What's the Funnies Complaint You Ever Heard at Guest Relations?

These two complaints were overheard at the Shore Excursion desk during the Millennium's inaugural sailing in 2000. First, after the first day of a 2-day visit to St. Petersburg, a gentleman was heard demanding that Celebrity require Russia to include English on all street signs and buildings so that Americans could tell where they were. Second, after our stop in Tallinn, Estonia (a beautiful, well preserved walled city dating from Medieval times) that her excursion cost be refunded because the streets were cobblestone, not paved, making it uncomfortable for her to walk in her high heels. This woman had been on my tour and had no problem being at the front of the group at each stop, apparently despite her sore feet.

Now I may be mistaken here, but we went on a tour of the cabins on change over day on Century when we were on a B2B. The Captains Club Hostess offered to show us the Royal and Penthouse suites. I am pretty sure that the PH one had two bedrooms and two bathrooms. Each bedroom was off the main living room/Dining room. It did not seem to be adjoining cabins. There was only one entrance to the suite that I saw.

Sorry, but there is only one bedroom for the Century Penthouse. This is also true for the Penthouses on other Celebrity ships. As far as I know the only two bedroom suite on Celebrity is the Reflection Suite which is only on the Celebrity Reflection.

Here is the floor plan of the Century's Penthouse:

Sorry, but there is only one bedroom for the Century Penthouse. This is also true for the Penthouses on other Celebrity ships. As far as I know the only two bedroom suite on Celebrity is the Reflection Suite which is only on the Celebrity Reflection.

Here is the floor plan of the Century's Penthouse:

 

where's the piano?

Though it wasn't a complaint at guest relations, it was a complaint made to a waiter in the dining room. And though the subject of it was funny, the delivery was disrespectful.

At lunch two ladies ordered a sushi appetizer. Of course there was a description of the appetizer in the menu. They were stunned when the sushi arrived, and demanded that it go back to the kitchen as it had not been cooked. They were rude and disrespectful, awful behaviour.

Another dining room, which was truly funny, was a lady at a nearby table ordered gazpacho (a chilled tomato soup) for her appetizer. Her drawl as she said to the waiter "Donovan, my soup is cold!" We laughed about it all week. I still laugh about it. The difference this time was that the guest wasn't rude and laughed when she realized she had made a mistake.

where's the piano?

On the M and S class ships.

i was lining up to get a coffee one day at the Cova Cafe on Century when the woman in front of me started complaing that she did not want UHT milk but MUST have fresh milk.

The poor attendant was taken for words so I piped up with "Yes why dont you go up to the Pool deck and see if the cows are ready to be milked today!"....Needless to say she gave me a foul look and the attendant had to turn away he was laughing so much. P.S I drink black coffee.

On another thread, I've read about passengers complaining about the lack of fresh meat, they object to the ship using frozen!

Do they really think before they speak???:eek:

We saw two ladies ask customer service ---

"Which elevator do we get on to go to the front of the boat?"

On another thread, I've read about passengers complaining about the lack of fresh meat, they object to the ship using frozen!

Do they really think before they speak???:eek:

Well, why did they put that meadow on the S-class if they aren't keeping the cows on it? :D

Well, why did they put that meadow on the S-class if they aren't keeping the cows on it? :D

Well, they do have a pig sty & trough for the pigs!

Oh wait, that's just some of the guests at the buffet. My mistake.

:p

I remember hearing one woman complaining at GR that her cabin attendant was too friendly. She went on and on about him coming to open her door for her and asking how she was "everyday". Finally she got to her point that he was too friendly because he wanted a bigger tip! The nerve of him.

Those of us standing in line, listening, just shook our heads and smiled at each other, feeling sorry for the attendant.

I was sitting playing bingo with my wife and daughter and the person sitting next to us was complaining non-stop that people who do not know bingo etiquette should not should be playing. She was getting visibly upset as people asked numerous questions about how to play and which card to use. Her continual badmouthing started to grate on the nerves of everyone sitting nearby. When we got to the cover all card, she stood up after about 9 numbers were called. She got roundly booed and those in immediate proximity were all laughing so hard because of her earlier tirade.

I think I've encountered the bingo police just about every time I've played! They also don't like it if someone new takes "their" seat. Never seen anyone complaining about it at GR, though!

Although, once when I was in line at GR to cash out my winnings, there was a woman in line who saw what we were doing and she loudly announced that we weren't really winning, that it was a "fix" put in by the cruise line that we had agreed to participate in to make it look as though there were winners but the ship would actually be keeping all of the money.

I took great pleasure in waving my $250 in her direction when I left the desk!

On an Alaskan cruise years ago, a pax was complaining to a bartender that the Alaskan cruises were "grossly overrated". His primary evidence for that comment was that there was not enough wildlife and that he should have just gone to SeaWorld instead.

A couple complained loudly and bitterly that they had paid for an Ocean View Balcony but received a Port View Balcony instead and demanded to switch cabins...the Hotel Director told them he would take care of everything after the ship got underway. :rolleyes:

This one made me absolutely speechless........ Still shaking my head AND STILL SPEECHLESS.

This one made me absolutely speechless........ Still shaking my head AND STILL SPEECHLESS.

