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Our Journey on the Journey to West Africa - Anyway we Wanted it, But didn't Stop Believing

SailorJack

By SailorJack,
in Azamara

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SailorJack

SailorJack

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We have been waiting two years for this trip and while we had originally intended to bring our daughter Alexis with us (we named her that because we could have been driving one if we had not had her), but her classes started up again. Though this had originally been planned as a family trip before the pandemic, we are still happy to be sailing again.

 

Pre-Cruise Day 1 - Cape Town

 

For our first day in Cape Town I have envisioned a relaxing day exploring the city or perhaps visiting the beach. However, Sailor Jill has suggested that she select the day’s itinerary. I readily agreed, but something in Jill’s eyes hinted that there was more to her request than she let on. (In literary circles this is known as foreshadowing.)

 

SailorJill: “ Wouldn’t it be great to accept the Three Mountain Challenge!”

SailorJack: What! I had no idea what that was, but the words ‘three’ and ‘mountain’ had my immediate attention.”

SailorJill: “Jack, it is a exciting walking/running hike that goes to Devil’s Peak, Table Mountain Peak, and Lion’s Head. It is challenging but it can be done in ten hours. We can use your backpack to take food and water. And won’t it make for a terrific memory that we can share with our friends once we are back home?”

SailorJack: “A ten hour hike over three mountains?  (This is what I get for not insisting on a prenup!) NO!”

SailorJill: “Very well - if you insist. Then lets take the Table Mountain Aerial Cableway to Table Mountain. From there we can take the Agama Hike - an easy 1 hour hike around Table Mountain.”

SailorJack: “Well played Jill.”

 

Well, as it turns out, as those of you in the front row have already figured out, Jill had no intention of going on a three peaks ten hour mountain hike, she was just setting me up to pay for a cable car ride and take  a one hour hike on top of a mountain!

 

Not surprisingly, the ride was exciting and Table Mountain, it turns out, was well worth the visit.  It has been named one of the New 7 Wonders of Nature and is one of the oldest mountains in the world - ringing in at 360 million years of age. (The Alps are a mere 40 million years old.)

 

The hike actually turned out to be well worth the effort - the views, as I mentioned, were fantastic and it is reported that we were walking amongst  8,000 species of plants - making it one of the richest floristic regions in the wold!

 

It is also home to the Rock Hyrax - an animal that basically resembles a guinea pig on steroids. I mention this because the Rock Hyrax produces hyraceum -

 

 ( I will pause here momentarily as our more cultured readers may wish to skip the next paragraph)

 

- which is a sticky mass of dung and urine which is used - and I swear I am not making this up -  to make perfume! Which you can actually buy on Etsy! To make the perfume you must use hyraceum and alcohol - the instructions here were a little garbled so I am not sure whether you are supposed to drink the alcohol before making the perfume or you mix the alcohol with the hyraceum to make the perfume.  Quite obviously, my preference would be for the former!

 

Which leads to the question - who first thought up this idea?

 

Mable: “ Ewww, what is that smell?”

Minnie: “ I think you stepped in something from those little pigs.”

Mable: “Hmm, you think if we put a little of that behind our ears we would be more attractive to men?”

Minnie: “ Great idea. The a, ah, raw material is free.  We could bottle it and make a fortune!”

 

Pre-Cruise Day 2 - Cape Town

 

Today we have signed up for a trip down the western coast of South Africa to visit  the Cape of Good Hope. At the start of our trip our guide gave us a safety lecture that included the following:

 

“It is possible that once we enter the Cape of Good Hope Nature Reserve you may be attacked by wild baboons! They will grab any bag or purse you may have looking for food. If there is no food they will drop the bag and leave. If you try to resist they will hurt you, grab the bag and flee and you will never see your bag again.

 

OK. Note to self - do not bring any food!”

 

Once so briefed we headed south, stopping  at several scenic spots - including a large outdoor food market selling all manner of African vegetables and fruits - including mangoes for two Rand and ( I swear I am not making this up) “used mangoes” for a single Rand. Don’t Ask!

 

The drive south was magnificent. The coastline was stunning, the small towns and villages were unique in their styles, and the resorts quite luxurious. One could easily see why this part of South Africa was a draw to visitors and tourists alike.

