Balconies and tables for two

Fair disclosure - I am a widower so I travel solo. My observation over the past several years is that with the major advent of individual balconies social interaction on board ships has diminished and the greater demand for tables for two are in a way puzzling. I understand with the stress of everyone working excessive hours (those who can afford to cruise) one might wish to have down time with their significant other. However the trend seems to have gone beyond that factor. Are people so intimidated that meeting a stranger or two or three or horrors of horrors a table full is not fun? or have we as a society gotten so into our cell phones et al that we have no desire nor ability to interact in real time?

Comments?

I guess it depends on your reasons for travelling.

I don't travel to make small talk with people I am unlikely to ever see again. I travel to spend time with my husband and kids. We have intensely busy lives with my husband away a lot and three additional teens living with us day to day for 90% of the year. So that time when its just the five of us is so so precious to us.

As my eldest embarks on the rocky seas of the teenager years, that simple dinner time conversation can be a window into his mind. Ditto with the younger two. And when everyone is relaxed and open after spending time together during the day, that is when we have our best and most insightful conversations. This is OUR time as a family and we grow from that and form stronger bonds that we nourish so they can last.

Its also personality based, I guess. Both my husband and I are extroverted introverts. We are fine interacting socially but much prefer our own company than taking our chances to see if we will end up with people we can tolerate.

At the end of the day, cruise lines cater to what their customers want, and more and more people want tables for two and private spaces on the ship (individual balconies).

Times change and so do needs. Originally these big boats were for necessary transport around the world. Now they are for holidaying. Does that mean we should bewail the fact that so few people are choosing to take a transatlantic but are instead happy to putter around the Caribbean?

To summarise, my personal perspective is that I'm not at all intimidated by meeting a stranger but I really prefer to spend time with my family instead of making small talk to someone I won't see again. And whilst I (and the rest of my family) are firmly devoted to our electronic devices, our family rule is 'not at the table' - instead we enjoy interacting with each other.

We have looked! Never found a balcony in our inside cabin ; )

We have, however, found lovely tablemates, during shipboard time, and enjoyed their company on a nightly basis.

On the other hand, DH and I also prefer to have breakfast/lunch in the MDR, seated at a table for two.

I agree there are a number of reasons people have different preferences. It seems to make sense for Cunard to offer a number of table-size options.

I wonder if the new single cabins on the QM2 will result in a change in the mix. It seems as if larger tables result in more people in less floor space.

Does anyone else think there might actually be a reduction in tables-for-two after the refit?

We have done one TA which was part of our honeymoon trip - we requested a table for 6 and our tablemates were lovely.

We dine at tables for two in restaurants at home almost weekly so dining with strangers was part of the adventure for us.

The traditional large table in the MDR was part of the experience we wanted and we would do it that way again.

It's good that the ships can cater for various needs and desires.

I don't think it's that people are intimidated by strangers, it's more than they don't want to be bothered to interact with them. It's easier to be on their own.

When we started cruising, cabins were small, no balconies, so people used the public spaces. I remember in the Lido on QE2, there was an unwritten rule that if someone asked "may I join you?" you only said no if you were waiting for friends or family to join you. If there were seats available, you said, "Yes, please sit down." And maybe all you did was chat about "is this your first time on the ship?" etc. But so what? Any of the conversations I can remember from those lunches were no more trivial than the drivel that people feel compelled to share with the entire world with their facetweets.

We always ask for a large table. Discounting the times we traveled with friends or family, I'd guess we've sat with strangers 40 times. I know people worry about getting bad table companions, but we've had great luck. In all those times, I recall one very snobby lady who I decided to find funny rather than annoying, and one social climber who left our table like a shot when a space opened up at an officer's table (the rest of us had a great time without her). Did all our table companions become BFFs? No, but we have stayed in touch with some people we've met on cruises. And we've never asked the maître d' to move us to another table.

I know people say that they don't see the point in interacting with people they'll never see again. But why not? People are interesting, and you never know what you're going to learn.

Two crossings ago, we sat with two couples from very different backgrounds. Once couple had traveled very little. The other couple had lived in several different countries and traveled extensively, but cruised very little. We were sort of in the middle, having cruised a lot, but always lived in the same town. On the face of it, you might wonder what we'd find to talk about. But we had a great time, and were often among the last few tables out of the MDR.