It is one of those oldies that cruise directors like to tell over and over and have been repeating on cruise ships, in one version or another, for at least the past 10 years. :D

Just wait until you hear it a few more times, or various versions of the same joke (a view of the parking lot, a view of a warehouse, etc.) and you will be rolling your eyes instead. ;)

 

It is one of those oldies that cruise directors like to tell over and over and have been repeating on cruise ships, in one version or another, for at least the past 10 years. :D

 

Closer to 20 I'd reckon.;)

I loved reading all the posts. I think I'll have to hang out by the customer service desk on my next cruise - just for the entertainment.:D

Sorry about the Century Penthouse post. I missed the part about it being on Millenium :eek:

One other that I remembered, was a guy who went down to complain because he thought the person (people) in one of the adjoining cabins were complaining to guest relations about him smoking on his balcony.

Guest relations asked him, "so you don't smoke?" he said "yeah I do", guest relations said "So you don't smoke on your balcony then?" and he said "well not as often as the people next door said I do", he said they were just trouble makers

While this is not cruise related, this is the dumbest compliant I have ever heard. When 9/11 happened, my wife and I were spending the week at Disney World. It was a very melancholy experience and we were scheduled to go back to Washington, DC on the day flights were ready to resume. We had flown down on United and after talking the airlines we were scheduled to fly back on US Air, through Charlotte. Understandably, the airport was very somber and extremely quiet. Security was on high alert. The flight was delayed twice.

Well two passengers were extremely upset that they had not boarded and could not understand why there had been all these delays. They said this was unacceptable and they demanded that they be upgraded to first class and started to throw a hissy-fit. Everyone was incredulous and you could tell the US Air staff were extremely annoyed. The airline finally announced the flight would be ready to board in about an hour and everyone could get their seat assignments. There must have been 20 people on the flight. We had nice seats upfront with plenty of leg room. The couple that were complaining had seats all the way in the back and were next to the bathroom. They tried to change seats but were told that if they got up again they would be removed from the plane. It was the first smile that my wife and I had in 3 days.

OK, we are going to get off subject here, but I also have an airline story. :D

Very recently, we were boarding an Allegiant flight that was to last approx. 1.5 hours. There was a couple and their service dog (large Golden Retriever type) that had not been assigned a seat. Their assignment was made, and they boarded along with us...nice couple! They received the bulkhead seats and comfortably settled in for the short flight. The dog seemed very happy to have some room to move around in. :)

We were assigned seats a few rows behind the Golden Retriever couple. As the plane started to fill up, a woman boarded and then proceeded to tell the couple that the seats they were in belonged to she and her husband (whom had yet to board.) They were also assigned the same seats. She pitched such a fit! Her husband, who by that time had boarded, was embarrassed. Had it been my seat, I would have seen the need of the couple and their dog and let it go. Instead, this lady insisted the couple go back out and get reassigned seats so that she and her husband could have the bulkhead for the 1.5 hour flight.:rolleyes: The misplaced couple was so gracious about the whole thing. They ended up moving back to the back of the plane. The whole episode made me so made! :mad:

Have you ever seen a large service dog on a plane? They are crammed up under the seat in front of their owners. We once flew where two blind people and BOTH their German Shepherd service dogs were sitting under our seats. We never knew it until the flight landed. Never heard or felt those dogs. I felt so bad for them.:(

OK, we are going to get off subject here, but I also have an airline story. :D

 

Very recently, we were boarding an Allegiant flight that was to last approx. 1.5 hours. There was a couple and their service dog (large Golden Retriever type) that had not been assigned a seat. Their assignment was made, and they boarded along with us...nice couple! They received the bulkhead seats and comfortably settled in for the short flight. The dog seemed very happy to have some room to move around in. :)

 

We were assigned seats a few rows behind the Golden Retriever couple. As the plane started to fill up, a woman boarded and then proceeded to tell the couple that the seats they were in belonged to she and her husband (whom had yet to board.) They were also assigned the same seats. She pitched such a fit! Her husband, who by that time had boarded, was embarrassed. Had it been my seat, I would have seen the need of the couple and their dog and let it go. Instead, this lady insisted the couple go back out and get reassigned seats so that she and her husband could have the bulkhead for the 1.5 hour flight.:rolleyes: The misplaced couple was so gracious about the whole thing. They ended up moving back to the back of the plane. The whole episode made me so made! :mad:

 

Have you ever seen a large service dog on a plane? They are crammed up under the seat in front of their owners. We once flew where two blind people and BOTH their German Shepherd service dogs were sitting under our seats. We never knew it until the flight landed. Never heard or felt those dogs. I felt so bad for them.:(

:eek: Yikes !

Some people...

Thing is i truly believe that life eventually catches up with such people... Including this woman.

Karma, well she doesn't forget, and can be quite The B!tch when the time comes to prove a point / even the score

Cheers!

:eek: Yikes !

 

Some people...

 

Thing is i truly believe that life eventually catches up with such people... Including this woman.

 

Karma, well she doesn't forget, and can be quite The B!tch when the time comes to prove a point / even the score

 

Cheers!

Oh, I didn't finish the story.:rolleyes: She got what she asked for...the nice comfy, roomy seats... AND... a screaming baby across the isle, for almost the entire 1.5 hours home! :D

The best one I have heard personally was a lady demanding a refund for her entire cruise because she got a carton of milk on the buffet that the Best By date was the day previous. The agent asked if she got sick. She said no, but could have. Then he asked the most obvious question, "Why didn't you just grab another one?" I busted out laughing and walked away at that point.

Bret

My favorite is the 2 ladies on the elevator complaining that they would never sail on Celebrity again because all in did on their cruises was rain. We had a hurricane chasing us.