Mind if we pray?"

 

Home-style "Not all all but how about we substitute my interdenominational non offensive PC homily instead, I don't think your prayer will be as appropriate. "

 

Weak sauce. Just let the first group do their thing. Then do yours. Then I'll toast Andy Kaufman.

 

So many people so easily offended.

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