Husband never knows where he's going

[bhughey]

I was laying in bed last night reading cruise critic (planning our upcoming cruise!) and shared this with my husband, we both laughed out loud because it sounded so much like us! We generally decide on the destination/vacation and from there - I handle 100% of all the decisions from flights, hotels, restaurants, attractions, etc. It's kind of my hobby and I LOOOVE all the research.

[kyriecat]

My husband does not remember ship names, dates, itineraries, hotels, etc. I usually decide on two or three places that I want to visit then tell him the list. He will tell me which he prefers, then I make all the arrangements. I tell him what days to ask for vacation once I have the booking. I'll ask if there is anything in particular he wants to see at a port, but usually I just pick the excursions or narrow it down to two and let him decide. If I left the details up to him to plan, we'd book last minute and just sit on a beach or see if a tour was available that day.

 

My mind works differently. I must have plans in place and usually a year in advance I'll start reading travel guides and making notes of things I want to do or see. I'll narrow the lists down to the must see items and plan around those and fit in a few more, depending on time.

 

I love my husband, but we are totally different people. I am a planner with lists, notes, and maps. He forgets to pack socks if I don't write them down for him. He doesn't care where we go as long as he will have fun.

[markf]

Funny--I, the husband make all the plans--for all the cruises, and I am the one on Crusie critic--wife comes along for the ride, basically.

I want to be her when I grow up!!

[kennetro]

OMG. If I didn't know better, I'd think I started this thread! :-) Not only does he not get involved with the planning aspect, but 6 months after we return, he can't even name the ports we visited! LOL But he sure loves those morning bloody marys & the sea days!

[Bridge Maven]

I do all the research and logistics pertaining to our cruises, but my husband has to approve the itinerary before I book it. While itinerary is important to me on European cruises, I consider Caribbean cruises to be merely an escape from cold Connecticut winters, and could care less about the ports. I would also consider almost any itinerary that leaves from New York/New Jersey if the ship is nice. My husband on the other hand wants an interesting itinerary, which include ports he hasn't been to, for every cruise we take.

 

The only things that really matter to my husband are itinerary and food, while I am more concerned about how nice a ship is and how well it has been maintained. We were on a few Celebrity cruises where there was extensive deferred maintenance in our suite, but my husband didn't care because the food was good.

 

We are now doing research on River cruises, and if it was up to my husband we would book one based solely on itinerary. However, while itinerary for a river cruise is important to me, as well, I am also concerned about having a nice cabin which greatly limits the number of ships we will consider for our river cruise.

[jaspersmommy]

I know that a man with two wives would be a bigamist. What would you call a man with 25 or 30 wives? Sounds like most of us are married to the same man and he's a serial philanderer.

 

I can barely get my husband to show much interest in any of it when planning a vacation, but he always has a great time when we go. I tell him just enough beforehand that he doesn't ask questions about where the money is going LOL. I show him the balcony cabin prices at the time I book the cruise so that he doesn't have a fit, then I book a suite and tuck the money away little bits at a time! By the time we get on the ship, he can't remember what I told him months before.

 

This arrangement suits me just fine.

[ORV]

Funny--I, the husband make all the plans--for all the cruises, and I am the one on Crusie critic--wife comes along for the ride, basically.

I want to be her when I grow up!!

 

Actually there are plenty of us men out here that take care of the details. The only thing my wife has to do is pack her own bag, I pretty much take care of everything else. We decide jointly when and where we're going, after that it's up to me to take care of the details.

[Ma Bell]

This is too funny. We'd never get out of town if I didn't just make the plans. He always gripes and complains that he can't get away but is always happy once we get there.

[Petoonya]

Here's the conversation with my beloved that propelled me to start this thread:

 

Petoonya: Honey, not so sure you know what cruises we have booked.

DH: Well, maybe not.

Petoonya: But you probably should.

DH: Why?

Petoonya: I may not always be here. Do you know where that info is?

He: Not really. Where?

Petoonya: It's in "The Notebook" with all the other important info. Do you know where that is?

He: No, where?

Petoonya: In the file cabinet. Can you look with me so I know that you can find it?

He: It's OK, I'll just call the kids.

 

(less than a minute later)

 

He: Honey, do you know where my phone charger is?

[mafig]

My husband also does not know where he's going.

 

He also doesn't know where he's been. A lot of times he'll look at a recent email and say "hey, this cruise looks good."

 

I'll say "we just did that!" (I have to admit I'm a bit exasperated at this point).

 

He'll say "we did? when?"