On our recent crossing, we sat with two couples with a great deal in common with us. Similar educational backgrounds (5 of the 6 of us in science). One couple had lived in a town near us and the wife had worked in a business in our town. Another wonderful time, with plenty to talk about.

I hate to sound like a grumpy old lady, but I see a general decrease in interest in other people, which leads to a decrease in civility and consideration. I'm inclined to blame some of this on people's hectic lives--they're too busy to be considerate, just watch how they drive and how they act in stores. If I hold a door for someone, I figure at best I've got a 50-50 chance of hearing "thank you." And I blame some of the disinterest in others on the insular nature of lives that revolve around cell phones and selfie sticks.

I think most of my disinterest revolves around the fact I have young kids. You will never find me lacking in good manners or consideration but lengthy dinner time conversation with other adults is something that is much more likely when I'm not travelling with my boys.

And I expect that will be the case for most families travelling with kids. Which I guess is fine since it seems the reaction of most kid-free cruisers is to turn pale and slip the maitre d $20 to change tables. [emoji13]

I think most of my disinterest revolves around the fact I have young kids. You will never find me lacking in good manners or consideration but lengthy dinner time conversation with other adults is something that is much more likely when I'm not travelling with my boys.

 

And I expect that will be the case for most families travelling with kids. Which I guess is fine since it seems the reaction of most kid-free cruisers is to turn pale and slip the maitre d $20 to change tables. [emoji13]

I can see when you're traveling with family you'd want to have time together. But OP was asking about the increased interest in tables for two, which is not your situation.

Like you, Lakesregion, I usually travel solo and enjoy sitting with the same group of people in the MDR for dinner. I eat my dinners alone almost all the time at home so I look forward to meeting new people on a ship.

I can understand certain circumstances where people might want to eat at a table for two. I hope though, that we are not coming to the point where people don't want to socialize onboard.

We always request a table for 2 (and always got one). This is for two reasons: first, we like to have quality time on our own, and second, we do not want to interact with other passengers.

The second reason deserves an explanation, as we both have different reasons for it. For myself, I interact with lots of people the whole year long, and I do appreciate not having to do it when cruising. Also, based on past experience dating back to the glory days of the QE2, the usual demographics of a Cunard cruise tends to make one interact with people I think I would not enjoy talking to (the ‘Keeping Up Appearance’ lady, the Medalled Veteran of the Boer War, the Nostalgic of The Raj, the Cruise Number Record Holder, …). Admittedly, there are many lovely people around too, but since the only way to find out would be to talk to anyone, I’d rather pass on this hit-and-miss way.

As for my wife, her command of English is limited, and she totally hates to be quizzed on her life, where she comes from, where we live, etc. All those things that people ask in small talk but that to her come across as rude and invasive. Interestingly enough, she enjoys interacting with the staff, but not the passengers, probably because crew members are not invasive.

We are just back from two nearly back-to-back cruises on the QV. For the first week, we had a table for 2, although in the Queen’s Grill, the tables for 2 are so close that it felt like being at a table for 6, but no issue. Knowing that we would be back for a second week, the Maitre d’ promised to give us a table for 2 by the window, which he did. However, at the first evening, we found out that at the table next to us there was the most unpleasant and boorish person I ever met. HE was complaining loudly about everything, the service, the food, the prices, etc., while boasting how well travelled he was, including many cruises. His poor wife was hugely embarrassed. I briefly considered telling him to shut up, but in the end, we cut short our dinner and left. On our way out, the Head Waiter apologised, and the next day we were given a new table at the opposite end of the dining room, still a window table but giving to the inside courtyard. The new table was in fact much better, with daylight and a bit of a view, much closer to the entrance and naturally far away from that horrible man. Our neighbours at the next table for 2 were quite okay, which for us means that they kept to themselves as much as we did.

There is another reason why some choose a table for two. Neither of us can sit on dining chairs for long, and only eat one, or at most two courses. So having to dine at the pace of everyone else on a larger table doesn't work for us, as inevitably some munch their way through the entire menu! On a table for two, we can order what we want and leave.

If forced to sit for long, because of surgery that caused damage, my husband loses all feeling from the waist down, and I have different problems if I sit for long too. So a table for two suits us very well. I just pray we are able to get one in a couple of weeks, as we have booked a Saver fare, something we haven't done before in Britannia.