 

Upon entering the Cape of Good Hope Nature Reserve the landscape gradually changed from wooded hills to a flatter land and more diverse, lower growing flora. It was also not unusual to see ostriches walking among the bushes or wading in the water at the edge of the sea.

 

Readers with an interest in history may already know that he first European to reach The Cape was the Portuguese explorer Bartolomeu Dias who named it Cape of Storms. The storms - caused by the meeting of currents (one cold and one warm) from the Indian and Atlantic Oceans - made the trip around the Cape extremely dangerous and deterred many seamen and merchants from attempting the passage.

 

Now this posed a problem to King John of Portugal who wanted to increase the spice trade to India and was tired of his pantywaist sea captains refusing the go because of a few storms and ship wrecks.

 

So John convened a grand council of his best scientists and geographers and after lengthy research and discussion they discovered that the Cape of Storms was actually the Cape of Good Hope!

 

King John then announced the discovery to navel authorities and ships began flocking to India now that they no loner had to face the Cape of Storms!

 

And to this day the Marketing Council of Madison Avenue continues to display a photo of King John as an inspiration to all.

 

Day One - Cape Town

 

This will be our first cruise on Azamara and we are greeted with a glass of champagne and a broadcast from the Captain welcoming us aboard for what he described as 21 days of exploration and discovery. He also included our second safety briefing including an admonition against eating any raw or under cooked meat or fish. Good advice indeed, but I couldn’t help but notice that ceviche was on the menu for tonight's dinner!

 

After finishing our champagne we headed upstairs to see our cabin, It turned out to be small - perhaps the smallest we have ever had - but workable. Workable, that is, until we opened the door to our bathroom. There was no shower! We called our cabin attendant and with his help we found it. I had been there all the time - hiding behind a plastic curtain in the corner.

 

But to be fair, it was easy to miss - the usable floor space of the shower was approximately 48 square inches - slightly larger than the place mat on your dinning room table. It proved to be impossible to bend over to wash the lower portions of ones body  - leaving the only option to step out of the shower to soap up and to then step back into the shower to rinse. In the end end we wound up just soaping up the walls of the shower and then spinning around. Of course, either option including contending with the plastic curtain which had a habit, in that enclosed space, of shrink wrapping you up much like a pound of beef at the deli counter of your local supermarket. Maybe we could shower up a the Spa?

 

At dinner tonight I was quite thirsty and declined a glass of wine and asked for a Diet Coke. Our waiter brought out a can of Coke Light. Apparently “Light” is South African for “Diet.” Anyway, at dinner on our second night, as I was about to order a glass of wine, our waiter (who had an excellent memory) presented we with a glass of ice and a Coke Light. Not wishing to be seen as ungrateful, I thanked him and drank Coke Light that night again - all the while casting envious glances at Jill’s goblet of chilled prosecco. And so it came to be that I became a dinner-time teetotaler for 21 days.

 

DAY 3 - Walvis Bay, Namibia

 

We have arrived at our first port - Walvis Bay, Namibia, located on the southwest coast of Africa. A town with a checkered past, it has changed its name more often than Elizabeth Taylor.  Referred to by the British as Whale Bay, the Dutch renamed it Walvisch (from Old Dutch ‘Wal’ for whale and ‘fisk’ for fish) Baye  - then changed their mind and renamed it Walvish Bay. Then during what has been referred to as “The Awkward Years”  it gravitated between Walwich Bay and Walwisch Bay! Finally, apparently as the result of  massive disagreement in the 1949 National Spelling Bee competition, all parties agreed to its current spelling. Now this should not be confused with the actual name -  Ezorongondo - as it was called by the Herero people who  originally (and still do) inhabited the area.

 

After trying to explain all this to SailorJill, I was rewarded with an  eye-roll and a look she usually saves for the socially challenged. To recapture the initiative, I reach in to my jacket pocket and surprised her with two special tickets!

 

SailorJill: “Jack, what are these tickets for?”

SailorJack: “ I have signed us up for a ride around the harbor to see the Walvisis - or maybe its Walvi.  We have never seen them before and how can we say we have been to Walvis Bay and not seen a Walvis?”

SailorJill: “ Jack, you are thinking of a Walrus and there are none here - the water is too warm! This is Walvis Bay not Walrus Bay!”

