Crying Myself to Sleep on the Biggest Cruise Ship Ever

[kaymoz]

A friend posted a link to a story in The Atlantic about the author's seven "agonizing" nights on Royal's Icon of the Seas, titled as above.  I was curious to read it, but the link basically required subscibing, which I didn't want to do. 

Has anyone read this story, and would you care to share about it?

Edited May 30 by kaymoz
clarity

[taglovestocruise]

A little paste and copy.

He went in planning to hate it, pre-skewering his fellow passengers, and looking for a sardonic angle. He traveled alone and was shocked that he was not immediately adopted by others on the ship for whom he obviously felt contempt (and therefore dressed accordingly) and who had spent their personal money (not their expense account)to enjoy their time with people who actually liked them. He expects to be entertained, because he obviously has a problem entertaining himself, but sneers at all the entertainments for which he has been comped. He does little but complain about a luxurious suite. He spends an inordinate amount of time making ethnic-centered comments about the staff on the ship, and notes specifically that the language he can hear through his vents is Spanish. This is all on the first day, and most before they have left port.

 

Shteyngart ended exactly where he started, with nothing but contempt for the "kind of people" who take cruises, and nine thousand words is a long way to go to take the reader exactly nowhere. I found myself wondering if smug condescension of the "creative class" toward their perceived cultural enemies (i.e., "middle America") is really what this country needs right now, and why The Atlantic's editors would publish something like this. But after dropping $19,000 on Shteyngart's suite, plus whatever they paid for his verbiage, they probably didn't have much choice but to run it.

[smokeybandit]

It's not worth reading. Just someone who was asked to write a story about why cruising sucks and then nit picked every little thing (most of which were the author's own fault) to justify the assignment.

[Ashland]

Well I can say our extended family that included our 2 grandsons just got off Icon on May 25th loved it. We had two Surfside Suites and saw all the shows and ate at most all the comp eateries and had an amazing time.

 

FYI for those that care...Mario was on our cruise. Not that that made any difference.

[Another_Critic]

24 minutes ago, Ashland said:

FYI for those that care...Mario was on our cruise. Not that that made any difference.

I met Mario on last month's Oasis TA.

[Tlbecker1]

2 minutes ago, Another_Critic said:

I met Mario on last month's Oasis TA.

Me too.

[ajtaylor29]

I read it, and agree that his assignment was to write an entertaining article about how silly everything is on a giant cruise ship, and he succeeded in doing that! It WAS well-written (i'll give him that) but of course was so off the mark for this audience (those of us who love to cruise) as to be laughable.

No one could have such a bad time unless they were really trying (which he was).

It was just the sort of fluff piece that gets cited by non-cruisers as "see, this is why i will NEVER get on a ship"......But those of us who know, know. Don't we??? 🙂

[Mum2Mercury]

40 minutes ago, Ashland said:

FYI for those that care...Mario was on our cruise. Not that that made any difference.

Super Mario?  I met him last year ... or maybe two years ago on Explorer.  

[Jetdriver787]

Deja vu?

 

Wasn’t this last months news?

 

Personally, I found it quite amusing, which I think was the authors intent? This type of article is clearly a mix of fact, opinion and hyperbole and designed to be an entertaining piece of prose  rather than a surveyors report! 

 

 

[Crazy planning mom]

I am in 2 book clubs and read some of his prior novels.  I gathered from his previous writings that he is generally pessimistic about most things in life.

[HBE4]

2 hours ago, kaymoz said:

Has anyone read this story, and would you care to share about it?

 

I don't think it was meant to be a serious cruise review but rather an absurdist, satirical article with over-the-top dark humor, so not for everyone. I found it generally enjoyable and worth a chuckle or two but there were some edgy. borderline mean-spirited comments that I can see some finding offensive. 

 

If you're a fan of Don Rickles insult comedy or being the subject of a Tom Brady-like Roast, then you'll enjoy it.

[BecciBoo]

36 minutes ago, ajtaylor29 said:

"see, this is why i will NEVER get on a ship"

And I sure hope they don't.............

[djneph]

Maybe he secretly loves cruises and just wants prices to go down a bit and have a chance at royal-up bids being accepted. So, he tells everyone cruising sucks and maybe prices will come down.

 

Though more likely it is he who sucks. 

 

[Sizzlechest]

Here's the article: https://12ft.io/https://www.theatlantic.com/magazine/archive/2024/05/royal-caribbean-cruise-ship-icon-of-seas/677838/

 

He's the actual CHUD meme face.

[Tatka]

   There are people who simply don’t like cruises. My parents went on 5, but still don’t like them. They only went for itineraries. They cannot see people eating non stop and they don’t like sea days.. and evenings oh ships. They travel a lot independently so it’s not because they are uncomfortable in other countries. 
Actually many people we know don’t like cruises… They like to feel countries… rent a condo and experience real life in Paris for example. They cannot stand crowds.

 

We LOVE cruises and do 5 a year… 

 

People are different,

[elizabethbp]

Thank you Sizzlechest for your post.  I refused to subscribe to read it.  I disagree completely that this article is typical of Don Rickles.  Don was  not woke, and this author clearly is. He is patronizing and elitist.  Sure there are lots of types of people on cruises, but I have been cruising for almost 40 years and love it.  I finally made Diamond.  The author completely misses the point of cruising- for me, nothing can beat sitting on my balcony, or at the pool or solarium, and watching the ocean go by.   I actually feel sorry for the author.

[BirdTravels]

There are people who are going to say anything to "get clicks" and churn up publicity for them selves to make $$$

[la_croisiere_s'amuse]

Is this the "Daddy's Little Meatball" guy? I remember reading that and thinking ... wow ... if that's your idea of an icebreaker ... 😬

[Sizzlechest]

6 minutes ago, la_croisiere_s'amuse said:

Is this the "Daddy's Little Meatball" guy? I remember reading that and thinking ... wow ... if that's your idea of an icebreaker ... 😬

 

 

Confirmed.

 

https://archive.ph/lUfQn

[Jkaczanowski]

I tried to read it, I really did.  I got to day 2 before I just couldn’t do it anymore. What a pompous, egotistical ass that guy is. 

Edited May 31 by Jkaczanowski

[HicksRA]

14 minutes ago, Jkaczanowski said:

I tried to read it, I really did.  I got to day 2 before I just couldn’t do it anymore. What a pompous, egotistical ass that guy is. 

Exactly what I did. Couldn’t suffer past day 2. 

[Ocean Boy]

I thought it was pretty entertaining and humorous but went on for too long.🤷‍♂️

[Keksie]

He reads like a sad guy who expects others to entertain him and who drinks too much.  Not someone I would want to hang out with or read.

[livingonthebeach]

My impression is that the writer was paid to write a negative review which he surely embellished with lots of hyperbole and a sprinkling of sarcasm. That was an expensive article for the Atlantic - wonder if they got their money's worth? I don't think RCI would ever advertise there so I don't think they lost a client.