Would anyone ever go into a restaurant on land and request to share a table with strangers ? Or indeed, on entering a restaurant and asking for a table for 2, be offered a table sitting with others ?

No, never. So why should it be different at sea ? But it is and everyone (well, most) accept it. But you would not accept it on land.

We always request a table for 2 (and always got one).

 

We are just back from two nearly back-to-back cruises on the QV. For the first week, we had a table for 2, although in the Queen’s Grill, the tables for 2 are so close that it felt like being at a table for 6.

 

I am not sure if people are being less social. We Have shared tables in the Britannia Rest and on other ships. We have mostly been very lucky. Our experience in grills is different. The first time we shared a table for 6. The first week was great. A real pleasure to get to know an Australian Couple and two wonderful German ladies, the second week was not so good. A well travelled British couple and a German Couple. The main problem was the open dining - we ate at different times and had very different views of the world. So , when we booked again, we asked for a table for two by the window - which we received but as stated, the demand for tables for two is high and now really you are on a table for 6 separated by a couple of gaps. The gap in Q. grill in the QV is narrower than the Q.grill on the QM2. We are travelling with friends on the QV at New Year and will be in the Britannia Restaurant and have requested a table for 4 as we very rarely meet up with them due to living in different parts of the country. My gut feeling, and I could be wrong, is that The Brtannia Rest. Will be more social over New Year than the Grills.

 

I think open dining is making a difference generally. HAL and P & O have split MDRs so you can choose open or fixed dining. Cunard offer it in Grills and Brit plus. I think when on open dining there is a natural tendency to state your preference as you would in any other restaurant.

Do Cunard put single travellers together?

 

Queenie

Yes, I agree that we would never do it on land, but at sea that is one of the attractions for us about crusing..

We are a couple in our 60s who enjoy each other's company very much, but also enjoy interacting with others. We have met some lovely people on our cruises, both on our evening fixed dining table and during the day when we say we are happy to share and are allocated to a table for 6 or 8.

... Do Cunard put single travellers together?

From my experience when travelling as a single (a few years back), yes.

That is not to say that on a large table with several "single" passengers that all seated there will be travelling on their own, but "singles" are grouped together, I've noted.

Best wishes.

DW and I can go for weeks barely getting to talk, we both work in rather time consuming jobs (100 hr weeks are common fir me she wirks full time as well as lecturing part time at uni and doing consulting work for govt departments) our hours can clash, so on a cruise we like nothing more than it to be just the two of us.

No one else wants to talk about the lawn being mowed, DDs latest degree, problems our parents have, but we need to and some topics want to. I really cannot imagine anyone else wanting to listen to us discuss our health issues or any one of a hundred other issues that have simply been left on the shelf due to other priorities.

As someone lse said we are extroverted introverts.

Good to see a variety of opinions, which just goes to show we are all different!

When we cruise as a couple, we like to have breakfast on a table for two...I am not a sociable person in the mornings....:( we don't often bother with proper lunch so that is often in the buffet where we take pot luck and are happy to either dine together or if someone asks to join us we are just as happy. Or we will join another couple if space is scarce.

But in the evenings we enjoy (mainly!) the company of other people and so always request a large table. This has worked well in some cases, and not so well in others - on our TA in 2011 we were on a table of 8 and never once met 4 of those allocated to our table! Whilst the other 2 who did join us were lovely people they were fairly quiet so we didn't quite get the experience we were hoping for. And they didn't turn up on the last night which was disappointing as we never got to say goodbye to them.

On another cruise we had a table of 6 , again lovely people but the other 4 were travelling together so at times we felt a bit left out.

And then the table of 8 which turned out to be the Captains table - without the Captain we had a brilliant time, and with him, even better!

so, we would never ask for a table for two, and are happy to take pot luck with whatever we end up with. Never felt the need to move tables. But each to their own, I respect that.

And the answers in this thread us why they have tables for 2,4,6,8 etc.

It can work very well of course. For example, on our 2nd cruise we were on a table of 4 (asked for 2) and we got on so well that we have since been on another cruise with the said couple, and are in fact are going with them again on our next cruise as well.

I wonder how many people actually do that ?

But, equally, we have been on 2 other cruises and had a table for 2, and that too was fine.

I have friends (who I met on a cruise through dancing) who keep in touch with people they met on the same cruise through having a table together. That's two single women and one couple. They have planned a cruise together in November and have suggested I join them too. They like late seating and I like early, so I would not get the full experience if I go. However, I have cruised with the single women since then on about three occasions. It has worked out well for daily ship life, without the dining experience.

