Rudeness and bad manners - in the eye of the beholder?

The recent thread about hats in the MDR made me think about how subjective good manners really are. I was reminded of a thread on another CC board when someone was complaining how ill mannered it is when people save a table in the buffet and take it in turns to get their food. Some agreed and some could not understand what the problem was. Personally I think it is common sense which means in this person's eyes we are being very rude doing this.

It makes me wonder what other behaviour some find perfectly normal and others consider rude. Anyone have any examples of this? What behaviour have you come across, on a cruise in particular, which seems rude to you but may not to them, otherwise they presumably would not be doing it.

I know there are bound to be difference between nationalities and age groups but I think it makes an interesting discussion, if we can keep it friendly:)

My biggest on-board peeve is folks who force and rush unto elevators before letting out those getting off.

I don't care what people wear as long as I don't have to see parts of the body best left covered....

BUT, it really irks me when people eat directly from the buffet with their hands - yes, I have observed several instances on different ships of people reaching in with their hands multiple times and eating....

I don't care what people wear as long as I don't have to see parts of the body best left covered....

 

BUT, it really irks me when people eat directly from the buffet with their hands - yes, I have observed several instances on different ships of people reaching in with their hands multiple times and eating....

:eek::eek:

BUT, it really irks me when people eat directly from the buffet with their hands - yes, I have observed several instances on different ships of people reaching in with their hands multiple times and eating....

Earlier this week we weer at a cocktail party for the re-opening of the Rainbow Room in NYC, a fancy affair. But we were shocked by some people's behavior which included a man in front of me taking an oyster from the buffet and istead of placing it on his plate, gulped it down and then looked around for a place to put the empty shell. I thought he was going to plonk it down amongst the other oysters! So he just put it down on the table next to the stack of plates and eating utensils. SMH

All too often we have witnessed people eating directly from the buffet -- especially in the cheese area -- just reach with their hands and take watch cheeses they want. Rolls and bread is another bad area.

• People filling their own water bottles directly in the lido despite the signs saying not to.
   
  
• People barking orders at wait and bar staff without so much as a please or thank you.
   
  
• People pushing in front of our kids in the tender lines on the stair cases cutting us off from our children
   
  
• People removing the hotel service charge and justifying it
   
  
• Able bodied folks using an elevator for one floor
   
  
• People who refuse to use the hand sanitizer before going into the buffet lines
  

• People filling their own water bottles directly in the lido despite the signs saying not to.
  
• People barking orders at wait and bar staff without so much as a please or thank you.
  
• People pushing in front of our kids in the tender lines on the stair cases cutting us off from our children
  
• People removing the hotel service charge and justifying it
  
• Able bodied folks using an elevator for one floor
  
• People who refuse to use the hand sanitizer before going into the buffet lines
  

I just want to warn everyone that not all people who look able-bodied are. They might have recently had surgery, or they might have a disorder like MS. You really can't tell.

You think able bodied folks using elevators for 1 floor is rude??? :mad:

You can't tell if someone is "able bodied" or not just by looking. A heart condition, a lung condition, blisters on the feet, a sore ankle or knee and any number of other things would take a person out of the "able bodied" category and you would never know it if they didn't tell you.

The elevators are in the ships to be used by anyone and everyone who wants to use them.:D

My biggest on-board peeve is folks who force and rush unto elevators before letting out those getting off.

Agree.

Helen

My biggest on-board peeve is folks who force and rush unto elevators before letting out those getting off.

Brig. Summary hearing. Gang plank. :) Perhaps some lashes for good measure.

My pet peeve is people who step off the elevator and stop - blocking everyone behind them.

Also, people who stand in the stairwells talking.

Why can people be conscious that there are other people besides themselves.

You think able bodied folks using elevators for 1 floor is rude??? :mad:

 

You can't tell if someone is "able bodied" or not just by looking. A heart condition, a lung condition, blisters on the feet, a sore ankle or knee and any number of other things would take a person out of the "able bodied" category and you would never know it if they didn't tell you.

 

The elevators are in the ships to be used by anyone and everyone who wants to use them.:D

I'm one of those people. If you see me walking around most days you'd say there's nothing wrong with me (my wife would be quick to set you straight that I've never been quite right :D). I have a knee that can go out at any time and it is far less painful to fall on a flat floor than on a staircase. Therefore I use the elevators and if I did use the stairs an able bodied person could go up three decks before I got up one. No I don't use a cane which I should because in my warped mind I would be giving in to it.