 

Well, apparently I have misunderstood the whole history of naming this place if there are no Walvi! But in my defense, the Old Dutch name for this place was Whale Fish!  Anyway, our tour included a 4x4 vehicle ride to Pelican point and then a kayak tour of Walvis Bay Lagoon. Our guide told us the lagoon was home to a lot of bird species as well as 50,000 Cape Fur Seals!

 

The tour was actually very enjoyable and I am pleased to report that we did not tip over - not even once. One of the highlights of our rather scenic cruise was a visit from one of the Cape Fur Seals that actually came within touching distance of our kayak. However, this blissful moment was somewhat tainted when Jill called out, “oh, look Jack, a Walvis!”

 

(Never marry a woman with a worst sense of humor than your own!)

 

DAY 7 - Luanda, Angola

 

We have arrived in Luanda, Angola and it not without a little trepidation that we go ashore. It is reported that crime is on the rise here - especially in areas frequented by tourists. One must be a little concerned when even the tourist advisories state: Do Not Walk Around at Night! We receive our third safety notice: take no jewelry ashore, no watches, no bulky watches.  If you have a gold tooth, don’t smile!

 

In anticipation of our visit here I had purchased a Luanda Visitor kit, so preparing to go ashore we check the kit to make sure we have everything:

 

Sunglasses - check

Sun screen - check

Pepper Spay - check

Air Horn - check

First Aid Kit - check

 

Satisfied that we are prepared for our shore excursion we depart the ship.

 

We have decided not to take a tour to see the countryside as a posting on Trip Advisor  advises that roads outside of Luanda contain pot holes and land mines. (I couldn’t help but wonder how many of the pot holes were caused by exploding land mines (vestiges of  the civil war which ended in 2002). And apparently roads are not all that safe within Luanda itself.  A recent post from a visitor stated that when taking a tour of Luanda they travelled in a convoy of minivans, a motorcycle policeman, two police cars and an ambulance with medical staff.

 

Also, it has been a long time since we have been in a city where there were uniformed men with submachine guns on every block - sometimes more than one!

 

In contravention to the dangers inherent in visiting Luanda, Angola is actually one of the most affluent countries in Africa. This point was driven home to us as we walked along the city’s main streets.  We were approached by the young boy who asked for money. I gave him a dollar. He looked at it and asked if I had anything bigger. When I told him it was all I had he gave the dollar bill back to me saying I probably needed it more than he did. Word must have spread as we were never approached by another alms seeker during our entire visit!

 

Day 8 - Somewhere off the Coast of Africa

 

As I went up to Deck 10 today for my early morning run, I noticed several security personnel on both sides of the ship - armed with high powered binoculars. I went up to one of the security guys:

 

SailorJack: “ Good Morning, what are you looking for?”

Security Guy: “Aah, whales. We are watching for whales.”

SailorJack: “Whale season is long over  - there are no whales this time of Year.”

Security Guy: “ I meant we are watching for other ships so we don’t have a collision.”

SailorJack: “The ship has radar for that. What are you really doing?”

Security Guy: “OK, but you didn’t hear it from me. We are on Pirate Watch. But nothing to worry about as there has not been any pirate activity here recently.”

SailorJack: “What do you mean recently! Since last Tuesday or last year!?”

 

As it turns out they really were on pirate watch duty! Upon hearing this I immediately told him that I was ready to help - having been trained in hand fighting and musketry when I was in the army. His response was: “Which army - the North or the South.” At least he had the good grace not to include the Continental as one of the options!

 

Pirate watch continued for the next two weeks, but we never saw a single one. And, as much as we wanted to, we couldn’t even talk like a pirate as National Talk Like a Pirate Day isn’t until September.

 

DAY 11 - Sedondi-Tskosfi, Ghana

 

Our tour of Ghana started off with a visit to the twin cities of Sedondi and Tskosfi. As we walked through the streets we came across  a spa that was advertising Chocolate massages.  Now this is not the first time I had been exposed to such an establishment, but it is the first time we actually had time to experience it. Apparently seeing us through the window, a lady in an impressive white uniform came out and explained about their massages and invited us in. Before I could agree, SailorJill politely declined.

 

 I tried to entice Jill into joining me for the Deluxe Couples Chocolate Massage but she was adamant in her denial. “But not only does it feel good.” I argued, “but the lady wearing the official uniform says it is also healthy as it puts in dolphins into the body.”

