Ever have awful Table mates?

[Underwatr]

Last orders are 30 minutes after the stated seating time, but we tend not to wait more than 20 minutes.

[Underwatr]

2 minutes ago, zitsky said:

 

Completely disagree.  Courtesy is for everyone not just for people who can't be bothered to show up.

So I guess that puts you among the group that understands why it's polite to let your tablemates know if you're making other plans for dinner.

[Cruzaholic41]

1 minute ago, zitsky said:

 

Completely disagree.  Courtesy is for everyone not just for people who can't be bothered to show up.

 

I think you misunderstood the context of the conversation. That’s what this is about - having the courtesy to tell your table mates you’re not going to be there so they don’t wait. 

 

Some just didn’t understand why others would wait, which showed their own lack of courtesy. 

[zitsky]

3 minutes ago, Cruzaholic41 said:

 

I think you misunderstood the context of the conversation. That’s what this is about - having the courtesy to tell your table mates you’re not going to be there so they don’t wait. 

 

Some just didn’t understand why others would wait, which showed their own lack of courtesy. 

 

Oh I think I see both sides of it.  Pax should wait 15 min then order.  Maybe missing pax didn't tell anyone.  Then those at the table should not wait all night.  Maybe I forgot to tell them I'm not coming.  Should they wait forever?

[Hlitner]

45 minutes ago, zitsky said:

 

Oh I think I see both sides of it.  Pax should wait 15 min then order.  Maybe missing pax didn't tell anyone.  Then those at the table should not wait all night.  Maybe I forgot to tell them I'm not coming.  Should they wait forever?

Life is not that simple.  While those present can certainly push their waiter to take the order, the waiters will often do their best to avoid taking orders (from anyone) in order to give those not present time to show-up.  Also, as unlikely as it might seem to some (or you) it is possible that you have tablemates with good manners who will wait a long time giving you a lot more respect then you gave them by failing to show or notify the MDR.  Those that fail to show and do not bother to notify the dining room are simply being rude to all their tablemates and the staff.  No, they do not wait "forever" but the waiter will try to force at least a 15 minute delay.  Just the fact that you don't seem to find this a big deal says a lot about you.  

 

Folks that do not want to deal with Fixed Dining obligations (and that includes me) should simply opt for Select (open) dining which means they can  show-up when they want to eat or not even bother to show-up at the MDR.  With the open dining concept nobody cares and you are not causing inconvenience for others.  We do understand that we now live in the "Me Me Me" world where many could give a hoot about manners or others.  But that does not make it right.

 

Hank

[zitsky]

4 minutes ago, Hlitner said:

Life is not that simple.  While those present can certainly push their waiter to take the order, the waiters will often do their best to avoid taking orders (from anyone) in order to give those not present time to show-up.  Also, as unlikely as it might seem to some (or you) it is possible that you have tablemates with good manners who will wait a long time giving you a lot more respect then you gave them by failing to show or notify the MDR.  Those that fail to show and do not bother to notify the dining room are simply being rude to all their tablemates and the staff.  No, they do not wait "forever" but the waiter will try to force at least a 15 minute delay.  Just the fact that you don't seem to find this a big deal says a lot about you.  

 

Folks that do not want to deal with Fixed Dining obligations (and that includes me) should simply opt for Select (open) dining which means they can  show-up when they want to eat or not even bother to show-up at the MDR.  With the open dining concept nobody cares and you are not causing inconvenience for others.  We do understand that we now live in the "Me Me Me" world where many could give a hoot about manners or others.  But that does not make it right.

 

Hank

 

Thanks for the rudeness while trying to educate me about courtesy.

 

I agree that select dining is a good idea for some.

[MicCanberra]

4 hours ago, Underwatr said:

So I guess that puts you among the group that understands why it's polite to let your tablemates know if you're making other plans for dinner.

That would be courteous.

[DarrenM]

I wish there was a consensus on this topic. One minute I want a table for 2, then I think it would be good to meet new folk, and then I am back to wanting a table for 2.😩

 

 

[MicCanberra]

7 minutes ago, DarrenM said:

I wish there was a consensus on this topic. One minute I want a table for 2, then I think it would be good to meet new folk, and then I am back to wanting a table for 2.😩

 

 

I suggest you pick the anytime dining and then ask to share on the nights where you feel like sharing.

[julie3fan]

23 minutes ago, DarrenM said:

I wish there was a consensus on this topic.

 

On Cruise Critic?  LOL! 🤣

[MicCanberra]

4 minutes ago, julie3fan said:

 

On Cruise Critic?  LOL! 🤣

Yeah, a place where the only thing we can even agree on what is that we like to cruise.

[ontheweb]

4 hours ago, MicCanberra said:

Yeah, a place where the only thing we can even agree on what is that we like to cruise.

Except for those who no longer approve of cruising because the ships have got too large, or the cutbacks are too much, or the environment is being ruined, or tipping is required, etc.

[navybankerteacher]

3 minutes ago, ontheweb said:

Except for those who no longer approve of cruising because the ships have got too large, or the cutbacks are too much, or the environment is being ruined, or tipping is required, etc.