We met a couple on our first cruise on a table for 6 who have become really good friends and have been on another cruise with them already and have two more in the pipeline. We just gelled.:)

We travelled on QM2 for the first time last year and noticed a few people at tables for 2 and commented to ourselves that that seemed to miss out on one of the best bits of cruising - getting to know people you otherwise wouldn't. My partner and I have different interests & approaches to life so after a day spent solely in each others company we are always ready enjoy diverse conversations over dinner!

We'll be setting off on our 3rd "cruise" (2nd TA) next week and are hoping we'll get assigned a friendly table as last time we had to request to be moved only because 2 days worth of breakfast companions & CC M&G friends assured us we shouldn't have to put up with being blanked by our dinner table companions. Fortunately the 2nd table we were given had delightful couples on it albeit older than us & doing the round trip (I get the impression attempts are made to match people by age/journey)

My other half also suffers with back problems if sitting for too long so we do make an effort not to drag breakfasts & lunches out, we often use the buffet for lunch but I have to say, for us, meeting other people is one of the fun bits or maybe we've just been lucky to meet nice or interesting people.

Perhaps because I am perfectly happy on my own with a book or an electronic solitaire game, in fact I need that time & space in order to function well so I ensure I have that in everyday life and while I like being with people I hate making the effort to do so but on a cruise I don't have to do anything I wouldn't be doing anyway. I've worked very hard to have a life I enjoy enough not to need a holiday from and our trip is a means to visit friends I used to live near. My other half as yet hasn't managed to have a life he doesn't need a holiday from so the extended journey gives him time to unwind before we become house guests of my friends thus ensuring everyone wins :-) If I was travelling as a family I'd be more inclined to keep ourselves to ourselves, the dynamics are different in a family holiday but as a couple (or I'm sure as a single) socialising is part of the experience.

Vacations are times for different, sometimes new, experiences; one of which is the assigned table for dinner. That sort of socializing rarely happens in any other environment - and happens to be, for us, one of the distinct pleasures of cruising. Perhaps we have been unusually fortunate with our tablemates, but we have never, in close to two dozen sailings, not had a few really interesting and enjoyable dinner companions - with a number of whom we have maintained contact. It is similar to meeting people at a dinner party - which happens to be so prolonged as to permit moving about the table.

We have looked! Never found a balcony in our inside cabin ; )

 

We have, however, found lovely tablemates, during shipboard time, and enjoyed their company on a nightly basis.

 

On the other hand, DH and I also prefer to have breakfast/lunch in the MDR, seated at a table for two.

 

I agree there are a number of reasons people have different preferences. It seems to make sense for Cunard to offer a number of table-size options.

 

I wonder if the new single cabins on the QM2 will result in a change in the mix. It seems as if larger tables result in more people in less floor space.

 

Does anyone else think there might actually be a reduction in tables-for-two after the refit?

It seems that many folks adopt this approach to the issue of tablemates. We do something just a bit different. We ALWAYS request a table for two for the evening meal. If we want to socialize then we request shared seating at breakfast or lunch. That way we can meet many different fellow travelers and are not "trapped" into dining with THAT person for the entire cruise. When we meet folks we "click" with then we arrange to meet again be it in a lounge or bar or for another meal together. It works well for us.

Harry

That's an interesting idea, Harry...

I think it's asking a lot to expect that every dining companion will gel with us or others.

We must have been unlucky on two cruises recently. First we sat at a 4 table with a couple where the wife had dementia. While we had great sympathy with them our dinners were always the same with endless repetitions of topics brought up every evening. Of course they should have been on a two table and we got the impression that the husband wanted to try to normalise a situation for her.

It was a miserable seven days dining for us. Of course we should have changed tables after the first evening but it took us a couple of dinners to realise there was something amiss. By then it was too late.

On the second cruise, on a six table one couple, with a wife who was obviously dominated by her husband and had nothing to say at all. And the husband whose total conversation was about his time in the Royal Navŷ in the 1950's. Any attempt to steer the talk to other subjects was obviously not welcome. The other couple only lasted one night and we didn't see them again and we dined elsewhere after a couple of nights.

We have had some wonderful interesting people at table over many cruises, but don't assume this will always be the case.

David.