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Night of the Living Drunks: Our 2017 Halloween cruise aboard the Carnival Dream!

watermelonqueen99

By watermelonqueen99,
in Carnival Cruise Lines

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watermelonqueen99

watermelonqueen99

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Looks like my photo hosting issue is all worked out, so lets crack on!

 

Sunday, 10/29/17

Finally, embarkation day had arrived! We quickly got dressed and headed downstairs to grab a quick bite and check-out. The breakfast area was clean and not crowded yet:

 

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If you read my last review, you'll know that I had a very traumatic experience at the hotel we stayed at in Houston before our Freedom cruise in February. It's very painful, and I just finished my last counseling session because of it a month ago. (Even I just rolled my eyes at that.) It involved biscuits and gravy, Adele, and a dramatic fall. That's all I can say without being triggered, but just imagine my joy when I realized they had not only biscuits and gravy, but salsa(ish) as well. The carb gods were shining down on me that day:

 

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After we ate, we hit the road. It was about 7:45, and we had roughly a 3 hour drive to the port. I needed to make one more stop because I realized I forgot my signature perfume. I know you're probably thinking that a sophisticated, discerning lady like myself probably only wears perfume imported from the northern region of France, and you're close. (It's Britney Spear's "Fantasy" and you can get it at any drug store.) We stopped and I got my perfume from a fancy store that has a fancy name I can't pronounce (it was a Wal-Green's) and we hit the road again. Around 9:45, we finally started to see signs for NOLA. About an hour later, we entered the New Orleans city limits. As we expected, traffic was heavy. It seemed everyone but us was trying to get here: ( Americans. We sure love watching men and their balls.)

 

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We finally got to Fulton parking garage around 11:30. This is the latest we have ever arrived at port, and it was making me a little nervous. If I don't get a Guy's burger and a FunShip by 12:30 on embark day, I start rapidly aging, like the vampire in Once Bitten if she doesn't get virgin blood. (If you stop reading this nonsense after that, I won't blame you.) Because I am the walking definition of cheap (take that how you want), I of course chose the cheapest possible parking option at Fulton ($10/day online beforehand, $13 at the port), and we had to drive approximately 7.5 miles to the top of the garage. Along the way, there was construction, panhandlers, hitchhikers, hookers, it was crazy. But it was all worth it when we got to the top and saw this:

 

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It ended up being about noon by the time we got to the top, got our luggage back downstairs, got loaded on the shuttle, and actually made it to the port.

 

When we got off the shuttle we got a closer look at our home for the next week:

 

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All of the lines were fairly long, but everything moved relatively quickly. We were given our cards at check-in, so no having to wait to get it out of our mailbox when our room was ready. Aside from a VERY rude employee, check-in was smooth. We walked right onto the gangway after we got our cards, which was a first for us and was a nice change from sitting and waiting in the terminal.

 

To be continued.......

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NYHartChapp

NYHartChapp

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"When witches go riding, and black cats are seen, the moon laughs and whispers 'tis near Halloween'." -Abraham Lincoln (Or somebody, I'm too lazy to look it up.)

 

Ladies and gentlemen, just as promised, Watermelonqueen99 is back with another review! This time, it's a full picture review of our Western Caribbean cruise aboard the Carnival Dream that left NOLA on 10/29/17. I wrote a review of our cruise on the Freedom earlier this year, and I really enjoyed doing it. I won't link to it, because I'm not into contributing to delinquency (that's a lie, it's actually a hobby of mine), but it's on here if you wanna search for it. (Disclaimer: If you're easily offended, your last name is Duggar, or you're currently on medication, I don't recommend it.) Because Photoshop now wants to charge me to host my pictures, and that money could go toward alcohol, Botox, or scratch-off tickets at the gas station, only the text remains. But it's worth a read if you're planning on sailing on the Freedom, or if you want to lower your IQ by a few points. To begin, I will give you a little overview of who we are, my writing style, and what we do and don't do when we cruise, then I'll get started with the actual review. I have 595 pictures (I don't even have that many pictures of my 2 children combined) that are uploading that I have to sort through, so please be patient with me. I copy/pasted this intro from my Freedom review (because I didn't have to put my drink down to type a new one), and just modified it a little:

 

Hey, girl, hey! We are T (me) and C (him). We met in 1998 in college, and married the next year. We are late 30's, and we own our own business that allows us a lot of flexibility. We first started cruising in April 2014 for our 15th wedding anniversary, got completely hooked, and this cruise on the Dream was #8 for us. We cruise 2-3 times a year. We are currently Gold (actually, it's more of a mustard yellow color ), and looking forward to that Platinum card, mostly so that we can get our draws washed for free and we don't have to keep going to the Deck 2 laundry room like mere pheasants. We'll only be lowly Gold card members for 2 more cruises, thankfully. We are loyal to Carnival, and are very laid-back and easy to please. We have a 15 year old son and an 11 year old daughter, but we do not cruise with them. We do, however, take them to Disney World every summer. (Our bank account just dropped by $6K when I typed that. Reaching for Xanax/Vodka cocktail.) On the ship, we are very social, very friendly, and love to make new friends. During the day, you'll find us around the ship playing cards, people watching, day drinking, wasting money at the casino, or getting wind blown on one the lower, quieter decks. At night, you'll find us at our favorite bar, hanging out with our favorite bartenders and new friends we've met. We don't go to any of the shows, comedy or otherwise. We don't go to dinner in the MDR. (We prefer the classy ambiance of Guy's Burger Joint and/or the Lido buffet.) We do not cruise without the Cheers package, and we make full use of it, no shame. (15 drinks? Honey, that's not a limit, that's a goal.)

