Convincing people to cruise

[lenquixote66]

The only kind of trip I can do is a cruise. I cannot drive. I last drove 16 years ago.I cannot be on a plane.The last time I flew was 9 years ago. I cannot ride on a train.

 

[ilikeanswers]

8 minutes ago, lenquixote66 said:

The only kind of trip I can do is a cruise. I cannot drive. I last drove 16 years ago.I cannot be on a plane.The last time I flew was 9 years ago. I cannot ride on a train.

 

 

I don't want to sound insensitive but it sounds to me like you are really only thinking of yourself 😕.  I am sorry that your travelling options are so limited and understand you really want to travel with these friends but if they were to compromise their travel style for you what would you be willing to compromise?  For example (and I have to make up an example since you still haven't detailed your friends' travel interests😒) if your friends are into immersive holidays would you be willing to give up the 24 hour entertainment ship and go on a small expedition cruise?

[GeezerCouple]

3 minutes ago, ilikeanswers said:

 

I don't want to sound insensitive but it sounds to me like you are really only thinking of yourself 😕.  I am sorry that your travelling options are so limited and understand you really want to travel with these friends but if they were to compromise their travel style for you what would you be willing to compromise?  For example (and I have to make up an example since you still haven't detailed your friends' travel interests😒) if your friends are into immersive holidays would you be willing to give up the 24 hour entertainment ship and go on a small expedition cruise?

 

Or go to a large hotel, with pools and some entertainment, for a few days?

There are some hotels, even if not "all in ones" that do have a lot of services, pool/hot tub, and nightclubs, several restaurants, etc.

Take a car service for a modest distance if necessary.

 

And if your answer is that you wouldn't enjoy that type of short vacation, well... then that would be similar to what your friends have been telling you about cruising.

Of if that *would* be okay, to find a way to share a few days together, then that should work so as to satisfy all of you.

 

I assume that your goal is to be able to share the time together, correct?

Because if that's not it, then there's absolutely no reason to try to convince them of how to spend their time, beyond a gentle suggestion of something they may not be familiar with.  Beyond that, it's up to them, period.

GC

[Korimako]

We once (first and only time) cruised - a repositioning from San Diego back to NZ - as a means of getting home after several months in Europe.

We thoroughly enjoyed it - lots of sea days and for me, no thoughts about should I be putting some washing on/doing some vacuuming/tidying ? But would never consider cruising again as a vacation. Typically we spend several months in Europe - staying put in a rental, mostly France - and cruising doesn't begin to fulfil our criteria.  The 'pick and mix' cruise style of travel is not our way. No way would we be happy with only 12 hours in any European port. So yes, you could never convince us to spend $$$ on a cruise vacation, no matter how good friends we were with you😀!

[SRF]

14 hours ago, SantaFeFan said:

 

Wow! Doesn't want to cruise and now she is your ex. I guess that was a deal breaker, eh?  😁 😇

 

Nope, had nothing to do with it.

[iancal]

I am at a loss as to why you would even consider trying to convince your friends to cruise when they have clearly indicted their disinterest.  Is this an ego thing on your part?  Do you do the same with food preferences or preferred colors?  Very strange.

Edited February 4, 2019 by iancal

[lenquixote66]

37 minutes ago, iancal said:

I am at a loss as to why you would even consider trying to convince your friends to cruise when they have clearly indicted their disinterest.  Is this an ego thing on your part?  Do you do the same with food preferences or preferred colors?  Very strange.

 

38 minutes ago, iancal said:

I am at a loss as to why you would even consider trying to convince your friends to cruise when they have clearly indicted their disinterest.  Is this an ego thing on your part?  Do you do the same with food preferences or preferred colors?  Very strange.

 

38 minutes ago, iancal said:

I am at a loss as to why you would even consider trying to convince your friends to cruise when they have clearly indicted their disinterest.  Is this an ego thing on your part?  Do you do the same with food preferences or preferred colors?  Very strange.