My biggest on-board peeve is folks who force and rush unto elevators before letting out those getting off.

I very much agree with this....I think it is very rude.

I also don't like when folks get on an elevator, or in are in close proximity in a crowded space, and start griping about everything that peeves them on the cruise to anyone who will listen. I am having a good time, don't rain on my parade! Go tell someone in ship management who can do something about your complaints, don't tell me!!!!

Loud talking in the passageways early in the morning or late at night.

Leaving your verandah light on at night when your not there. :mad:

My biggest on-board peeve is folks who force and rush unto elevators before letting out those getting off.

True, but that's not specific to being onboard ships. Those same people rush the elevators on land, they do the same getting on trains, buses, through any door, in fact.:rolleyes: That was my biggest peeve when I was commuting and working in an office tower.

I think we have lost the point of this thread, which is differences in cultural behavioral norms (Consider the differences in driver behavior in Italy, Germany, and GB) that might affect cruise "manners". For instance, in some countries people queue up in an orderly for nearly everything, whether necessary or not, without instructions to do so, but other nationalities consider this absurd.

Kids taking over the pools and jumping in with complete disregard for others in the pool and parents close by.

Kids using their hands in the buffet foods. Adults doing the same thing, but I

have mostly observed kids doing it.

People rushing into elevators before those inside can exit.

Kids rushing in front of us to be first in line for anything.

Passengers being rude to cruise ship crew members.

Unruly young children up and about after midnight being sassy and swearing at adults - this is probably more of a Carnival irritation than HAL, especially junior high kids. Do their parents not really care or know where they are?

Obnoxious tablemates - that's why we only do 2-person tables now. Couples making out at the dinner table is so inappropriate. Again, probably more of a Carnival thing than HAL.

I can say those things about Carnival because look below my message and see how many Carnival cruises we have been on. So many because they are so convenient to where we live and they have lots of 4-5 days cruises, where HAL doesn't.

When 2 couples are in a narrow hallway and the 2 couples approach each other, and one couple refuses to slide over to let the other couple pass them....it happens on sidewalks, too...Do they not see the others?

I think we have lost the point of this thread, which is differences in cultural behavioral norms (Consider the differences in driver behavior in Italy, Germany, and GB) that might affect cruise "manners". For instance, in some countries people queue up in an orderly for nearly everything, whether necessary or not, without instructions to do so, but other nationalities consider this absurd.

It makes me wonder what other behaviour some find perfectly normal and others consider rude. Anyone have any examples of this? What behaviour have you come across, on a cruise in particular, which seems rude to you but may not to them, otherwise they presumably would not be doing it.

Even within the US there are different standards of behavioral norms. BIL once took a cruise sailing from different port than from where he typically sails. I pointed out to him that there would be a LARGE number of passengers from the region surrounding that port. That region is known for having a more 'in your face' attitude, which is perfectly acceptable there, but quite different than to what he is accustomed. BIL didn't think this would be any problem but came home saying "never again". I'm sure his fellow passengers weren't doing anything they considered "rude" but his perception was different. He had such a bad experience that FIL canceled an upcoming cruise sailing from the same region.

My biggest on-board peeve is folks who force and rush unto elevators before letting out those getting off.

:eek:- I will usually say , loudly, "excuse me , people getting off here "

that will make them back off, and this coming from a very shy canadian girl,,:cool:

You think able bodied folks using elevators for 1 floor is rude??? :mad:

 

You can't tell if someone is "able bodied" or not just by looking. A heart condition, a lung condition, blisters on the feet, a sore ankle or knee and any number of other things would take a person out of the "able bodied" category and you would never know it if they didn't tell you.

 

The elevators are in the ships to be used by anyone and everyone who wants to use them.:D

One has no idea of heart problems, respiratory issues or other not immediately visible conditions.

:eek:- I will usually say , loudly, "excuse me , people getting off here "

that will make them back off, and this coming from a very shy canadian girl,,:cool:

I think that's just fine. Why would anyone object to your saying they need to step aside to let people exit? If they didn't have the manners to pause when the elevator door opened to see if anyone was getting off, they have no reason to object to your stating that.

Folks who remove their shoes and prop up their feet on an adjacent chair. I'm not aware of any country where this would be a cultural norm.

:eek:- I will usually say , loudly, "excuse me , people getting off here "

that will make them back off, and this coming from a very shy canadian girl,,:cool:

lol! But would'nt that be rude

"Leaving your verandah light on at night when your not there."

Agreed. If it were up to me, these folks would be keel-hauled.;)