 

Also, for this review, I wanted to throw in a little known fact about myself: I'm an athlete. Okay, I'm being a little modest here, I'm actually an Olympic athlete who has won several gold medals. Here is a pic of me and a fellow Olympian after our last competition:

 

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My mama was so proud of me that day. I had been training since I was 16 years old. Anyway, now that my little secret is out, let's talk about my writing. If you're not familiar with my review style, consider yourself lucky. It's not appropriate for women, children, small animals, men of the cloth, virgins, people who wear sweater vests, or really anybody with any decency or intelligence. If you're still here after reading that, shame on you. Also, we should be friends.

 

This was our second time on the Dream and our second time doing this itinerary (sort of, we had to miss Grand Cayman on our first cruise). The pictures will include the ship, food, drinks, what we did in port, screenshots of the FunTimes and more. I took lots of notes, so I may get a little long-winded. (Which is nothing new.) My reviews are far from serious, but I also try to make them informative. My review will be chronological, and will include the good, the bad, and the ugly. Although we do love Carnival, we are also critical when something doesn't live up to the standard we're used to. Like I said, I'm still sorting through the pictures, and I also have a little bit of writer's block (translation: I'm still hungover from the last night of the cruise), so bear with me as I prepare to write this mess for you. I should be here with a full installment tomorrow evening. So feel free to put on that nice track suit you've been saving for your cousin's third wedding, crack open a wine cooler that expired 2 years ago, and join me as I relive our week aboard the Carnival Dream.

 

Just read your first post and I'm hooked.

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pghsteelerfan

pghsteelerfan

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Hey, I can see your pictures!!! I'm "setting sail" but just started, an hour ago, but at this point I'm still able to read (not seeing double yet), that usually takes about 6 drinks. I'M LAUGHING MY ASS OFF, especially that part about checking the bed at the hotel!!! :'):'):') My hubby knows never to book a cruise out of NOLA unless we can have several extra days pre or post cruise...that is a FUN town, love the French Quarter & Bourbon Street. Hope you made it there after the cruise.

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watermelonqueen99

watermelonqueen99

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Hey, I can see your pictures!!! I'm "setting sail" but just started, an hour ago, but at this point I'm still able to read (not seeing double yet), that usually takes about 6 drinks. I'M LAUGHING MY ASS OFF, especially that part about checking the bed at the hotel!!! :'):'):') My hubby knows never to book a cruise out of NOLA unless we can have several extra days pre or post cruise...that is a FUN town, love the French Quarter & Bourbon Street. Hope you made it there after the cruise.

 

It's Friday night, so I'm 2 drinks in myself. :') Glad I could make you laugh! Because of this ridiculous thing called work, we only got a brief time in the French Quarter after we got off the ship. :mad: Next time, we want to stay longer and see what shenanigans we can get ourselves into. :D

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dporter

dporter

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It's Friday night, so I'm 2 drinks in myself. :') Glad I could make you laugh! Because of this ridiculous thing called work, we only got a brief time in the French Quarter after we got off the ship. :mad: Next time, we want to stay longer and see what shenanigans we can get ourselves into. :D

 

I know what you mean, I told my boss that it is so unfair that you actually want me to show up to work to get paid.....

 

If you ever get the chance to spend some time in New Orleans it is really a fun place and so many things to do. The food is absolutely fabulous! We spend 5 days there and it was not nearly enough time.

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watermelonqueen99

watermelonqueen99

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was my first thought.... :eek:

 

I hadn't even noticed it. Lol

 

 

I know what you mean, I told my boss that it is so unfair that you actually want me to show up to work to get paid.....

 

If you ever get the chance to spend some time in New Orleans it is really a fun place and so many things to do. The food is absolutely fabulous! We spend 5 days there and it was not nearly enough time.