The only kind of trip I can do is a cruise. I cannot drive. I last drove 16 years ago.I cannot be on a plane.The last time I flew was 9 years ago. I cannot ride on a train.

10 hours ago, GeezerCouple said:

 

Or go to a large hotel, with pools and some entertainment, for a few days?

There are some hotels, even if not "all in ones" that do have a lot of services, pool/hot tub, and nightclubs, several restaurants, etc.

Take a car service for a modest distance if necessary.

 

And if your answer is that you wouldn't enjoy that type of short vacation, well... then that would be similar to what your friends have been telling you about cruising.

Of if that *would* be okay, to find a way to share a few days together, then that should work so as to satisfy all of you.

 

I assume that your goal is to be able to share the time together, correct?

Because if that's not it, then there's absolutely no reason to try to convince them of how to spend their time, beyond a gentle suggestion of something they may not be familiar with.  Beyond that, it's up to them, period.

GC

Wow,you people on here have inspired me. My next novel may just be about people who post on cruise message boards.

[h_blond2]

I don't try to convince anyone that cruising is for them. However, I do tell them about my experiences and offer any help I can provide if they choose to book a cruise. For some people, cruising has no appeal and that's totally fine.

[K32682]

40 minutes ago, lenquixote66 said:

Wow,you people on here have inspired me. My next novel may just be about people who post on cruise message boards.

 

Maybe your next novel should be about people who can't take "no" for an answer.  

 

You've unsuccessfully attempted to cajole your friends to take a cruise.  You are here to discover if there is some other means of convincing them to change their mind.  When you didn't get the answers you wanted you criticized posters for negativity are now threatening to write a book about it. 

 

Has it occurred to you their unwillingness to cruise is less about cruising itself and more about not wanting to cruise with you?  

Edited February 4, 2019 by K32682

[SantaFeFan]

26 minutes ago, K32682 said:

 

Has it occurred to you their unwillingness to cruise is less about cruising itself and more about not wanting to cruise with you?  

 

And we have a winning answer. If the OP reacts to his friend's refusals (and that friend must be a saint) the same way he reacts to the logical answers he is getting to his self serving question, I certainly wouldn't want to take a cruise with him. Who would willing allow themselves to be trapped for several days in a row with an "it's all about me" so-called friend????

[TonyB17]

Add me to the list of not trying to convince anyone.

 

Some people love Hawaii, others think it's nothing but sitting on a beach and they're not interested.

Some people think Las Vegas is the best vacation spot in the world, some can't stand it.

 

I enjoy both for very different reasons and I'd never try to convince someone that they should. 

 

My ex thought she'd like cruising and she didn't.  The fact that I like it, or you like it, or that millions of people like it, really isn't the point.  I certainly wouldn't want someone to try to convince me to eat their favorite food after I'd already told them I didn't like it.

 

[sfaaa]

18 hours ago, lenquixote66 said:

Except for DaveKathy everyone is so negative here.It reminds me of a Twilight Zone episode.

You seem to have a problem accepting NO for an answer. Why? Better figure out the answer fast before you risk losing your old friends for good.

[Toofarfromthesea]

22 hours ago, spookwife said:

  Plenty of people in my circle don’t like cruising.   And that’s okay.  

Yup.  It's not a one-size-fits-all world.

[ger_77]

A number of years ago, we really wanted friends of ours to come cruising with us, and tried telling them all the wonderful things we had experienced, to no avail.  We finally gave up and continued cruising on our own.  Unbeknownst to us, they booked an Alaskan cruise and didn't tell us about it until they got home.  They hated it.  They hated everything about it.  The food, the people, the ship, the excursions,  you name it!  

 

Honestly we were so glad they took the trip on their own, as we would have felt terrible, knowing we had cajoled them into coming with us and then having what seems to have been the worst vacation ever.  Lesson learned; if people say they don't want to cruise, we just leave them to whatever type of vacationing they wish and we continue to enjoy cruising.  Sure, it's nice to cruise with friends, but only if they enjoy the same type of travel as you do.