 

Me: "Six months ago!"

 

 

[CruiseImage]

I'll self confess to this.... DW does it all, I trust her implicitly therefore don't have to worry a stitch about anything. I just say CELEBRITY and the rest is well..... I guess put together somehow :confused:

 

Thank G for these email signatures we have. Thats my saviour..

Although In my defence I don't forget to do all of the packing and buy most of my wife's evening dresses, which I've never failed on in 10 years of cruising, so Im confident we know each other inside out...

 

Think it's November next.. Transatlantic - nothing much to remember for that trip, except the Martini Bar of course, I never forget about that !! :D

 

Funny thread

[sbt518]

It seems like most couples have one planner and on tag alonger.

 

We are the same, I plan, he comes along. We agree on a destination and then I present him with a few options of ship/itinerary etc we decided and I book.

 

I don't pull the trigger on anything without discussing it with him but he's never changed anything or had any real comments.

 

Just last night I asked him if he had any idea what he wanted to do in Bermuda when we go in October and he said "I thought you had it all planned out already"

To which I replied "I do but I thought I'd give you the opportunity to weigh in if there is anything you are interested in"

Him: "No, I'm sure it is fine."

[Tenn4ever]

Does your spouse/partner/cruise buddy know what you've booked? Get involved at all in planning?

We cruise or do a land vacation every six months or so. My husband lets it be known what he's interested in, then lets me run with it. I let him know what I've booked and what/when we're going. In ten minutes he's forgotten about it. He always enjoys our cruise vacations immensely, but he doesn't care to enter into any discussion pre-cruise or port activity planning.

He doesn't have Alzheimers, and he loves travel. But often a few days before our cruises he'll ask "where are we going again?" And we'll be headed to the airport to catch a flight for Venice while he was thinking all along we were flying an hour away to the grandkids. Then he gets all excited and plunges happily into the adventure.

 

I just booked a Sydney to Hawaii cruise today. Husband said "should be great". He's a peach, but he'll forget. If I died tonight we'd lose the deposit on two cruises ;)

 

Maybe it's just the way it is for cruise families. How does it work for you?

 

Oh, Petoonya, I think our husbands must be brothers. No, my husband doesn't have dementia either unless he's had it since his mid-20s when we were first married. I book and plan all our vacations(land based and cruises) many months to a year in advance. I have a cruise booked now for next April 29 and maybe a trip to France with our daughter's family too. DH never knows the plans and even when we are on the trip he'll ask a dozen time - "what are we doing tomorrow" or "where are we going tomorrow". I think I must have been a travel agent or tour guide in a past life and am now reliving it with my husband..

-

[Denny01]

Here's the conversation with my beloved that propelled me to start this thread:

 

Petoonya: Honey, not so sure you know what cruises we have booked.

DH: Well, maybe not.

Petoonya: But you probably should.

DH: Why?

Petoonya: I may not always be here. Do you know where that info is?

He: Not really. Where?

Petoonya: It's in "The Notebook" with all the other important info. Do you know where that is?

He: No, where?

Petoonya: In the file cabinet. Can you look with me so I know that you can find it?

He: It's OK, I'll just call the kids.

 

(less than a minute later)

 

He: Honey, do you know where my phone charger is?

 

OK, confession time. I may plan out the cruise and tours, but if I didnt have the Internet and emails to search, I'd never find a thing! We used a TA for our upcoming cruise and I must have asked 3 times for our docs or the final payment date and my wife rolls her eyes and reminds me for the umpteenth time here she put them.

 

I especily love it when she sees me frantically looking for something and picks it up exactly where I last left it and she told me to go look there. The terrible part is I Did look there and just didn't see it there!

 

I buy reading glasses by the gross at the Dollar Store.

Den

[Duanerice1]

Actually there are plenty of us men out here that take care of the details. The only thing my wife has to do is pack her own bag, I pretty much take care of everything else. We decide jointly when and where we're going, after that it's up to me to take care of the details.

 

That's us. Here is an excerpt for my trip report talking about this same topic.

 

"Just a side note; my wife never participates in our trip planning. I do not mean this as bad thing, it is just she knows we are going somewhere and all the details will have been taken care of for her. If I ask her opinion, she will let me know, but overall she just trusts me to do the right thing. Now this works well for us because I love to research where we are going. I want to know what is there, where the best places to stay are, what to do, etc. She just knew we were going to Africa on Safari. I think she even knew we were going to the Serengeti and the Crater, but I am not sure. Our running joke is that one day she will surprise me with a trip, having done all the planning herself. Well we have been together a long time and it hasn’t happened yet. Actually when we were walking around Amsterdam (2nd half of the trip) I asked her where we were staying. She had no idea. If we got separated I would have never found her. After that, she kept a business card of the B&B."