 

“Jack, I heard what she said, but it is endorphins that are released  - not dolphins. I am sure that the massage is not a tribute to Free Willie. And while it sounds nice, I would prefer to imbibe my chocolate - not have it poured over by back - as nice as that might sound.”

 

“But the chocolate will be the freshest we have ever had! Ghana is the world’s leading producer of chocolate - producing over 2 million tons of it a year! We need to celebrate chocolate and support the local economy while we are here.

 

“OK, you can buy a candy bar.”

 

On a more sober note, our visit to the Cape Coast Slave Castle was an important stop on our tour.  It was here that slaves were kept before being loaded onto ships heading for North and South America and the Caribbean islands. I will not try to describe the deplorable conditions facing those imprisoned here. However, you may recall the poignant photo of the Obamas gazing out to sea as they stood at the Door of  No Return. It was through this door that chained slaves had there last glimpse of their native land.

 

Day 12 - Abidjan,  Côte d’Ivori

 

Has there every been a more alluring name for a port -  Côte d’Ivori. It evokes visions of the French Rivera - the sun dancing off the Mediterranean waters, the warm sandy beaches, and the quaint French villas? And, in fact, Abidjan, the Capitol of the Ivory Coast, is the second largest French speaking city in the world.

 

I’m guessing it could only happen in Africa - as we were apparently hitting the perfect trifecta. As reported by the ship’s newsletter, we were due to arrive at 7:00 AM, we could leave the ship at 7:00 AM, and the first shuttle to downtown would leave at (you guessed it) 7:00 AM. It came as no surprise to anyone aboard that none of those events occurred at 7:00 AM.

 

But once ashore, and as we strolled through town, we came to a bridge which spanned the Asagny Canal,  which connected Abidjan to the Bandanna River - the longest and most important river in the Ivory Coast. As I explained to SailorJill, the American name for the river, in a basically French speaking nation, was probably in honor of an American Western movie star - maybe Gregory Peck - who visited the Ivory Coast and took a cruise on the river  causing a sensation while wearing  traditional cowboy bandannas. Which would also explain the naming of two of its tributaries as the White Bandanna and the Red Bandanna.

 

“Jack, the name of the river is not Bandanna, but, the Bandama River and there is no record of Gregory Peck ever  having visited the Ivory Coast.

 

“Oh.”

 

 

 

 

DAY 15 - Banjul, Gambia

 

We have arrived in Gambia - the smallest country in mainland Africa, and dropped anchor at the Gambian capitol of Banjul. With a population less than the number of people sitting on the left side of the stadium for this years Superbowl, the city actually sits on an island. Maybe “sits” is the wrong word - lets just say it is situated on an island.

 

Because of its small size we are not taking an organized tour in Banjul and I caution Jill to dress conservatively so that we can more easily blend in with the local population. That done, we gather our bags and head for the gangway.

 

Once ashore we are approached by a man who appears to be in his twenties - or maybe forties ( I'm terrible with ages so let's average it out and and say he is in his thirties.)

 

30's Guy: "Hello, you must be off the ship in the harbor."

SailorJack: "Yes, but how could you tell?"

30's Guy: "You're carrying a tote bag that says 'Azamara', and most people who live here don't wear a T-shirt that says 'Kiss me - I'm Irish’."  

SailorJill: "Nice blending in, Jack."

30's Guy: "Listen, you look like honest people, and we really  need your help. My family was high up in the government before the revolution and now we need to get out of the  country because...."

SailorJack: " Wait a minute, in researching this port I didn't read anything about a revolution."

30's Guy: "It was a quiet revolution and didn't make the papers and probably occurred when CNN was focused on reporting on what Shania Twain was wearing at your Country Music Awards. Anyway, my family  will be searched when we try to leave, and you could help us by taking this bag of Kolmanskop diamonds with you  - it's all we have left from our family fortune.  For your efforts you may keep half the diamonds. All I need from you is your address, so we can get back our half of the diamonds - and $500 so we can get visas and passports. Your half of the diamonds will make you a very rich man - even in America.

SailorJack: "How do you know we are from America?"

30's Guy: Your baseball cap says, 'Born in the USA'"

SailorJill: "Nice blending in Jack."