 

Smooth Sailing!  🙂🙂🙂

[LH25]

On 2/3/2019 at 8:26 AM, lenquixote66 said:

rue,but I have yet to meet anyone who hated cruising ,have you ?

Yes, I know two people who went on a cruise, and hated it.

 

Do you really want to be responsible for talking them into it and having them hate it?

[martincath]

18 hours ago, lenquixote66 said:

The only kind of trip I can do is a cruise. I cannot drive. I last drove 16 years ago.I cannot be on a plane.The last time I flew was 9 years ago. I cannot ride on a train.

 

Now who's being negative? 😉

 

Serious question Len, in an attempt to offer a positive suggestion about being able to travel with those friends of yours: how do you manage to get to your cruises? Or take excursions in ports, which I seem to recall you posting about a few times? Is sitting in a car rather than driving still possible for you? What about buses? Small boats rather than large ones? And how in the heck did you intend to get to the Mediterranean with them to cruise there - would it have to fit around a Transatlantic spring repo and then see you staying over in Europe until Fall?

 

I ask because if you can sit for an extended time in a car or bus seat, well then coach-based vacations are plentiful and might be a better bet for your friends. Trains generally also offer a much smoother ride than cars or buses, plus the ability to get up and stretch your legs any time - I actually know a few folks who have various issues that make planes and cars and buses very awkward for them, but trains work just fine. Everyone I know who ever gets any motion sickness on a train it's because they are sitting backwards, but with 4 people you'd have all the seats around a table and be able to choose who sits where.

 

Or what about a river cruise? Those definitely hit up some nice cultural sites and activities that ocean cruising typically doesn't, so that might be an acceptable compromise on both sides - still cruising but also avoiding many of the concerns of non-cruisers about huge crowds, no chance of immersion, fears of sinking while far out on the ocean...

 

All of this is just spit-balling though - I still know diddly about your friends other than they must be over 70 and apparently don't want to cruise! I will happily be one of your characters in that novel though, just make sure I'm sufficiently surly and sweary;-)

[SRF]

8 hours ago, h_blond2 said:

I don't try to convince anyone that cruising is for them. However, I do tell them about my experiences and offer any help I can provide if they choose to book a cruise. For some people, cruising has no appeal and that's totally fine.

 

This ^^^^^^

 

I point out what I like about cruising.  And tell them that there are options even there.

[Etta1213]

I think LEN is dealing with some heavyweight mobility issues. My DH won't fly, so we only cruise from a port we can drive to in a reasonable amt of time. It would be natural to wish dear friends would join his trip. LEN, i hope the responses weren't hurtful. (Years ago, I pressured my parents into going to a movie, though my mom hesitated due to her faith. The memory makes me cringe to this day.) People sometimes might not want to provide actual reasons. I have an acquaintance who is afraid of water but might not want to say so.

[GUT2407]

5 hours ago, fyree39 said:

Editors are your friend! I'm just talking punctuation, you know.

 

I really don't understand why you insist others should like what you like.  Why don't you drive, fly or ride a train?  That's so limiting and you really should be convinced to do all of those things. What can I say to convince you to fly to a port or take a train across Canada?

Flying driving and train riding could be health issues.

 

Mrs Gut has a neurological condition that is impacted by pressure changes, take off and landing could kill her.

 

driving, for me is a major issue, a few spinal troubles mean sitting for more that the shortest period can leave me rolling on the floor in agony.

 

i haven’t used a train for years because even if I take my wheelchair, so I have a chair I can sit in for a bit longer the jilting and swaying is too much.

 

just me own examples of the road trips and flights are for us “Out”.

 

OPs issues may be different, but shows some issues folk face

[ilikeanswers]

10 hours ago, lenquixote66 said:

Wow,you people on here have inspired me. My next novel may just be about people who post on cruise message boards. 