 

But she is fine with this as am I. I'm glad we both don;t like to get all the details and make the decision. We'd never get anything done.

enjoy,

Duane

[Ma Bell]

I even plan for friends that say just let me know when we're going and how much I owe.

[Tenn4ever]

This thread is so funny. I'm the TA, tour guide, photographer(except for pictures of me) and his personal valet ( he has never packed a suitcase). I do refuse to polish his shoes and fill his pill box.:D One thing he does do is decide what kind of car we rent since he'll be doing the driving. He says anything that makes me happy makes him happy:)

[buggins0402]

WOW!!! This man has many wives:eek:.

 

Same here....I do about 99.9% of planning...the .1% he does is write the dates on his calendar for time off. And thats after calling me a number of times and asking "when am I suppose to take off?".

 

ROTFL - does my husband have another wife on the side????

[Petoonya]

Oh, Petoonya, I think our husbands must be brothers. No, my husband doesn't have dementia either unless he's had it since his mid-20s when we were first married. I book and plan all our vacations(land based and cruises) many months to a year in advance. I have a cruise booked now for next April 29 and maybe a trip to France with our daughter's family too. DH never knows the plans and even when we are on the trip he'll ask a dozen time - "what are we doing tomorrow" or "where are we going tomorrow". I think I must have been a travel agent or tour guide in a past life and am now reliving it with my husband..

-

 

Tenn....we're on the same cruise! We'll have to get Mr. Tenn and Mr. Petoonya together.

And Mr. Petoonya still does not how to use his Iphone calendar. When he gets the "ding" reminders, he says, "honey, what was that?".

 

 

I'm Mrs. Petoonya and I approve this message.

[packedandready]

I guess I really like doing all the planning. He doesn't complain about anything, just basically does what I want to do. It's not like I don't ask him, I do. He usually just asks what I want to do and then says that sounds like fun.

 

If we were both trying to plan and pull in different directions I can see where that could be a problem.

[bhughey]

WOW!!! This man has many wives:eek:.

 

Same here....I do about 99.9% of planning...the .1% he does is write the dates on his calendar for time off. And thats after calling me a number of times and asking "when am I suppose to take off?".

 

LOLOL! If I had a $1 for every time my husband said "so when do we leave again" - I'd have a lot of vacation money! We have actually set up a shared calendar that we can access from each our phones - I use for dinner plans, weekend's away - everything. I do confess, sometimes I fail to add things to the calendar (because I remember - I don't have to ;)) and he is like "IT WASN'T ON THE CALENDAR!??!"

[coconut1]

My husband is the same way. A co-worker asked him where we were going, and he wasn't sure. He enjoys the cruises, but he doesn't do any of the planning. If it was up to him we would never leave the house. :)

[laxfanmom1]

My DH is exactly the same as most in that he will know next to nothing until the morning that we leave. This has been an ongoing theme throughout our 30 years of marriage although I believe that the older he gets the less he knows about our plans. The thing that he cares most about is whether his cell phone will work when we get there! But if he didn't do all the work that he does we wouldn't be able to do all this traveling. I'm a SAHM (even if 4 of our five kids live elsewhere and the last one is in college!) so I do all the planning of, basically, everything we do.

 

As a slight off topic example: we entertain a lot with many large (100 guests) parties per year. Twenty years ago he used to help with the planning ( okay not the planning but he got the liquor out). Now it's a running joke with our kids that Dad comes to all these parties as if he is a guest (does nothing to help and most times even runs a bit late). But I always say "as long as the guest brings a checkbook to pay the caterers I'm fine with that!".

 

Our travel agent has his CC# on file and she just charges whatever I tell her to his card. It works for us!

[Sinppu]

I do everything. I sometimes ask my husband where he'd like to go, but that's it. I'll tell him when we are going and how much he owes me. Everything else is up to me. He loves it. His memory is terrible, though.

He even asks me sometimes "Have I been to Paris?" (not we, I :rolleyes:) and I'll tell him :D because I also know where he's been without me...

He's in his early thirties :eek:

[Ex-Airbalancer]

I do all the planning and my wife just says "Tell me when the the plane leaves and what the temperature will be like so I can pack the right cloths"

 

I think after 3 cruise is has 5 post on CC

 

Our friends are the same way, he does all the planning also