SailorJack: "Look, I would like to help out but I don't have $500."

30's Guy: "That's OK, just give me your credit card number and your mother’s maiden name and we can charge it."

 

Well, to make a long story short, Jill wouldn't  - despite my protestations - give me the credit card as she argued that it was a scam. I pointed out that this was not Nigeria but she was unrelenting and I wound up not getting my bag of diamonds.

 

Gambia was also involved in what could only be described as somewhat of a cross between “Peggy Sue Got Married” and “Kramer vs Kramer.” In 1982, Gambia married its really, really big neighbor to the North, South, and East  -Senegal - forming what came to be known as the Senegambia Confederation. Now the fact that Senegal got top billing in the name should have been an early warning sign on how the relationship would be developing. However, apparently, after waking up  and reading the prenup, Gambia discovered that not only was the president of Senegambia to always be a Senegalese, but, by law, two thirds of the legislature was also to be Senegalese! And the Confederal Army was to be two thirds Senegalese and one third Gambian. And…oh well, you get the idea.

 

Although beset with unexpected difficulties, the union lasted longer than seven of Elizabeth Taylor’s marriages and experienced numerous problems in merging the two families. So, after years of couples counseling went to no avail, Gambia, with a broken heart, dissolved the marriage in 1987.

 

Today, Gambia and Senegal remain good friends and still occasionally see each other.

 

DAY 18 - Las Palmas, Gran Canaria

 

We have arrived at Las Palmas the Co-capitol of the Canary Islands which is situated on Gran Canaria  - the third largest of the seven major islands making up the Canary Islands. Now, the first question to ask oneself upon arriving is: Were there canaries on the Canary Islands? The answer is complicated, but in essence the answer is “no”  - there were no “canaries” on the island when the Spanish began their conquest of the lands in the 15th Century.

 

However, there were lots of wild dogs! In Latin the word “Canin” translates as “dog.” Hence the islands were named the Canary Islands because of the wild dogs. It was only after the Islands became famous for their beautiful native birds that the birds became known as canaries. So the canary birds were actually named after the Islands and not the other way around - with the Atlantic Canary becoming the official national symbol of Gran Canaria (or maybe not -more on this later).  See - I told you it was complicated.

 

During our tour our guide talked about the culture of the islands and the national sport of Lucha Canaria - or Canary Wrestling. No, lets be real here, birds are not involved.

 

In this team sport, opponents stand in a circle of sand and the object is to make the other person touch the sand with any body part other that the feet. There are relatively few rules, but, apparently, strangling your opponent is specifically NOT permitted.  However you are  permitted to grasp any other body  part (well not EVERY body part) of your opponents in an effort to un-balance him or force him to touch the sand with other than his feet.

 

So ingrained in the islands folklore is Lucha Canaria that inter-island matches are carried by Canarian television. Suggestions on the part of our guide to be part of a demonstration were politely refused!

 

DAY 19 - Santa Cruz De Tenerife

 

Today we are visiting the other Co-capitol of the Canary Islands - Santa Cruise de Tenerife - located on the second largest of the islands -

Tenerife.

 

Today, the tour for which we signed up is taking us to Palmetum, which, apparently is Latin for Garbage Dump.  Wait! I didn’t finish reading the tour itinerary. The Palmetum is actually a botanical garden hosting what is considered to be the largest collection of island palm trees in the world. It sits on what used to be a 12 hectare garbage dump! I have no idea what a hectare is, but it may be Spanish for “large piece of land”.

 

As might be expected, bird spotting is an active sport on the Canary Islands and the Palmetum was no exception. Our guide pointed out several beautiful ones including the Blue Chaffinch (the national bird of  Tenerife), the Laurel Pigeon (the national symbol of the island of La Gomera), and one of the rarest birds on the island  - the Tenerife Blue Tit. While I am not positive about this, I suspect that the ornithologist who discovered and named the Tenerife Blue Tit may also be the one who discovered and named the Blue Footed Boobie in the Galapagos.

 

As one might surmise from the above, The Canary Islands have more National Birds per square acre than anywhere else in the world.