 

What do you want from the posters🤷‍♀️? You have gotten some good advice despite how little information you have provided about your friends. The best we could do is suggest cruises that may be the best match to you and your friends' travel styles. At the end of the day both of you will have to compromise if you want to travel together.

[angie7911922]

I know quite a few people that don't like cruising for varies reasons - either they don't like to let go of control, they like to do things at their pace (not the boats), they get seasick, etc. 

While I agree that everyone should try it once (because it's amazing), I think if your friends truly don't want to go, you should respect their decision and not try to talk them into it. 

[GUT2407]

50 minutes ago, fyree39 said:

I was, in my stumbling way, trying to point out that people have very good reasons for refusing to do something. In lenquixote and your cases, the reasons are just as valid for not using this type of transport as the reasons are for the OPs friends not wanting to cruise.

I must have misunderstood I’m sorry.

 

but I agree the friends could have very valid objections, but even should you, I or anyone else (including the poster) think the objections aren’t valid, it doesn’t matter, I don’t understand how anyone could take the view that they have the right to try and change the friends mind. If a “friend” was hassling, try to pressure me  etc, into going on a camping trip after I explained that I was interested they would remain on my friends list too long.

Edited February 5, 2019 by GUT2407

[SRF]

We do cruise vacations and land vacations.

 

For land, we like the flexibility to do what looks interesting, to vary from our plan.

 

For cruises, we like the cruising.  We don't want a floating amusement park.  We like relaxing, and not HAVING to do anything.  If we do something great, if we end up by the pool, great.  Or taking a nap.  Or whatever.

 

If someone had convinced us to do a typical Med cruise as our first cruise, it would probably have been our last.

 

And again, some people just don't like cruising.

 

We are all different.

 

As stated, I tell people who haven't cruised, about the things and the options, and let them decide.

[Zach1213]

This may sound odd since I am posting on a cruise website (though, to be fair, I usually stick to the Cruise Air portion because I am a frequent flier, not a frequent cruiser), but I am still not sold on cruises. The first one I went on, I went in with too high of expectations and really disliked it. The second time, I went in with low expectations and enjoyed it a lot more. But I may or may not ever go on another cruise.

 

My point is that if you spend a bunch of time trying to convince someone to go on a trip they may not want to by hyping it up, as happened to me the first time, you may end up just leaving them disappointed when they go. I don't understand the notion that everyone needs to like cruising...who cares if they don't want to cruise? That doesn't mean you can't. I'm sure there are plenty of things you're not interested in that others are, but how often are they pushing it on you?

[pacruise804]

On 2/3/2019 at 10:34 PM, lenquixote66 said:

The only kind of trip I can do is a cruise. I cannot drive. I last drove 16 years ago.I cannot be on a plane.The last time I flew was 9 years ago. I cannot ride on a train.

 

 

I'm assuming it is very important to you to vacation with your friends, and also that you are able to ride in a car even if you don't drive (how else do you get to the port?).  Is it possible to do a "staycation" in the NYC area with your friends taking in the sights?  

 

Are there any compromises you could make like a town with a bed and breakfast then local sightseeing?

 

On 2/4/2019 at 5:53 AM, Korimako said:

We once (first and only time) cruised - a repositioning from San Diego back to NZ - as a means of getting home after several months in Europe.

We thoroughly enjoyed it - lots of sea days and for me, no thoughts about should I be putting some washing on/doing some vacuuming/tidying ? But would never consider cruising again as a vacation. Typically we spend several months in Europe - staying put in a rental, mostly France - and cruising doesn't begin to fulfil our criteria.  The 'pick and mix' cruise style of travel is not our way. No way would we be happy with only 12 hours in any European port. So yes, you could never convince us to spend $$$ on a cruise vacation, no matter how good friends we were with you😀!

 

I'm genuinely curious - what does this forum offer you if you are not interested in cruising?