 

Since we own our own business, I only have myself or C to complain to, so it's pointless. :') We definitely want to spend some more time in NOLA. :)

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watermelonqueen99

watermelonqueen99

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Sunday, 10/29/17 continued:

So when I left off, we were on the gangway, about to board the ship. I was weak and trembling and deteriorating rapidly from not yet having a burger and a drink, so C had to carry me over his shoulder. He sat me down on a barstool at the atrium bar just a little after 1:00. After a pretty long wait, we got our Cheers sticker and ordered a FunShip. C poured a little bit of it down my throat, and I regained enough strength to go up to Lido and get what I had been dreaming of since our last cruise: a Guy's Burger paired with a FunShip. To quote Jim Gaffigan, it was like a match made in obesity:

 

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I want to point out that that is C's plate with 2 burgers on it. I can throw down some meat (that sounds dirty, I like it), but I can't eat 2 burgers at once. Also, I don't know why his umbrella and fruit is missing from his drink. I guess he ate all that too. That toothpick must have been a bitch going down, yikes. Anyway, I wanna also throw in that we very rarely dine out at home because cooking is a hobby of ours. And also, we find the food on Carnival to be mostly inedible. At home, I eat high protein/low carb, and I'm also a certified Zumba instructor who is in the gym 5-7 days a week and on top of that, I'm a former nurse. But when it comes to a Guy's burger, I turn into a 400 pound man who has high cholesterol, diabeetus, (or The Sugars as my late granny called it), and arteries that are 97% blocked. I ate one of these every damn day of the cruise except one, people. Here's a closer look at this heart attack on a plate:

 

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After we finished eating, it was well after 1:30, so we decided to check and see if our room was ready. Of course we grabbed another drink before heading down there, so for these next pics, let's play the adult version of "Where's Waldo." I call it "Where's the FunShip." Side note: our favorite deck on a Carnival ship is deck 2. I am highly susceptible to motion sickness, so staying on a lower deck is a must for me. We have gotten an upgrade call on every single cruise since our second, and last year on the Dream we took an upgrade from a deck 2 interior to a balcony on deck 9. Never. Again. We had storms/rough seas a couple of days, and I was sicker than someone who had accidentally drank after Charlie Sheen. We love the darkness of an interior room, but if we're on a Dream class ship and get a good offer to upgrade to a cove balcony (our favorite kind of cabin), we'll take it. We got the upgrade call a few days before we sailed on this cruise offering us a cove for $300. That was a little too much for us, and it was also under the galley. We had made that mistake before, and I'd rather have drinks with Bill Cosby than do that again. When we stayed under the galley on the Magic, it sounded like they were throwing pots and pans on the floor as hard as they could all night long. Anyway, to make a long story short our room, 2422, interior category 4B, was ready. We dropped off our backpack and I took a few pics of the room. I'm just gonna be blunt here. I wish Carnival would offer some true King beds, not just those tiny-ass beds pushed together. When you're trying to have sexy time, and you're positioned in a certain way and your knee is sinking down into the crack between the beds so bad that you get muscle cramps and you are hollering so loud your room steward comes to check on you, it really kills the mood. But here's the "King" bed:

 

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This is the first place you stumble to when you make it back to your room after reaching your daily goal of 15 drinks:

 

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This is where your mini fridge and safe are, and also ample closet space:

 

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I can confirm that both sides of this sign now say "Snoozin," so you never have to worry about your room steward walking in on you doing naked Pilates again. (That's what I heard from a friend, anyway.):

 

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To be continued....

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Cookie2boys

Cookie2boys

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Loving this review!!! I just read the Freedom review. You have a great writing style. I have one question for you.... How in the H E double hockey sticks did you come up with the name "watermelonqueen99". Seems to me it would have been more appropriate to use "alcoholqueen99".... or was that one already taken:p:p:p

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watermelonqueen99

watermelonqueen99

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Sunday, October 29th, 2017 continued:

When I left off, I had given you a riveting (not at all) tour of our room. Now that we had dropped our backpack off and took a couple pics of the room, we braced ourselves for what was looming. It's the worst part of cruising. It evokes emotions and nightmares worse than anything we experienced on 11/08/16: Muster Drill. C and I brainstormed on ways we could get out of it. He would use our cabin phone to call in a bomb threat to the bridge. I would fake a serious illness and need the Coast Guard to airlift me off the ship. We would try to hide under the chairs in the main show lounge. We finally came to the conclusion that there was no avoiding it, so we went to the bar for one more drink before subjecting ourselves to such brutality:

 

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The one good thing I can say about this Muster is that since we were on a Dream class ship, it was held inside. We've been on the Freedom twice and the Splendor once, every other ship has been a Dream class. On both of those smaller class ships, Muster is held outside and it's torture. I would rather share a needle with Pamela Anderson than to attend an outdoor Muster. Our Muster station this time was E3, which was the Scarlet dining room. Everyone at our table was either asleep or playing on their phone/Kindle. In the event of an emergency, I highly doubt any of these people would have been able to remember where they were supposed to be. Oh well, more room on the lifeboat for us.

 

After Muster, we headed to Lido to catch a little bit of the sail-away party. It was kind of dead, so we ended up on deck 11, just to enjoy the view. Seeing this is sure to get you in the mood for fun:

 

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Sail-away actually ended up being delayed. So we decided to go around and snap a few pics from the ship. Pretty bridge:

 

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Check out the tail on this girl:

 

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Waterworks area:

 

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We ended up not sailing away until 5:45 or so. Eventually, we ended up going back to our room to see if our bags had arrived. They had, which was much earlier than usual, so we went ahead and unpacked.

 

To be continued.....

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