 

DAY 20 - Funchal, Madeira

 

Today we are visiting our last port on what has truly been a voyage of exploration and discovery and  have signed up for a free walking tour of the city. On the tour we learned about the history of Funchal and visited many of the city’s historical and cultural sites. Our local guide pointed out some of her favorite eateries, pastry shops (ummmm), and wine shops. Certainly one the highlights was a visit to a tasting room for Funchal’s prize product - Madeira wine - where we learned the history of this world renowned libation.

 

After the tour we revisited a shop that specialized in local biscuits and cookies to buy some small gifts for friends at home. I am proud to say that they all made it safely home! After our other souvenir shopping we found a small cafe with outdoor seating to try Madeira wine. One cannot leave the island without trying what we have told is one of the finest wines in the world.

 

Taking a seat we were approached by the owner of the shop:

 

Owner: “ What would you like?”

SailorJack: “ We would like two glasses of Madeira wine please.”

Owner: “ What kind would you like?”

SailorJack: “ Not the most expensive, but not the least expensive.”

 

It was at this point that the owner’s demeanor turned from a friendly smile to a stony glare that would have made Methuselah proud. He seemed to grow in stature and took on what is best described as a towering presence.

 

Owner: “One does not order Madeira wine by price ( …left unsaid was “you idiot”)! You order it by 3,5,10 and dry, sweet, or semi-sweet. What would you like?”

SailorJack: “Ah…”

Owner: “Why doesn’t the lady try a 5 year old sweet and for you a 10 year old semi-sweet.”

 

At this point, under his withering glare I would have agreed to half a barrel of the dry, but agreed to his suggestion.  I only hoped I had enough euros to pay for 5 and 10 year old Madeira wine.

 

Apparently after watching us and seeing our obvious delight in drinking the wine, his displeasure with my initial blunder softened and he brought us a small bowl of olives to complement the wine. So, it came to be that under the warm noonday sun, seated at an outdoor cafe watching locals and visitors walking by, and drinking a delightful glass of Madeira we enjoyed our last port of call and toasted life.

 

DAY 22  - Lisbon, Portugal

 

We are the airport awaiting our flight home. While we reminisced over all that had seen and done in the past three weeks, our real thoughts were of  a more personal nature - in twenty-six hours we will be home and in a real shower!

 

Edited by SailorJack
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  • SailorJack changed the title to Our Journey on the Journey to West Africa - Anyway we Wanted it, But didn't Stop Believing
SailorJack

SailorJack

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14 hours ago, Host Jazzbeau said:

Based on your disappointment that the Canary Islands weren’t named after canaries, I would advise you not to visit the Virgin Islands!  🤣

LOL  I have to remember that one!😀

 

Jack

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SailorJack

SailorJack

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On 4/4/2023 at 10:43 AM, mexico8 said:

OMG - I love your sense of humour.   I  laughed so hard at the "diamonds" story.   I had some really good laughs at your post.   I also have great admiration for Jill!!!!

Good to hear from a fellow Canadian.  Glad you enjoyed the review.  If you enjoyed the humor you may be interested in my other reviews.  Links are in my signature.

 

Jack

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SailorJack

SailorJack

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On 4/14/2023 at 10:51 AM, Baatman said:

Sounds like a great trip - thankyou for the review. We are thinking about a trip on the Onward, how did you like Azamara?

It was an interesting cruise because we had some great ports, but we will not be sailing on Azamara again. As I mentioned in my review, this was our first trip on Azamara and it will be our last - just not our type of cruise line.  That said, I hope you enjoy the Onward.

 

Jack

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Ithikan

Ithikan

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Thank you for writing this piece.  I believe I was able to read all the words - in varying font sizes - but I am left with a question.  You state you'll not cruise again with Azamara and you write graphically of your feelings about the size of bathroom and overly-affectionate shower curtain, is this the main reason?  Are there particulars you are able to share about why this was a one-and-done experience?  Thank you for your time -

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yogagal47

yogagal47

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On 4/17/2023 at 8:45 AM, Ithikan said:

Thank you for writing this piece.  I believe I was able to read all the words - in varying font sizes - but I am left with a question.  You state you'll not cruise again with Azamara and you write graphically of your feelings about the size of bathroom and overly-affectionate shower curtain, is this the main reason?  Are there particulars you are able to share about why this was a one-and-done experience?  Thank you for your time -

So interesting that the poster never answered your question...

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