I take it that you disapprove of people who just might  prefer smaller ships, who might like well-prepared food well served and are willing to pay for quality, and who recognize that it might be a good idea to not leave a trail of trash or pollution behind us, or who happen to feel that people who go out of their way to provide good service might deserve more than some guaranteed across-the-board minimum wage.

[MicCanberra]

16 minutes ago, navybankerteacher said:

I take it that you disapprove of people who just might  prefer smaller ships, who might like well-prepared food well served and are willing to pay for quality, and who recognize that it might be a good idea to not leave a trail of trash or pollution behind us, or who happen to feel that people who go out of their way to provide good service might deserve more than some guaranteed across-the-board minimum wage.

I think the point was (and you have proved it) is that cc members cannot agree on even the love of cruising.

[zitsky]

7 hours ago, DarrenM said:

I wish there was a consensus on this topic. One minute I want a table for 2, then I think it would be good to meet new folk, and then I am back to wanting a table for 2.😩

 

 

 

Sorry. I've done both but I prefer a shared table.  I talk to my partner every day.  On a cruise it's nice to talk to more people.

 

I try to show up on time.  I will admit it's reasonable to expect that.

[K32682]

The consensus would seem to be a quite reasonable 15-20 minute interlude is appropriate for the tardy and missing in action after which ordering may commence.   If and when they do arrive is an apology or explanation expected? In the absence of either what is the appropriate response from the other diners?  A stern rebuke, gentle reproach, sarcastic remark, withering stare, shunning? 

[navybankerteacher]

1 minute ago, K32682 said:

The consensus would seem to be a quite reasonable 15-20 minute interlude is appropriate for the tardy and missing in action after which ordering may commence.   If and when they do arrive is an apology or explanation expected? In the absence of either what is the appropriate response from the other diners?  A stern rebuke, gentle reproach, sarcastic remark, withering stare, shunning? 

Except, perhaps, for those who believe that revenge is sweet, a gentle reproach  seems to be the obvious (and civilized) response.  

[zitsky]

6 minutes ago, K32682 said:

The consensus would seem to be a quite reasonable 15-20 minute interlude is appropriate for the tardy and missing in action after which ordering may commence.   If and when they do arrive is an apology or explanation expected? In the absence of either what is the appropriate response from the other diners?  A stern rebuke, gentle reproach, sarcastic remark, withering stare, shunning? 

 

Is this the first and only time they are late?  Or are they always late?

[VennDiagram]

29 minutes ago, K32682 said:

The consensus would seem to be a quite reasonable 15-20 minute interlude is appropriate for the tardy and missing in action after which ordering may commence.   If and when they do arrive is an apology or explanation expected? In the absence of either what is the appropriate response from the other diners?  A stern rebuke, gentle reproach, sarcastic remark, withering stare, shunning? 

 

I would quietly ask "Is everything okay?" directly to one of the latecomers.  Their lateness noted, concern expressed.  Then it is up to the latecomers to take the hint and apologize/explain, or reply with a discreet "yes, thanks for checking". 

 

[julie3fan]

33 minutes ago, VennDiagram said:

 

I would quietly ask "Is everything okay?" directly to one of the latecomers.  Their lateness noted, concern expressed.  Then it is up to the latecomers to take the hint and apologize/explain, or reply with a discreet "yes, thanks for checking". 

 

 

So civil, without judgement...I love it!

[cruisemom42]

2 hours ago, K32682 said:

If and when they do arrive is an apology or explanation expected? In the absence of either what is the appropriate response from the other diners?  A stern rebuke, gentle reproach, sarcastic remark, withering stare, shunning? 

 

I believe pelting the late-comers with hard rolls is an option that should not be overlooked.

 

[LandlockedCruiser01]

12 minutes ago, cruisemom42 said:

 

I believe pelting the late-comers with hard rolls is an option that should not be overlooked.

 

In my first job, which had a somewhat informal culture, we did a not-so-subtle shaming tactic on people who came late to a meeting.  Whenever a late-comer walked into the conference room, people already seated would do a brief round of applause.

[slidergirl]

The "late/no show" issue reminds me of school days:  If the teacher or professor didn't show up within 10 minutes of the bell, we were free to leave.    Maybe do this in reverse - if someone doesn't show up at the table within 10 minutes, they are denied access.  If I had plans post-dinner and I was counting on starting dinner on time, do I get up and leave or do I kindly but forcefully tell my server that I have plans and to please take my order?   (hypothetical, since you all know I prefer to dine solo)

[ontheweb]

5 hours ago, MicCanberra said:

5 hours ago, navybankerteacher said:

I take it that you disapprove of people who just might  prefer smaller ships, who might like well-prepared food well served and are willing to pay for quality, and who recognize that it might be a good idea to not leave a trail of trash or pollution behind us, or who happen to feel that people who go out of their way to provide good service might deserve more than some guaranteed across-the-board minimum wage.

No, you misinterpreted what I wrote. What I was trying to convey was that even among the cruisecritic community there are those who no longer have a love of cruising.

 

[zitsky]

27 minutes ago, cruisemom42 said:

 

I believe pelting the late-comers with hard rolls is an option that should not be overlooked.

 

 

Oh the humanity!  Where are the mods?